New Comic

[not_onyourside]

You are far too happy about my imprisonment. Considering I do not have my cigarettes and am going to be hanged, I am not quite sharing your excitement.

No, I am not looking forward to finding out what happened and I do not care about zhe ridiculous conjectures everyone ees making. I zhink you are all overreacting.

Perhaps your time would be better spent doing somezzing ozer zhan sitting zhere making zhat obnoxious noise?

Comments

[hasstandards]

My mundane hasn't sat still since the bloody comic came out, wonderin' where I am. Not that it's any of her business.

At least we know where you are. Can't say I'm surprised.

[not_onyourside]

I am sure you are een Australia somewhere. Living een dirt and eating dead bugs or somesuch.

I blame zhis entirely on Scout.

[hasstandards]

And why do you keep hangin' around that bloody gremlin, exactly?

[not_onyourside]

Because eef I did not, he would be dead. Do you honestly zhink he can take care of himself?

[hasstandards]

No. But you can take care of yourself and ought to, if you know what's good for you. You can't count on some Medic anymore to put you back together.

[not_onyourside]

Of course I can. But Scout cannot.

[And he was lonely and you were in Australia not entertaining him.]

Zhe less I see of Medic zhe better.

[hasstandards]

I'd agree if Scout weren't gettin' you into all kinds of trouble. That's assumin' he did, mind you.

[not_onyourside]

You do not believe me? Sniper I am offended.

[Picture of innocence here.]

[hasstandards]

[This look.]

[not_onyourside]

You are so cruel to me.

[hasstandards]

You're the one what makes it easy.

[not_onyourside]

You will be delighted to see me. Assuming I am not dangling from a rope. Zhat might not be a pleasant reunion.

[hasstandards]

You can get out of handcuffs and locked rooms. Can't imagine a rope would do much to stop you, even if you were hangin' from it.

[not_onyourside]

I have never been zhreatened wez hanging before. Eets barbaric, I did not even know zhat was still a manner of execution here.

Zhough I suppose eets preferable to being electrocuted to deazh.

[hasstandards]

It could always be worse, mate. I can think of far worse ways to die.

[not_onyourside]

Well yes, but I do not want to experience any of zhem. Plus I will have to die wez Scout. I can zhink of nozzing more humiliating.

[hasstandards]

How about Scout gettin' out of it while you take all the blame for whatever it is he did that landed you in there in the first place?

[shhhhh_secret]

(Obnoxious, snorting laughter.)

Prison stripes certainly suit you.

[not_onyourside]

I look good een anyzzing. Eets a gift mon ami.

[But he's narrowing his eyes at you.]

[shhhhh_secret]

(Gives no fucks. He's far too amused at his counterpart's predicament.)

Tell me, have zey allowed you to keep your mask, or do you have to make do wiz a paper bag over your head?

[not_onyourside]

I suppose you shall have to wait and see.

Een zhe mean time, might I inquire where you have been?

[shhhhh_secret]

Of course, I've been keeping my dearest darling company. She's been simply inconsolable since her little boy ran afoul of ze law.

...by ze way, did you know zat ze RED Scout's mozzer lives right across ze street from ze BLU Scout's mozzer? Small world, iz et not?

(And he's just going to grin his shark grin and leave you to assume the worst.)

[not_onyourside]

[You fiend.]

Does she? I am sure you are doing your utmost to keep her spirits up.


[And only her. And if you so much as glance at BLU Scout Ma while he's in prison he will personally extract your eyes from your head.]

[shhhhh_secret]

(More of that smarmy grin, because he's an asshole troll like that.)

[not_onyourside]

[GLARE]


I do not want to know.