And so he spoke, and so he spoke...

[shits_gold]

Your Mundanity,

It pleases me that you finally see your error in taking on my wretched son. But I will forgive your stupidity, so long as you pledge to never touch that account again. You have a royal heart, Mundane. Do not tarnish it with the likes of lechers like Tyrion, or that vile octopus. Remain pure, and I offer you my fealty.

Yours,
Tywin Lannister

Comments

[on_the_books]

Oh, come on now. They're not so bad, really. A dwarf perverted in all the right ways, and a monster of the old gods? Sounds like a pretty good time, if you ask me.

[shits_gold]

A pretty good time? Surely you don't mean to insult my mundane by implying he requires nothing more than that?

[gerionsdaughter]

[It's not like Joy is scared of her uncle. She's not. She's just really respectful of him. So she'll probably just stay in silence while her uncle speaks. And after that.
Probably he'll not notice her.]

[on_the_books]

Not at all. Perversion and indulgence are great. Hell, they make my job easier. They're not all there is to life, of course, They're just what make it worth living.

[shits_gold]

[The Lord of Casterly Rock did not reach his current stature by being oblivious to the presence of others. Of course Tywin notices his bastard niece, but he gives no indication of this fact. She will either choose to address him, or remain silent. He cares not which.]

[shits_gold]

And yet they are the idles of the masses. A lord's right is to lead the lowborn, not to surrender to the same vices that they enjoy.

[sixthanimorph]

So. You're the Tywin Lannister.

I didn't think you'd be so... tall.

[gerionsdaughter]

[In the end, she does choose to address him.]
I am sure that your mundane will be... Will be sensible enough to understand what you ask of him, and that you do it for... For the better of him.
[She nods]

[shits_gold]

You must have thought I shared my dwarf son's low stature?

[The barest hint of a smile creases the Lannister lord's cheek.]

[on_the_books]

Now now, I happen to know for a fact that you've got your vices, Lord Tywin. I've had you on the books for as long as I've had anyone, so don't give that poor kid you call a mundane such a bad time for enjoying himself.

[shits_gold]

You're delusional, friend. And you ought to note whom you are addressing. I have nothing if not patience, but you'd be foolish to try mine.

[sixthanimorph]

Actually... um, yeah. Kind of.

[And now he'll just be rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.]

I met him once. After everything I heard about your family, I was kind of...

[Don't say 'disappointed' to the dude's dad, David.]

... underwhelmed.

[Oh, yeah. Because that's so much better.]

[shits_gold]

What sorts of things did you hear, boy? My house has a lengthy history, and I doubt you've been alive long enough to have heard it all.

[sixthanimorph]

From your son, not a whole lot. Actually, I heard most of it from--

[From a crazy Targaryen who ran around calling himself 'the dragon'.]

Actually, forget who I heard it from. He didn't know much of your history, I guess, just the sigil of your house and your motto, basic stuff.

[A brief, embarrassed laugh.]

Actually, he thought I was one of you at first.

[shits_gold]

I hope you're right, child. I won't waste my time with fools, not when the realm lies in such disarray, banners raised for any man bold enough to name himself a king.

[placeintheworld]

[Lindsey raises an eyebrow] Why is my writer clapping and dancing now that you've appeared?

[shits_gold]

[A smile.]

Your writer knows what true greatness looks like.

[shits_gold]

That was a foolish thought. And why do you suppose he thought this?

Your hair, most like. We Lannisters tend to have golden hair. But Lannister hair does not make one a Lannister.

[placeintheworld]

[Well she does play him, Lindsey can't argue with that.] ...and that'd be you Mr...

I'm sorry, My Lord. [Thankfully he's used to lords of this or that.]

[grownintodreams]

Pure. Interesting way of putting that.

[His tailor does good work, and the cane is from an old injury, but really nothing can disguise that Miles only barely brushes five feet himself.]

[myfairlady]

[ that goddamn octopus. however, she's curious — ] What's wrong with Tyrion?

[ she has no idea who tyrion is, actually. ]

[on_the_books]

Oh, I'm a lot of things. Handsome, a good driver, popular with the ladies even. Delusional, however, isn't one of them. You can pretend to be without sin until you're blue in the face, but at the end of the day, when it's time to settle accounts, your soul's as heavy as anyone else's. Isn't your House motto "A Lannister always pays his debts". You should know the value of a soul better than most.

[shits_gold]

I should think so. Since the days of King Aegon, the men of Casterly Rock have kept the ironborn at bay, a tradition I have upheld with honor. I am Warden of the West for a reason.

[shits_gold]

I will tolerate nothing less from myself; why should I allow it in my mundane?

[shits_gold]

My son is a brilliant man. But he wastes his time whoring and drinking. He has earned nothing but my contempt.