Forever homeless. orz

[thatched]

Hellooo laaadies, and gentlemen.

My mun put me in here without giving me much direction so I figure, might as well give some advice. Any kind of advice. Especially spiritual because, being dead at the moment, I feel like I'm pretty qualified. So lay it on me. If not, feel free to spill your troubles over booze, of which I have plenty.

Come one, come all!

Comments

1/2

[fierybluebird]

[.....]

[No words. Just creeping up. ]

2/2

[fierybluebird]

[And then phoenix pouncing. MWAHAHAHA. Fear the phoenix in your hair.]

[thatched]

[Nope. Nope. Totally obliviaaaah]

Damnit, Marco! Not the hair! [Tries to wrestle you off] You freaking blue chicken I'll mess you up!

[fierybluebird]

[Ahahahahahah. Nope. Can't budge him.]

Like to see you try!

[thatched]

Fine. I'll just drink all the booze and you can't have any. [Wags a bottle at him] Can't get your beak into this can you, bird brain?

[This is obviously the best idea. And just to make it epic, Because Whitebeard Revenge is always epic. He'll tilt his head back and drink two bottles at once.

Thirsty birdy?

Thirsty?

Well too bad!]

[fierybluebird]

[Oh. That's evil.]

[Okay. Marco hops off of Thatch's shoulders and fixes him with the cutest bird look he can.]

Please?

[thatched]

Aw okay.

[He can't resist that face. He holds up a bottle for you. He's still not sure how he's going to drink it as a bird which is probably just as well because it's laced with a sour ball. Hope you don't like your cheeks too much]

[fierybluebird]

[Switches back to human, because he's too lazy to get a straw. And starts drinking!]

[Oh.]

[Have a look.]

[thatched]

[Have a look back.

Yeah he knows.

What are going to do about it?]

[fierybluebird]

[Keeps drinking and kicks lightly in the face.]

[He loves you bro.]

[With his foot.]

[thatched]

[. . . ]

For some reason...

I have a chicken foot in my face.

[takes another sip]

You gonna fix that?

[fierybluebird]

Nope. [Pokes with his foot.]

This rum is disgusting by the way. [Deadpan forever.] Get it from the North Blue?

[thatched]

Got something against the North Blue? [sip sip. head tilting slightly from the poke]

[fierybluebird]

Yes. Their rum is always sour.

[Probably lying.]

[thatched]

Your mama's rum is sour.

[Definitely lying.]

[fierybluebird]

Is that what she told you last night?

[This would be more fail, but it's just so deadpan. Fight him.]

[thatched]

[He can just let that one slip by.

He'll push Marco's foot off and go to sit next to him, wrapping a brotherly arm around his shoulder]

No, no. Listen. I'm sure your mother was a lovely woman but insinuating that I slept with her is just bad on you. You should say something like

"Are you talking about my mother, bastard? Wanna fight?"

or even a fat Mama joke like...

"Your mamas so fat she can sail the Grand Line and New World at the same time"

[fierybluebird]

My Mom's rum is so sour because you can't satisfy her?

[.............. This isn't working Thatch. Give it up.]

[thatched]

Heh.

Heh heh.


Are you saying I can't satisfy any woman, you bastard?!

[And I hooope you like the sour rum because he's pretty much force feeding it to you at this point]

[fierybluebird]

[/Forced to drink and switches to phoenix!]

Cheep!

[thatched]

[Aww. He can't hurt you while you're like this, bro. Besides the fact that your beak makes it near impossible. But he will sort of flop on deck, using you as a pillow and completely non poutily inform you]

For your information I satisfy all the lucky women who come in contact with me. In fact, I'm kind of a master at it.

[fierybluebird]

[Whistles quietly.]

Is that so?

1/3

[mera_mera_ace]

(was strolling by, does a double take.)

Re: 2/3

[mera_mera_ace]

(Is confused a moment then realizes yes Thatch is alive, slowly starts to creep upon him)

3/3

[mera_mera_ace]

THATCH!!!!!!! (Now you have a back full of glomping little brother who has missed you ever so much!!!)


(Just imagine Thatch in the icon instead of Luffy)

[overcharging]

Are you even old enough to drink, little rookie?