What?

[shot_watson]

This is a terrible idea. No one likes canon-based original characters anyway. Well, of course someone shot him! He "Got Shot" he didn't "Shoot himself"!

Fine. What if the production team decides to reveal who shot him, hum? What then? Are you going to completely scrap me at that point? Or turn me into an "alternate version" of that character.

Look, I understand what you are trying to do. I can even understand why you would want to do this. But, that in no way means this is a good idea in any universe.

Go and bother one of the others you have up here in your head, if you're so bored.

Comments

[the_worst]

Whatcha mean 'no one likes canon based oh-sees'? Everybody'luvs'us! And those that don't are jus' jellis that we've got more flexibility than cannon folks do.

Aaaall of that said, who'd you shoot?

[shot_watson]

[She sighs. This is all she needs: some farm chick trying to cheer her up.]

And army doctor. Spared his life, actually - I didn't have to miss.

[And that was a not-so-veiled threat.]

[the_worst]

That was mighty kind of ya. What'd you shoot him with?

[shot_watson]

[There's a hint of a smile. She misses the war in some ways. She certainly was never bored.]

An AK-47. I was a quite a distance. He doesn't even know it was me.

[the_worst]

Why'd you use an AK? I'd think an M16 or AR-15'd work better overa distance. 'Course I'm partial to rocket launchers meself.

[shot_watson]

Because it doesn't work as well over a distance. It makes the fact that I spared his life appear to be accidental.

[All said with the subtext of "Duh".]

[the_worst]

Or it'll look like someone used the wrong type of gun and he just got lucky. Whywer you shootin doctors anyway?

[shot_watson]

[Her tone takes on a dark quality.]

It was my assignment.

[Sort of, she's got a complicated history.]

[the_worst]

I hope your teacher didn't grade on a curve.

[shot_watson]

[Clara's expression reads: What the hell are you talking about?]

Who are you?

[the_worst]

I'm Bo Lionel Crowder-Luthor o'course! Don't you evar read newspapers?

[shot_watson]

I read the news, doesn't mean I've heard of you.

[She doesn't read American news.]

[the_worst]

Sounds like you need a text to speech program.

[shot_watson]

Right. Thanks for proving to my mun why no one likes original characters. I think she's going to retire me now.

[the_worst]

Aw now don't be like that, don't let'er ship you off to Florida to be with all those old fogies. I was just bein sassy!

[shot_watson]

Are you always like this or is this the way you greet everyone new to this area?

[the_worst]

I'm always like this, I get it from both my fathers' ::she shrugs::

Lets start over again, get us on the right feet. Hi! I'm Bo Lionel Crowder-Luthor! Who are you?

[shot_watson]

[She's bored, but smiles.]

Clara. Clara Jones.

[She extends her hand.]

[the_worst]

::she's interested, but yawns during the handshake because she has a condition::

Nice ta meetya, I hope your mun lets you stick around! Why'd you let that army doctor go if you were posed to shootem for an assignment? Did you get fired?

[shot_watson]

I don't enjoy killing people.

[She had to, but she saved those she could.]

[thehutt]

[in huttese of course]

Hurm hurm. Are you being mean to my beautiful Bo Bo?

[shot_watson]

Oh ugly!

[She pulls out a sidearm that she always has with her these days.]

[thehutt]

[still in huttese because he is a hutt]

You don't call me ugly! I was voted Mr. Universe five years in a row! Does your planet not teach you about the beauty of diversity? Racist human!

[he is not afraid of the gun and presses a button to open the door to the rancor house]

This is my pet, Gwendolyn. I DARE YOU TO SAY SHE IS UGLY. YOU AND YOUR PREJUDICE IS WHAT IS UGLY.

[the_worst]

Aw Gwendolyn! I miss her so much it has been ages since I visited you on Tattooine Peepaw!

::holds up a dewback egg for Gwendolyn because it is her favorite treat::

[thehutt]

[lionel is ok speaking to his granddaughter in huttese because she knows so many languages, even star wars ones]

You should come visit me more often! Cousin Herngleduck misses you and wants to play frisbee!

