AU bitty spiderman from Superfamily. I blame Tumblr.

[laterpeasants]

Mun? Is that your name? It seems kind of weird. When can I go home? Dad and Pop's are going to be worried. I mean they're Iron man and Captain America, they have to save people. It'll be harder for them to do that if they're worrying about me.

So, can I go home now?

[Look Peter, paper and crayons!]

Oh boy!

[And now he's distracted.]

Comments

How could I resist the adorable....

[like_a_gerbil]

[Grinning when he notices Peter and his crayons, he sits down next to him, watching him draw.]

It's okay if you stay with Mun sometimes. If we know where you are so we don't worry.

You can't, and I love you forever for it. I need some live action bitty peter icons though sob

[laterpeasants]

Oh, dad! You're here too!

[Well, he'll just stop drawing for now as he looks towards Steve.]

Really? You guys won't be worried?

I love superfamily so much. If his Tony was online I'd link them

[like_a_gerbil]

Yeah, I am. Both of us are but Pop will be here later.

It'd be like staying with Aunt Natasha or Uncle Clint. We'll know you're safe so it'll be okay.

[Though, if that wasn't the case... Well, did anyone really want to think about what would happen if something happened to Captain America and Iron Man's kid? Especially considering who the extended family was?]

Yeeees goooood i like this.

[laterpeasants]

Oh, okay!

[Well, Pete is glad to know that both his dads are here. It'd get lonely after all without them.]

Are Aunt Natasha and Uncle Clint here too?

[But no, we never think of that.]

[therealgenius]

I think the sign of any good parent is that their child is always on their mind. And since Tony can't think about anyone but himself...well.

[laterpeasants]

You're just jealous.

[therealgenius]

How old are you?

[WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THESE THINGS, KID? HUH?]

[laterpeasants]

I'm 7 and a half.

[Guess who got Tony's snark.]

[therealgenius]

I'm assuming Captain Rogers has been doing most of the raising, then.

[Because Tony can barely take care of himself from what Justin has seen. How is this kid not malnourished?]

[laterpeasants]

They raise equally! Pop's brought me to the zoo once.

[therealgenius]

Took. Took you.

[He's seven (and a half), shut up, Hammer.]

Which one's Pop?

[laterpeasants]

Tony's Pop. Steve is dad.

[therealgenius]

That's, huh. That's not what I expected. [Because Pop is so old-fashioned, but...

But Justin is not actually 100% dick all the time, and he didn't get where he is by berating children for having terrible parents, so he opts to squat down in order to get on his level.] What's your name?

[laterpeasants]

I'm Peter or Pete. My dads like to call me Pete.

[therealgenius]

[Simple. Not Old Testament, not Howard. Makes sense.]

I'm Justin. Hammer. [Look, his hands aren't all orange anymore, that was a one time thing. And while Tony's people skills are absolute suck, surely the kid knows how to shake hands, right?] I, uh. I work in the field your pop used to work in.

[laterpeasants]

[Ooooh, he's heard of you all right. Tony's made some very colourful remarks about you.

He does know how to shake hands but he's not going to. ]

Yeah, pop's said you tried to steal his Iron man suit.

[therealgenius]

[Wait, Tony talks about him? He warrants talking about? Be still his beating, envious little heart, this is great news!

In the most backwards sort of ways, but hey. He gets it. Kid doesn't like him. No issues there, he just takes his hand back and lets them dangle over his knees.]

Not steal, replicate. Uh—make one myself. It...didn't work out. At all. Kind of did the opposite of work out. Ruined a lot of things.

[laterpeasants]

[He's just going to stare at you silently for a little bit. Before he talks.]

You didn't ask for permission. Dad says you have to ask if you want to copy someone's idea.

[Dress it up however you like Justin, it's still stealing. :T]

[therealgenius]

That's not exactly true.

[How does he explain this to a kid when his father's been telling him otherwise?]

It's like...bottled water. Some companies have really fancy bottles, but other companies can have that same sort of bottle. It's kind of like that with technology. Or, it was. You have to have patents and copyrights and...paper stuff. God, how do I explain it? Okay, wait. Think of computers. You have all sorts of brands, but they're all computers, right? It's like that with all sorts of technology.

That and [they're cool] the government needed them, so. It didn't work out like anyone wanted it to, really.

[laterpeasants]

...

[That's confusing. You're confusing, Justin. He'll shake his head though as if to disagree.]

Pop's didn't want to make anymore weapons for people to hurt each other with.

[Or so that's what he's been told.]

[therealgenius]

[Tony and Steve have a kid. You're confusing, Peter.]

That's what he said. Still, there's wars to fight and he's only one man. I just stepped up to the task and did as best I could.

[laterpeasants]

[No, your confusing, Justin!]

Maybe people wouldn't have to fight if we made things to hurt each other with.

Cannt resist the thread jacking

[like_a_gerbil]

Mr. Hammer, I believe that it is impolite to say things like that about someone's father. [Protective of his husband and son? Just a little... Though Steve will keep his temper and attempt to be civil around Peter.]

everyone wants Hammer time

[therealgenius]

[On the one hand...Cap fanboy.

On the other hand...Tony.

God, his life is hard.]

If the kid's already thinking that Dad and Pop shouldn't be worried about him at all, I think he's already figured out that Tony's a self-absorbed d—jerk.

I almost feel sorry for him...

[like_a_gerbil]

[It'd be smarter to remember the Cap fanboy idea than his dislike for Tony.

Steve gives Hammer a warning look at that verbal slip. Not even Fury gets away with cursing in front of Steve's son.]

Actually, he was thinking that we would be worried about him while his mundane suggested differently. He wanted to go home so we wouldn't wonder what happened.

[The words are followed by a thoughtful pause before Steve adds.] Do you think I'd have a child with someone like that?

I-I'm actually a boy ;^; Also you can ignore this.

[laterpeasants]

[Well, Pete will just stand here and watch Dad be a badass, don't mind him. ]

[puny_parker]

Welp, this is extremely bizarre.

[laterpeasants]

How come?

[puny_parker]

You're a tiny me. Not only that, you're a tiny me being raised by Steve and Tony. What about Aunt May and Uncle Ben?

they call it au for a reason sadly.

[laterpeasants]

A tiny you?

[There's a pause, he's not sure what you mean there, but the mun says there's lots of hims around here so he'll go with it.

As for Aunt May and Uncle Ben....]

....they died.

[you_have_heart]

You have to be careful around these Mun people. They are most strange.

[He doesn't have a soft spot for children at all. Nope.]

[laterpeasants]

My mun doesn't seem too bad, Mr.Loki.

[But can you tell the kid may be a little uncomfortable around you? You did try and wipe out New York after all.]

[you_have_heart]

Well, you are rather lucky then

[Hey that was...a few years ago...He hasn't destroyed anything major for a while.

Oh look, the couch is now jello]

[laterpeasants]

I guess so, huh?

[OHHH JELLO!]

Oh wow! Did you do that?

[So cool...but he's not sure if Pop's or dad will like that their couch is now a pile of jello.]

[you_have_heart]

Possibly.

[He smirks. Tony can buy a new couch. He's rather pleased with himself that he was able to keep the jello in the shape of the loveseat.]