weekends do strange things

[brentwood]

So, uh, that's it?

You find out there's a video game about boarding school and then- poof- I show up? Not that I don't believe you but I'd personally like to think there was more to that thought process than you're letting on. I'm not that simple to conjure up, am I?

Also, that user name isn't great for hiding a secret ID. Just sayin'. And. If I could be back before curfew that'd be grea-- what? What do you mean you think you'll keep me around? You already have a me in your head! [ wow. weird. ] Just. Ugh.

Keep it to the small stuff, okay? Okay.

Comments

[greenteengenius]

They were probably full of "feels".

And not "thinks".

[brentwood]

IIIII'm not sure I want to be handled by someone like that. [ He's not sure he likes being "handled"! ] I'm a firm believer that "thinks" should come way before "feels", not after. [ Otherwise, the "thinks" end up being of the glum sort. He should know. He's a teenage boy. ]

[greenteengenius]

Ah, but you are not a mundane, are you? They are ruled by their desire to see their beloved characters suffer and copulate, as far as I can tell.

[brentwood]

[ Error: 404. Page not found. ] Copulate. . . ?

[ NO NO NO DON'T ANSWER THAT THAT WAS NOT A QUESTION. ] Heh, well, I'm not going to let her force me to [ copulate ] do any of that. If she thinks I can't [ copulate ] fight back, she sure has another thing coming. [ copulate ]

[greenteengenius]

[Guess who's bad at social cues?]

Sex. Most of them are obsessed with it.

They all say that. Then they're forced onto some island where sex is required due to some extremely unlikely bit of pseudoscience.

[He sounds offended. By the pseudoscience, of course.]

[brentwood]

[ Oh god oh god initializing Evasive Maneuver 12. --even if. Pseudoscience. ] I'm too young for that!

[greenteengenius]

Really? I'm not that familiar with humans, but you don't appear much younger than I am.

[He doesn't actually care, mind you. He's already turned away and is poking at his omnicom.]

[brentwood]

No, trust me, one year [ Or more, in his case. ] makes all the difference between a good night out and being put behind bars. [ Oh god did he just PSA an alien? He thinks he just did. Awk-ward. ]

But. . . the island. It goes so far as to alter your genes?

[greenteengenius]

I doubt they have those laws.

That was simply an example. I understand there are multiple places they send people and various ways they force compliance.

[Lyrl's knowledge of these games comes entirely from other characters on here freaking out about them, so.]

[brentwood]

[ That sounds like it needs investigating. tim don't ]

Huh. And you. . . what places have you been sent to?

[greenteengenius]

I have been sent to a game which shortly perished and an alternate universe in which I lost my intelligence.

I think I might have preferred the sex requirement.

But I am no longer in either of them.

[brentwood]

[ "Lost my intelligence" sounds like-- worse than the sex thing, but Tim's definitely not going to prefer either. ]

Mind giving me any names? [ So he can know what to avoid? As if he had a say in it! ]

[greenteengenius]

I doubt you would have the same issue I have as a 12th-level intellect and therefore a "game-breaker".

But the latter game was called Sorting Hat. I was a wizard.

I do not think my mundane understands me.

[brentwood]

I got a 98 on my last test, and that's because I didn't study for it. [ That's something! And oh! Oh gosh that must have been a game set in the Harry Potter novels-- how cool. ]

. . . Must be hard to completely understand someone with a 12th-level intellect.

[greenteengenius]

I nearly successfully took over approximately 80 planets when I was a year old.

She thinks understanding of my personality is enough. Obviously not.

[brentwood]

You obviously win in that department but, uh- why?

Muns just. . . take what's easiest for them, ignore everything else. It's like-- I don't know. You took over 80 planets?

[greenteengenius]

I have no idea. My father lobotomized me so I don't remember it.

Yes, that does seem to be the case. Yes, with mind control. Mind control can be very effective if one is careful to kill everyone it doesn't effect. Obviously, I did not.

[brentwood]

[ That's-- what-- uh. There's some serious alarms going off in his head right now. ] The games took away that mind control, too, obviously. [ But really he's saying it like a question. ]

[greenteengenius]

[As there should be.]

No, I no longer have access to father's program, but I'm sure I could make my own. Something better. I simply have no interest in it. I have my education to further.

[brentwood]

[ . . . . . he can't not ask! ] How?

[greenteengenius]

It would be imprudent to answer that.

