Homeless

[handoften]

You do understand that I have other things I could be doing, yeah? Those circuits in my TARDIS are not going to fix themselves, and you know how she gets when she's broken. It's not like dealing with the Doctor's TARDIS. You know this. She has no problems in expressing her upset.

I'm an evil metacrisis. You trying to explain all the ins and outs, while entertaining, is taking a long time. Meanwhile, there's a Doctor somewhere out there feeling superior that I could be tormenting. What about a Jack? No Koschei's. I've had my fill of 'hand' jokes. Come on. I'm bored.

Comments

[ofdrumsthesound]

What, don't you like me?

[handoften]

[The things he does to keep the peace. Drawing a candybar from his inner pocket, he tosses it over.]

No, I don't. Goodbye.

[ofdrumsthesound]

*He sighs, but takes the candy bar.* See you around. Or not.

Thanks for the snack.

[justthedoctor]

Wh-evil??? Oi, I left you with Rose so you wouldn't turn out this way! What'd you do???

[handoften]

[Well now. Who might this be? Options get cut down since only four people were there, and this man doesn't look like Donna.]

And you are?

[If Theta felt a god, any god, would listen to the likes of him, he would be praying that this lanky, not ginger, badly dressed man is not who he thinks it is.]

[justthedoctor]

[Don't mind him if he looks at you like you're a bit of a dunce.] Who do you think??? [He points at his face] New face. Happened not long after I left you on Bad Wolf Bay. You should have figured it out.

[And then he steps up in your personal bubble and stares right in your face. You don't mind, right? He never had any concept of personal space, and he would assume that stands true for you, Handy-hand-clone-thing.]

Real question is, what went wrong with you??? I left you with Rose because she kept me from ging over the deep end, so why didn't it work on you??? [And he's just gonna buzz you with the Sonic now and study the results for a moment.] Surely it wasn't the Donna bits of you! She was my best mate! Perfect match, really. Though maybe that's it. Poor woman underestimates herself too much, an' we both know how much we like ourselves. Is that it? Depressed Donna and Self-hating Doctor makes evil Doctor-copy?

[And then he steps back and stares again, like a thought just occurred to him. And leans in again and whispers conspiratorily.]

you don't call yourself The Valeyard now, do you...?

[handoften]

[Theta has gotten pretty used to being stared at that way. What he doesn't like is the whole getting too close thing. A step back makes that bearable. Unlike most, Theta just stands there and lets the Doctor get it out of his system instead of trying to interrupt. That would be far too much like attempting to shout at a storm to stop it from turning.]

So we regenerated into a gangly not-ginger college professor sort. Wonderful. Could be worse, I suppose. Could have Nine's ears again.

[Pardon the small shudder there.]

Wrong. Wrong. And Wrong. I'm not The Valeyard. That was a bug or so I heard.

[There's a stillness to Theta that Doctor lacks, an ability to watch as a wolf about to cull the weakest from a herd would. He can be the eye of the storm instead of its unending motion. Was it worth it to explain when he had a mundane to convince to find him a game? Probably not. Still, the Doctor was better than boredom.]

Go back to the most basic question, Doctor: Can a human Time Lord metacrisis exist and why or why not?