::Gwendolyn eats the treat and gives Bo Lin a high five::

[the_worst]

::gives Gwendolyn a high-3 since rancors have three finger-claw things not five so she can't give high-5s then scratches behind her ears(?)::

Well with preechin on the weekends and my work at the lab at Luthorcorp's lab and my photoshoots for the Daily Planet, my times' all filled up lately. Ain'tlike I can just hop on a rocket and come down for the weekend. Cousin Herngleduck keeps cheetin at frisbee tho, he better not use his laserpistol next time!!

[thehutt]

[it is the same thing, don't you be a racist too and tell Gwendolyn what to do]

He only cheats because you are so much better at frisbee, he needs to catch up somehoe. Hungleduck likes you the best even if you aren't a hutt.

[lionel gives bo lin a kiss on the cheek]

Send me a dvd of your preaching in the space mail. I want to know about the big book with small letters. We don't have those biblethings on Tattoine OR Huttlandia, capital of the Hutts.

[shot_watson]

[Fortunately for Clara, she is as observant as Sherlock, but actually dabbled in pop culture a bit more. She knows exactly where she's standing and what happens when the Hutt presses the button. She jumps accordingly, lands in a safe area and just stares at him. She once again levels the gun at him.]

I'm not an idiot, best you don't treat me as such.

[thehutt]

[THE HUTT IS SURPRISED AT HER AGILITY]

ho ho ho!

[though he is laughing in surprise, it is still in a noticeably huttese accent]

You are full of surprises, little one! I will not let the rancor eat you if you agree to work for me. I will pay you all the creidts or earth monies.

["ninjalike abilities but still a racist" he thinks]

[shot_watson]

[She can't understand huttese. But, she's heard that tone a lot over the last 10 years.]

Do I look like the sort to work for others?

[That said, she used to, but not now. She's her own agent now.]

[thehutt]

[she needs to learn, soon one in every 5 households in the galaxy will speak huttese]

Yes because you look like a lawyer I once dated at the same time as Captain Kirk. And lawyers get paid lots of money.

Why are you here in my palace?

[shot_watson]

[She'll pick it up soon enough. She just needs to hear a few words translated. Again, the tone tells her what is being asked.]

Probably because you kidnapped me.

[huttese[

[thehutt]

Because I have heard of all your deeds and I wanted to see for myself. I want you to be my head Bounty Hunter and I will give you a jet pack and rope and new tennis shoes for you to run in. Also I will pay for moving expenses and a U-haul.

[he rubs his belly because he is hungry]

What do you think, my little voorpak?

[shot_watson]

[She only understood the question - sort of. The rest she is assuming is some kind of threat. She doesn't respond well to threats.]

I already said, I don't work for others.

[Not anymore, anyway.]

[thehutt]

What do you do for the monies?

[shot_watson]

[She cocks her gun, still feeling threatened.]

I said, I'm not interested.

[thehutt]

[guns have no affect on hutts because their skin is so thick and lionel is not afraid]

I was trying to be nice because I was curious. And you replay me with violence! Gwendolyn, Lana, Tess, Jason, Sherlock - GET HER!!!!

::he presses another button and four very big rancors with big teeth and big claws chase the girl. they are hungry and the last person they ate was a jedi so they are very fast. the one called lana only has one eye and he even has a rancor named sherlock::

[shot_watson]

[The mention of "Sherlock" makes her realize this is all just a terrible nightmare! She wakes herself up and sits up panting in bed.]

Where the hell did that even come from!?

[She gets up and goes to sit near the window, overlooking the city. She sighs a bit sadly.]

Used to be New York was the "city that doesn't sleep" now... it's everywhere.

[thehutt]

[or WAS IT????!]

[LIONEL SUDDENLY BURSTS THROUGH HER DOOR SPILLING THE KOOL AID THAT WAS ON A TABLE BECAUSE HUTT HOSTAGES CAN NEVER GET AWAY!]

You don't get to leave! You will be my bounty hunter! Why did you leave me? I offered you such nice things! Not everyone gets a U-haul or new shoes. I would have let you have air jordans.

[he is speaking english now because hutts are multilingual]