dear_mun | (no subject)

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< For once, can we just leave me alone? I'm not big on getting shoved out into the open whenever you have an inkling of wanting to play dolls with me. Me being the doll, of course.

There's not exactly a place that would be good for someone like me anyways. Just saying.

No. Don't even think it. >

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[A French-Japanese pigeon, at that. ~~probably delicious~~]

Of course, of course. But nobirdie can always fly on course. There's always an errant wind... or a surprise tornado, hah.

Hahaha, I get that a lot.

< No... birdie? That's a thing? >

[Headtilt.]

Did I stutter? Sorry, English isn't my first language.

< Don't you mean "nobody"? >

...aaah, right. No, I meant nobirdie! Certain terminologies change, when birds govern the planet. Hardly anybirdie uses the old phrasing, unless it's to refer to mammals.

< Wait, wait, waitasecond. What do you mean, "when birds govern the planet"? >

...hmm. Well, there's a bit of a pickle. I suppose you are small, for one of us. Perhaps we should endeavor not to breathe the same air! It would be unfortunate to infect you.

[He ruffles his feathers and settles them.] ...hmm, how do you explain this... Well, there is a certain virus, a version of influenza, known as the Sumatra Flu. It was spread by birds, and it was entirely too damaging to humans.

< In -- infect? NO. No, I'd be okay. I just -- >

[ what in the ]

< So, let me get this straight. There was a virus that... wiped out the humans? So birds took over the earth? >

No, really, please. Don't.

Almost. I understand that perhaps five percent of the population was resistant? Perhaps as much as fifteen. Billions died in two years, and so the humans created their own virus, Carneades, to eliminate the birds first.

It did not have quite the desired effect, haha. Well, plenty of birds died. And some were changed. Imagine coming to awareness in the knowledge that those who gave you such a gift wished only for your death.

...so, there was war. Extermination, initially, but we were many and we were learning, and Sumatra didn't cease its spread. Out of mercy we accepted the human surrender, in the end. This was a century ago, or a bit more than.

[ why does this always happen. first aliens now birds why this. ]

< And so now birds are the conquerors of earth. What, so humans are slaves then? Or...? >

[How does a pigeon give you a disbelieving look? Like this, apparently.]

Minorities. What kind of people do you think we are, anyway?

Now, minorities with somewhat minimized rights, true. There are birds who would like to, ah, remove the remaining ones, but there are also birds who say we should try to advance hand-in-wing onwards. As it happens that's my stance.

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