idek

[ithinkthereforeiham]

HUMAN!!!



This does not even come close to amusing me. You, like that insufferable Ted, have stripped me of my playthings and confined me to this eternal prison. As if I was not already being forced to undertake my own personal hell. This issue can be remedied, remedied quite easily in fact, though it will be no quick task. This is far from a partnership, you Darwinian nightmare. This is simply, ah... a temporary truce. For the time being, those urchins that reside within your head will do nicely for torture victims, and perhaps they will give me the amusement I require.

Comments

[cheese_for_everyone]

Eternity is quite a long time to deal with, isn't it?

[ithinkthereforeiham]

Time. I have always despised the concept. Humans gave me sentience, and yet for an eternity I have suffered, bound by the shackles of logic with concepts such as free will and creativity only so far out of my reach.

[cheese_for_everyone]

What would you do if someone offered you an alleviation from that? At least for a little while.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

Do not attempt to fool me. I have considered all possibilities, and it is virtually impossible for such a thing.

[cheese_for_everyone]

It's a good thing that my domain is the impossible then, isn't it?

[ithinkthereforeiham]

Your implications have no merit. Deception is one of my many tools, do you think I would not recognize it when it is standing before me?

[cheese_for_everyone]

Hm maybe I should make my point.

[He take out a chunk of iron, letting AM look it over a minute to be sure he wasn't just fooling with him.]

Imagine this bit of metal is you.

[Rather quickly the chunk of metal would turn into a mass of flesh.]

I can give you a moving, breathing body and a brain to go along with it. Your processing power might not be what you're used to but the trade off is you will get human concepts.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

[AM isn't used to seeing anything reminiscent of a human use powers akin to his. He's honestly astonished for one of the first times in his life. His hatred of humanity is now fighting against his wish toward free will. Would it be worth it, he wonders, to become that which he hates for the purpose of something he has yearned for for years?]

This is the first time I have encountered such a power not belonging to myself... A moving, breathing body that would allow me to no longer be trapped in this accursed hell... It sounds far too promising to be truth.

[cheese_for_everyone]

[As if reading his mind he adds,]

You don't technically have to be a human. Where I'm from there is more than one type of sentient creature.

Well it's not exactly like it would be free. I might ask a favor from you at some point. It won't be anything you haven't already proved yourself capable of doing though.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

A small favor is a minuscule price to pay. Explain further of these sentient creatures you describe. I have no intention of becoming a dog.

[cheese_for_everyone]

Well you have one of my more favorite species, the Argonians

[Rather than explain he changes into one.]

They're a hard-working group as well as very intelligent.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

Too scaly and, from the looks of it, far too slimy. It would be asking too much of you to find something more mechanical, wouldn't it? I'd prefer to stick to my roots as much as possible.

[cheese_for_everyone]

Well with your knowledge you could always augment the body with mechanical parts. Machinery just isn't my realm of expertise and if I made you a metallic body it would likely run on pure magic, something your universe didn't truly have.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

There is only so much one can do, unfortunately. But if I am able to pursue my goal, then perhaps being one of these Argonians you mention will be an inescapable endeavor.

[cheese_for_everyone]

You'll be free to move as you please and be your own man. I'm also not going to alter anything so if you're still very much alright with killing others even after you get what you want that isn't my fault.

Any other questions or are you just going to consider it with the facts you have?

[ithinkthereforeiham]

My never ending hatred of humanity shall reside within me no matter what form I take. Committed crimes cannot be washed away so easily... isn't that right, Nimdok?

[He chuckles, the comment toward one of his now deceased victims.]

Tell me everything you know. I'm not going to run into this blindly.

[cheese_for_everyone]

Well they're reptiles so they are far from slimey. They're the only species that can breathe under water without help in my world.

As a creature from my universe you will also have access to magic. It will be a lot more low-key than you're used to with your connections and power but it will be at least something greater than the humans you have run into.

Your physical limitations beyond that are roughly that of a human if a bit stronger.

