Homeless forever, probably.

[qaunak]

It's alright, mun. I know there aren't many places out there for someone like me.

But I appreciate the chance at being able to see my sons again. I miss them both, Noatak especially... I thank you for this chance to see who they've become.

Comments

no worries at all! you work with what you're given.

[foreveryakone]

[ Gently: ] A reasonable concern. I know the last time I was out here I didn't have the pleasure of you by my side; it's always nice to have the family back together.

[ It's great, how he can say that with a straight face. But it's kind of true where she is concerned at least?? ]

No. We may be sharing a fate in that regard.

I try. Thanks. <3

[qaunak]

I think maybe it's best if we don't end up in games. I've heard some of them can get vicious, and that's not something I want our family to go through. It'll be hard, knowing our boys are out there doing spirits-know-what in those things, but they need to live their own lives.

...and you have a lot to answer for. [She just. Looks at him flatly. Their sons did not endeavor to keep things a secret here. She knows. And she's hurt, but it's so deep that it almost doesn't hurt, too deep and sharp to process yet.] Yakone.

of course. <3

[foreveryakone]

Yes. Much better living a life of peace. [ For the most part he can keep the bitterness out of his voice. ] Their own lives. There's an enormous amount of potential in those boys, should they ever be bothered to--

[ Oh. ]

And I see they've been talking.

[qaunak]

Yes, they have.

[She has a lot of questions, but all that comes out is this broken laugh, and it's not funny, and she's crying a little.]

All this time I thought... I loved you, and I was just there to create your weapons. It's... [Tears fall even as she tries to chuckle. Her heart is broken. No, more than that, her spirit is.] It's funny, I really loved you, and it took me this long to find out you never loved me back. I'm so stupid. [Her weak laugh turns into outright sobbing.]

[foreveryakone]

You're acting stupid now -- don't. Stop that.

[ No need to mince words at this point, he may as well let the rudeness flow. ]

I had no choice but to lie to you about who I was. You can understand that, can't you? I had no way of knowing if my talents would still pass on after they were stolen from me.

It's that they grew up into waterbenders that made all the difference.

Separate circumstances that all came into particular alignment. How could I throw that chance away?

[qaunak]

I can't. Because I would have loved you. It would have stayed our secret, and what we had would have been real. [She smiles, weakly.] It's a nice dream, isn't it? Maybe then you could have become something other than a monster.

A father would have thrown that chance away. For the sake of Noatak and Tarrlok's humanity. But you could never understand that, having none of your own... you're a good actor, you know. [She's serenely crying now, tears flowing but otherwise the picture of a smiling wife.] You fooled me, all those years. I'm such a fool. I thought you loved me. I thought you loved them. Tell me, did you ever say one thing to me and mean it? Anything at all? Was there - [she chokes a little from the wellspring of tears] was there one honest word that ever came from your lips?

[foreveryakone]

[ He's neither smug nor sympathetic at the moment -- cagey and irritated, mostly, because this wasn't something that was ever supposed to come to light. ]

Oh please. It isn't monstrous to make use of what you're given. Talents like mine are rare, and yes, feared, no one likes knowing of power greater than their own. What difference would it have made, if I'd told you? Would you have chosen the Avatar's side over your own husband's? After he stole--

[ Ah, there's that anger. No, not everything was a lie, but admitting that seems as good as admitting a weakness. So maybe it's better not to clarify. ]

All I did was try to teach them to be great.

[qaunak]

If you'd told me then we could have had an honest house. Not a house of secrets. Instead you betrayed me, you betrayed the love your sons had for you, and in the end you destroyed our family. Was it worth it? [Qaunak looks at him, her purple eyes searching.] Was it?

[foreveryakone]

If I'd told you there'd be no family at all. Don't kid yourself. There's no point in harboring any more delusion. You call it a betrayal, but I gave you a family that wouldn't exist if not for me. Those boys are still [ "mine" ] ours.

[ His own eyes narrow. He answers honestly: ]

Who knows?

[qaunak]

I could have loved you for who you were. We could have worked through who you used to be and had something that was real to both of us.

It would be better the family not exist at all, rather than be built on a foundation of lies.

[foreveryakone]

You really are an idealist. We'll never know, now, will we?

[qaunak]

You used to like my 'idealism'.

[She turns to him, looking into his eyes.] Do you love me?

[foreveryakone]

Do I what?

Would I have wasted the last years of my life with someone I didn't-- [ Hnn. He doesn't break eye contact, though his eyes narrow. ] ... care about?

[qaunak]

Say it. Just... please. I need to hear these words. [She looks right at him, awaiting a solid yes or no. Why she believes anything he says is anyone's guess.]

[foreveryakone]

I've said them to you countless times before. I can't imagine what difference it would make now.

[ Stalling. ]

It goes without saying.

[qaunak]

...you will never understand how things unspoken hurt those around you. But I now understand what it means to be cut so deep no tears can fall.

[She turns away, eyes fixed on the ground.] I hope this was all worth it to you, Yakone.

[foreveryakone]

I can't help it if you're determined to only see the bad in all of this.

[qaunak]

And I can't do anything for a man who can't feel love.

[foreveryakone]

Of course I loved you. I chose you, didn't I?

[qaunak]

Loved. Past tense.

And you still can't look me in the eye saying even that.

...when other couples reunite here, they kiss, they hug, they at least hold hands, and you...

[foreveryakone]

[ Now he does look at her, annoyed and weary. ]

What is it that you want? There's no point in playing games anymore. There's nothing left to keep us apart now.

[ Or together. ]

[qaunak]

I want you to be honest! You're the one who has played games, Yakone! I never lied to you, I defended you to our sons, I love you so much I would stay with you even now if you wanted me to, and you're still weighing options and holding words back? Do you think you have anything to lose anymore?

[Her voice drops from nearly yelling to a quieter, more resigned tone.] Do you really gain anything from your tricks at this point? Does it make any of this better? I love you, but I don't understand you, or why you won't let me in.

[foreveryakone]

No. There's nothing left to be lost.

[ He puts a hand on her shoulder. Man, he doesn't deserve a wife like her. ]

All there is to do is to start over. We could.

[qaunak]

We will. If we can find a game that takes us both, I'll be there. As confusing as you are, I know some of what we had was real. It meant something. I won't let us lose that, no matter what mistakes have been made.

I love you.

[foreveryakone]

I was lucky to find you. We won't lose anything more; not this time.