[Canon is the SCP Foundation. For Ink City's 4th Wall Event.] Commencing epic fail in 3...

[amajorchord]

So you're asking yourself: "What the fuck am I doing?" Which is the multimillion dollar question here. But whatever it is, the answer is no.

Honestly, you should have something better to do with your time than Photoshop a third eye onto a man who looks nothing like me for an event that's a month away.

[It sounds bad when you say it like that. Besides, it's your fault for having three eyes in the first place.]

Hey. Don't hate me because I have dubious properties attributed to myself.

Comments

[nagant]

Well, hate to break your streetlight, pal, but when the dead start not staying dead and reality starts not playing by the hells-damned rules, somebody's gotta deal with it.

...Yeah, deliv-men tend to show up at the most random times.

[amajorchord]

Oh, I know. It kind of helps to sink in when you're immortal yourself and one of your researchers is currently in the body of an orangutan.

It really doesn't help that we're supposed to be secret. Nor does it help the occasional fantasy of running through the hallways slicing everyone to ribbons with a straight razor.

[nagant]

[Whut.] ...You lost me. You're what and somebody else is stuck as a what?!

Yeah, uh, better not say that kinda thing out loud. People tend to shun you.

[amajorchord]

It's a long story. You learn not to ask questions after a while.

Say what out loud?