England is currently on fire - Canon is Far Cry 3

[thedefinitionof_insanity]

 You think this is bad? Come to my island and then try and fucking complain. 

Comments

Meet insanity embodied.

[warring_triad]

What kind of island~?

Oh sweet nipple biscuits

[thedefinitionof_insanity]

[Grins like he's remembering something]

The kind that tourists, and spoiled little Americans can't stop visiting

That is the perfect reaction to meeting Kefka.

[warring_triad]

[Kefka just kind of pouts.]

Ugh, one of those islands. All the sun and surf, crystal blue waters, sandy beaches and the like?

Blech. Can't stand them. What you need is a nice desolate place devoid of any kind of life really.

I put a lot of thought into it

[thedefinitionof_insanity]

[A low chuckle emanates from the back of his throat as he gets to his feet, wagging his finger]

Almost, you almost have it, hermano. It has everything, my island - sand, crystal waters full of all the sharks and little sea creatures, hot climate all year round.

But the people that come, they want a holiday, I end up with extra target practice.

And you did not disappoint.

[warring_triad]

Oho~? Using alluring paradise-like scenery to lure unsuspecting fools to their deaths?

I like you.

This pleases a man

[thedefinitionof_insanity]

[There's a shrug]

Something like that. I do not like having people arrive there, but, what can you do but make them wish they'd stayed on their boats, eh?

And just what IS a man!?

[warring_triad]

[Kefka just grins, the gears grinding along in his head.]

Why stop there? Why not blow those ships sky high!? Use 'em as over-sized fireworks!

This gorgeous bastard right here

[thedefinitionof_insanity]

That is very true, amigo - I like the way you think

[But.]

But, there is only so much fun you can have from a distance. When people trespass and screw with what's mine, I prefer a much more..hands on approach

[If you haven't already seen 'the Far Cry experience', now would be a good time to look it up and watch Vaas' daily tortures]

|3

[warring_triad]

See, that's why you need magic on your side.

[He waves a hand, conjuring a massive fireball overhead.]

It's like throwing stones, but stones that explode and burn with the heat of the sun!

-o-

[thedefinitionof_insanity]

[Holy fuck nuggets]

[At first his expression reads clear as day as 'what the fuck is this sorcery where the fuck is my bag of salt', but then it relaxes into an astounded, but impressed, smirk, accompanied by a slow clap]

Magic, eh...I don't know what the fuck that is [Motioning to the ball'o'fire] or how you can do it - but it's very impressive, hermano. Almost makes me want to throw in the knife and upgrade