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happy birthday rachel!!
Oh, what's this? I hope you do not expect me to say a word of thanks when it took some media website to remind you of my birthday. A rushed, thoughtless, crass piece of work like this is less like a greeting of well wishes and more akin to the hurried begging of one who knows they ought to be punished.
If you truly wish to make up for actually forgetting my birthday, I expect much more out of you, dear mundane. I am far too bored as it is, so do hurry on and make a few real plans.
If you truly wish to make up for actually forgetting my birthday, I expect much more out of you, dear mundane. I am far too bored as it is, so do hurry on and make a few real plans.

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