Voice testing and thinking of apping at R/A

[bunchadirtbags]

Let me get this straight, Command.

You're telling me the entire planet has been attacked by the blues and all civilians have been replaced with giant robots? Huh.

....Sounds plausible. Is there nothing those dirt bags hold sacred? Robots are my territory! Unacceptable. Suppose I better go rally the troops then.

GRIF! Get out here! I want to see you get stepped on by a giant robot!

Comments

[backtothebrink]

[r u 4 srs?]

The hell are you babbling on about, soldier?

[bunchadirtbags]

Whoa whoa whoa, identify yourself little missy!

[backtothebrink]

[Soooo unimpressed. In utter deadpan:]

Alaska. Your turn.

[bunchadirtbags]

Alaska? Now wait a minute, ain't that one of them there... countries?

And the only soldiers named after countries are those crazy freelancers!

[backtothebrink]

I'm not with the Project. Washed out. "Total bust". I'm a freelancer in the generic, soldier-for-hire sense.

[bunchadirtbags]

....What color is your armor?

[backtothebrink]

Pale yellow. Green highlights. [Like so.]

[bunchadirtbags]

Hrrrrm.


...Alright. You're hired.

[backtothebrink]

All righty. Now we're cooking with gas. You need somebody dead? Just point 'em out, and this little beauty'll do the rest. Provided you can cough up some extra ammo after the job, of course.

[Sniper rifles need ammunition, after all.]

[bunchadirtbags]

Well, y' see... Grif is the one in charge of bringing the extra ammo. And being Grif he has an impeccable record.


Of never bringing any.

No worries though, the blue team is such a bunch of pansies you could probably kill 'em with mean looks alone!

[cantshutup]

Attacked by blues? How does that work?
Hey wait. Waaaait.
Whirl's blue and he's psycho. Fortmax has blue on 'im and HE went crazy...
Oh man, it makes so much sense now! The color blue IS evil-

Ah wait. Tailgate's got blue on him too and he's cool. Nice theory though.

[bunchadirtbags]

You see how it all starts to come together? Every horrible thing that has ever happened can be traced back to the blues.

Someone shot your teammate? Blues.

Your sandwich has inexplicably gone missing? Blues.

There's still dishes in the sink even after you threatened to break every one involved's leg? Blues.


....Or Grif. He also applies.

I think you need to take off those blue tinted glasses you got there and see things for what they really are.

[cantshutup]

Huh. So this really is a thing with you, is it? I was completely just having a go at you. My bad for reinforcing your little brain module defect thing.

Also what's a Grif? It sounds put upon, yet vaguely annoying.

[bunchadirtbags]

What are you anyway? A talking mini fridge? Interesting feature.

Grif is basically just a worthless pile of laziness and bad attitude. And chicken wings.