[flyingg]

I don't know. I think you do very well with being summoned as easily as you're needed, personally.

[brentwood]

[ Hi, big bro, hi. ] "Needed" being the key word here, Nightwing. I'm not some portable, pint-sized genie in a bottle.

[flyingg]

[Hello, little brother!]

Well, no, of course you're not. But it's not like we're not used to being available on call.

[brentwood]

Did you know there's a little pug that would like nothing more than to bite my ankles off? His name's Cardigan. [ It makes being on call a noisy affair. :C ]

I've started to walk him and stuff so he doesn't give me away when I'm coming back to school grounds way late.

[flyingg]

Cardigan. And they say I'm horrible with naming things.

Don't dog treats work?

[brentwood]

That's because you are.

They might, but I don't want to reek of bacon and pig ears while in costume, too.

[flyingg]

Not that bad! Why name a pug after a piece of clothing?!

And, let's admit it. It's not the worst or the strangest thing our work clothes have smelled of. By far.

[brentwood]

Buttons would be kind of nice-- but admit it, you'd name a pug Buttons Jr or something as horrendous. Instead of Rex, like a normal dog should be named.

Ha! Considering the times we've gone dumpster diving, no, it's not.

[flyingg]

... come on, like if you call out Rex, half the park's puppies won't be confused! A little originality, please. I mean, even Rory would be better. Or Roxie, for a girl.

Or sewer strolling. Yep.

[brentwood]

[ Tim's nose scrunches up a little. No Man's Land sure has. . . fun memories. ] We lead charmed lives.

[flyingg]

[And the concern is immediate and clear on Dick's face.]

Sorry. We sorta do, but - sorry.

[wing_of_night]

I wouldn't worry too much. Alfred doesn't keep track of curfews up here.

[brentwood]

Alfred might not, but the dean back at school does. He's already keeping a close eye on me after he caught me sneaking in after-hours. I really don't need another demerit.

[wing_of_night]

I'm pretty sure Bruce can persuade the Dean to lay off if you start having issues. I'm fairly sure he owns the place anyway.

Still, you probably should try to cut back on the Robin time as much as possible. Just because I dropped out of school doesn't mean you get to. Gotham is in good hands, help when you can, but don't let your grades suffer. Got it?

[brentwood]

[ Erk! ] Yeah, but what if I don't want Bruce getting me out every scrape I get myself into? [ He doesn't need handouts, alright? He can handle it. Maybe. ]

I'm not out looking for trouble, and I--

[ A pause, and a long suffering sigh-- ] I'll stay out of trouble, officer.

[wing_of_night]

Hey, you're Robin, the Boy Wonder. That kind of thing kinda takes precedence over curfews. I'm not saying he should get you out of every scrape, but it won't hurt once in a while.

[Have an eye roll followed by a hair ruffle.]

Don't go all formal on me, Tim. It gives me the willies.

[brentwood]

Yeah, yeah, well-- fingers crossed. [ alskdfjalsd not the hair! ]

It's a wonder you could ever stay in a suit long enough to tag along with B in all his gala events. Allergic to decency, you are. Sir.

[wing_of_night]

I grew up in a circus, Tim. I remember sneaking off and taking naps with lions. Formality isn't my thing. I am much more comfortable in leotards.

Babs was the only thing keeping me interested in formal functions long enough to attend.

[brentwood]

And to be fair, going all day in a tie and blazer isn't that great. Like, at all.

How many ice sculptures did you two wreck?

[evenrobin]

Is one of you a girl? Because that's the shit I've got to deal with.

[brentwood]

[ !!

--Jason??

Yes, that's Jason.

Wow. Wow. ] What? [ Sorry, repeat the question-- somebody was distracted. ]

[evenrobin]

[Yeah, he is totally eating this shit up.] Are my dashing good looks that distracting?

[brentwood]

What? [ No, shhh, his brain's catching up with him here! ] No! I just. . . have a small hearing problem. [ What. ]

[evenrobin]

[Jason manages to look both amused and unimpressed.] Oh, come on, I know he taught you to lie better than that.

[brentwood]

I'm not lying!

[ . . . yeah, that's not gonna fly. ]

Okay, I'm lying. But. It's just that I never thought that I'd see you [ how do you even say this ] this young. [ Phew. ]

[evenrobin]

[The roughness fades, a little, and he offers a small, bleak smile.] It's okay. You don't hang around here too long without learning a few things.