starting the app ;;

[donotcare]

 It's been a while since you've written an application from scratch, hasn't it?  I'm honored to bestow upon you any overwhelming sensation you feel.  I told you before how complex I was, I only hope you can figure me out in time.

Or at least that you can believe to have figured me out.



Watch those last few episodes.  We don't want to keep Caroline waiting.

Comments

[disparage]

[ caroline rolls her eyes. ]

[donotcare]

There she is.

[disparage]

You know, talking yourself up doesn't make you any more likeable.

[donotcare]

Then tell me what does. To you.

[disparage]

[ caroline sighs. ] You really want the list?

[donotcare]

[ his brows go up. ] I'm waiting.

[disparage]

[ she raises a finger. ] Don't kill my friends.

[ oh, wait, that seems to be it. ] On second thought, that's pretty much it.

[donotcare]

[ he smiles. ]

Are any of them even on the boat?

[disparage]

[ … caroline's tone is incredibly uncertain, and she's vocally expressing that she knows she's going to end up walking herself into a corner. ]

No.

[ quick autocorrect: ] But they could be! You never know. These things are like really bad surprise birthday parties.

[remorsefulness]

Stop stalking Caroline. [ it's creepy bro. ]

[donotcare]

It's not stalking if she's aware. [ ... which makes it totally less creepy? ]

[remorsefulness]

[ a look. ] Really?

[ stefan is so disappointed in you rn. ]

[donotcare]

[ back up. ] Really.

Looking out for someone isn't such a bad thing. You should know that better than anyone. [ now have that look right back. ]

[remorsefulness]

You're not looking out for her, Klaus. In case you've forgotten, you're incapable of caring about anybody but yourself.

[donotcare]

I cared about you. Once. [ maybe not but whatever people who don't care get to lie. ]

[remorsefulness]

You only cared because you enjoyed the way I tortured innocent people.

[ that's not something to be proud of, klaus. ]

[donotcare]

I enjoyed seeing you happy, Stefan. All I did was help you get that.

[ there's a brief pause. ]

Your welcome, by the way.

[disparage]

I'm pretty sure this is the part where I quote Mean Girls, but I have a feeling it might go over your head. [ your efforts are appreciated, though. best vamp bro ever. ] Being his creepy little hobby is so not fetch.

[remorsefulness]

"Fetch"? [ have a long confused look. ]

Klaus needs to realize that he can't have everything he wants. I mean, there's no way that you would ever actually fall for him, is there?

[disparage]

Ugh! No! [ great way to be offensive, stefan. ] He's - he's Klaus, Stefan. Seriously, you'd think I'd fall for him? You know who he is better than anyone!

[ klaus doesn't even watch mean girls. how can caroline fall for someone who isn't intent on being the male regina george? ]

[negotiates]

Going somewhere?

[donotcare]

Care to join me, brother?

[negotiates]

I can't say that I do. If you're leaving Mystic Falls, I'd much rather join Rebekah.

[donotcare]

Would you now? I must say, Elijah, that hurts.

[negotiates]

[Just going to ignore that. Doesn't really care that you're hurt, bro.]

Are you leaving soon?