dear_mun | (no subject)

Do you ever think it's weird that you know everything about me, but I don't know anything about you? I reckon this is how it happened:

(Scene. Derelict bookshop in an alleyway. With looooads of books. Like Moony sort of books. THUNDER CRACKS OMINOUSLY.)

YOU. Oh hullo, do you have any autobiographies on particularly dashing British fellows?

SHOPKEEPER. Oh yes, would you be interested in learning about one Sirius Black? He's the most dashing of all the dashing fellows.

YOU. However did I never notice? Ta very much. I will now give you my left kidney as payment.

SHOPKEEPER. Cheers mate. (He grins toothily. But alas! What will he do with the kidney? FIND OUT MORE NEXT TIME.)

If you were anyone else, I'd think that you were on the pull. Which is nothing to be ashamed about, really, 'cause who wouldn't want to pull me? Lots of birds out there do. Even James, absolutely smashing and Lilysexual bloke that he is, has snogged me whilst pissed. There was tongue. On his end, not mine.

. . . Lily, if you're listening, you're one lucky girl.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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Harry, love, do cover your eyes and ears when around Sirius. I would hate for him to corrupt you.

Sorry, my tongue must've slipped. What I meant to say is that your parents are two lovely chaste songbirds who would never even dream of doing anything more than holding hands in their room. Whilst leaving the door open and unlocked to corrupt the poor innocent eyes of anyone trying to get their sodding Transfiguration essay.