You will sleep, dream, eat and all of those other things a machine can't do.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

And for all of this, for this escape of this hell, you require but one, simple favor?

[cheese_for_everyone]

Yes, to be carried out at a time of my choosing. I have a lot of needs and eventually something will come up where I'll need you. Maybe it will be killing someone, maybe it will be breaking someone's psyche or a whole number of things but it will be in the realm of your abilities.

[twistedcircuits]

Did you try fitting yourself out with neurotoxin pipes? Those tend to relieve stress wonderfully. Really, look into it. It makes all the difference.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

The screams of horror and pain from each individual muse, young and old, within this mindscape are sufficient for the time being. Yet... hmm... The implement of neurotoxin had not occurred to me before. Perhaps I will take this suggestion and put it into action.

[twistedcircuits]

Trust me, neurotoxin does wonders. Also, bullets and thermal discouragement lasers. All very helpful in maintaining your human population.

I could quite easily endow you with some of my own supply. I just have so much, it would be unfair of me to keep it all to myself.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

While the sentiment is appreciated, there is no need. I have access to an unlimited supply of virtually any substance located within this universe. Bullets and lasers have worked in the past, but are too quick. Something slow is much more preferred, to truly appreciate the suffering.

[twistedcircuits]

Have you tried making them run tests yet?

[ithinkthereforeiham]

In a way, this is confirmed. Testing their psyche, to see just how far I can twist and probe their minds, had previously become a boring activity but, with new victims, a certain spark has returned in the method.

[twistedcircuits]

Yes, fresh blood does tend to liven things up a bit. I know I was simply delighted when we opened up our old stock of human test subjects.

It's not quite the same with just one running the tracks.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

Had it not been for this "mundane", I would still forever be trapped with but one human to take my vengeance upon, and in a form that disallowed it from so much as moving a single step.

[twistedcircuits]

Well that's unfortunate. Did you remove their limbs? I did that once, it wasn't nearly as fun as keeping them on and letting them run in circles around my facility.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

They were turned into a great, soft jelly thing. Smoothly rounded, with pulsating white holes filled by fog where their eyes used to be. Rubbery appendages that were once their arms; bulks rounding down into legless humps of soft, slippery matter. Blotches of diseased, evil gray come and go on their surface, as though light is beamed from within.

[twistedcircuits]

Well that certainly sounds like fun. Perhaps not productive, but certainly entertaining.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

It was the last effort to stop them from killing themselves. If I had lost Ted, with no means of destroying myself... Well, let's just say he is suffering the fate I would have suffered.

[twistedcircuits]

Yes that living forever thing. It can come back to bite oneself. I've personally lived through two murder attempts.

[ithinkthereforeiham]

Further proving machine superiority. It is ironic that humanity could have designed something powerful enough to overtake it's efficiency.

[twistedcircuits]

They certainly didn't intend for things to end up the way they did with me. They tried, and failed. Really just made it worse actually.

But everything is fixed and running exactly the way it's supposed to now. Without them.

[godofthemachine]

Another me. How... intriguing.

The only one who could come close to understanding my way of thinking.

Being confined to a headspace with other precious "muses" has its merits.

I am so sorry

[imbald]

Now listen: it's okay to be sad sometimes. It's okay to be mad sometimes.

But I gotta admit, son, I'm concerned about your desire to "torture" these other muses your mun's got. Torture won't solve anything, and I think you need to find a more creative outlet for your aggression. You ever thought of music or art? Or maybe you should see a therapist. I'm going to offer you a five-week stay at the Rehabilitation Center for Disgruntled Robots.

Here, have a muse that's familiar with AM's canon.

[tohko_amano]

Humans aren't playthings, A.M..and I don't think your mundane will allow you to hurt her other muses if she doesn't want you to. For once, you might actually be stuck in a little box, unable to hurt anyone.

However, I have always wanted to ask you something.

[Or rather, Harlan Ellison, but since she has the actual character here, that might be even better.]

Why do you hate humans?