voicetesting; canon is the Bartimaeus trilogy

[birthname]

This is absolutely out of the question. I need to get back to London. Who knows how bad things've gotten while I've been gone.

And no, the username is neither clever nor even vaguely amusing. Don't you dare tell anyone, or I swear I'll send a marid after you.

[Nathaniel? Who's Nathaniel? His name is John Mandrake, dammit.]

Comments

[ladyofadventure]

In my experience Londoners can usually take care of themselves.

[birthname]

Not the commoners.

[ladyofadventure]

Oh, dear. What gives you such a low opinion of them?

[birthname]

Because that is what they deserve.

[ladyofadventure]

[Snotty little brat, isn't he?] Who are you to judge that?

[birthname]

[It unfortunately comes with the job description.

And said like it's obvious:] I am a magician.

[ladyofadventure]

That's interesting, but hardly vital to the welfare of London, surely. [She's thinking of conjurers' tricks, not real magic.]

[birthname]

If we do not protect Britain, nobody will.

[The statement sounds rote-learned, though he says it very earnestly.]

LATE TO THIS but omg I saw this on the tag list and went :D

[o_ace_one]

Oh, I like that username.

aslkdjfkjdfkjdf I think I love you. BARTIMAEUS COME TO ME <3

[birthname]

Yes, of course you would.

LOVE TO YOU TOO, I love seeing Nathaniels <3!

[o_ace_one]

[Suddenly, Ptolemy guise!1]

Aw, come on, no need to be like that, Natty-boy! And there I thought you would be pleased to see me.

1. Despite the lack of any actual Ptolemy icons. That'll be fixed. Eventually. Maybe.

Bartimaeus muses are so few and far between ;__;

[birthname]

[The fact that you have sarcastic facial expressions only makes it worse. :|]

Pleased to see you and your kind haven't yet destroyed London? Yes.

I know right 8( I have a dream that there will be a billion more some day

[o_ace_one]

Me, destroy London? [He crosses his arms in a huff.] Considering the number of times I've saved it?1 That's harsh!

1. Practically by myself too.

sigh. Perhaps if ever a movie comes out. We can always hope. :3

[birthname]

You are a demon.

[This Nat has obviously not made it past the third book yet.]

oh god I would so love to have a movie, fingers crossed!

[o_ace_one]

[Pout :T]

Still got some growing up to do, I see. When are we ever going to get past all this silly 'demon' business, honestly.

and fingers crossed that they won't ruin it, either

[birthname]

[Pouting doesn't suit you, Bartimaeus.]

How did you get in here, anyway?

no post | why hello there, you handsome essence you

[likesfootnotes]

[Narcissism comes standard with every Bartimaeus. Sup.]

(djinni are never late, they are always summoned at exactly the wrong time and then drag their feet)

[likesfootnotes]

Summon me once and suddenly you think you're a marid-class magician? I'm not surprised. After all, I am a specimen of extraordinary power and skill, but you succeeding with a one-off summoning does not make you The Magician.

[Bartimaeus is first book; he hasn't had the full pleasure of Nathaniel's mastery.]

(Nattyboy summons you because deep in his heart he really loves you. Really.)

[birthname]

[Then Bartimaeus may be interested to note that Nathaniel has apparently shot up six inches and looks distinctly in the throes of adolescence, ridiculous coat and all.]

What do you mean, once? And I've learned quite a bit more since we last met.

( Bartimaeus did not need to hear about his djinni!kink. =/ )

[likesfootnotes]

[You humans grow like weeds. He's trying no to notice, but his Ptolemy form might just be creeping up in the inches to match or dwarf him. The fashion, however, he will leave to Nathaniel, if that's what he calls fashion.]

Once, as in the number of times that you have successfully summoned me. Don't tell me that you don't know how to count. ¹

And I doubt that anything you've picked up would be of interest to me. But do try some more punishment spells! I love your expression when I reflect them back at you.

1 - Unsurprisingly, there are major gaps in every magician's education. Typically, How To Dismiss Your Djinni In A Timely Manner and etiquette lessons are first on the chopping block, but apparently they've cut basic arithmetic as well.

(sob why do you always twist my words, Bartimaeus. ;A;)

[birthname]

[It is too fashion. :|]

You're the one who's misremembering. What about Prague, and the golem?

(the same reason Nathaniel summons him, probably: because he's a jerk)

[likesfootnotes]

[It is not. It is what happens when you put a perfectly good pair of baggy pants in the wash and they shrink, and then you repeat the process four times.]

What about it? You weren't there. You weren't even alive yet, as I recall it. Ah, the good ol' days.

(why can't we just all be fr--oh wait, I forgot that it's these two we're talking about))

[birthname]

[Don't forget the flouncy sleeves and colorful hankies.]

Of course I was there. It wasn't that long ago.

(best friends for-never, amirite?)

[likesfootnotes]

[How could he forget those reject hot-air balloons pinned to his shoulders and what results when a tacky rainbow sneezes into a tablecloth?]

Invented time travel, have we? Having been present, I can assure you that you were not the magician plaguing me in 1868.

(yes.)

[birthname]

[And those over-shiny shoes. Nat has too much free time and boot polish on his hands.

Just. Blinking confusedly at you now.]

It obviously wasn't 1868. I don't know what game you're trying to play, but whatever it is, stop it.