RE: TMI meme.

[lastmanstanding]

I am supposed to be sober. Sober.

Who the hell is Haymitch Abernathy and why do I need to go get drunk with him?

Comments

[hungover]

So long as you're providing alcohol, I think that can be arranged.

[lastmanstanding]

You that poor?

I'm not supposed to be drinking on that damn barge. Pray your writer doesn't send you there. [pours two glasses] seriously fucking pray.

[obliviousescort]

[SOMEONE IS WATCHING FROM THE CORNER BEING VERY DISAPPROVING.

VERY.]

[hungover]

[Pointedly ignoring her unless she says anything about it?

Check.

Talking about her like she's not there?

Also check.]

[lastmanstanding]

[Snort] where did you get the hairdo.

[obliviousescort]

[MORE DISAPPROVING. And a "hmpf" before she snaps:]

Manners. Honestly.

[lastmanstanding]

It looks like something you'd see at like...a wedding in the eighties.

[obliviousescort]

How charming of you. I see they never taught proper manners in the past either.... What a shame.

[lastmanstanding]

Lady.

[Disgusted drunk face] Your head is pink and shiny. And I'm a cop I don't have to have manners.

[obliviousescort]

[God, she can hardly handle one drunk.... And now she has to deal with two? So much glaring at you, sir. So much. At least she knows how to handle Haymitch.]

How unfortunate.

[lastmanstanding]

...What?

That I'm a cop? I'm a good cop. I was a decent person! ..No I am a decent person!

[hungover]

Oh, I don't think you need to worry about her.

[What's that, Haymitch thinks that he's successfully manipulating the people around him?]

And maybe I just don't like to pay for my own drinks.

[lastmanstanding]

...Is this your girlfriend? [He waves] Your hair is awesome. Classy yet punk rock. nice.

[bottle tilt] Be careful that's tequila. And it's fucking good tequila.

[hungover]

Careful. Are you going to lick it off the table?

[He'd pay to see that, honestly. Haymitch laughs roughly at the mention of Effie, though.]

Oh, I'm way out of her league.

[lastmanstanding]

Classy fucker? [Good job. Hoffman raises his shotglass] to being out of everybody's fucking league.

Seriously they'll make you stop drinking and throw painful shit at you. Just don't come.

[hungover]

I'm failing to understand how that's different from home.

[He raises his own shot in return and then downs it quickly. They were trying to dry him out in District 13, too.]

[lastmanstanding]

...What's it like? Your home?

[hungover]

Well, if you want to be real specific about it -- it's a pile of ash.

[obliviousescort]

[Effie's eyes widen. DON'T LICK IT OFF THE MAHOGANY SERIOUSLY. Except she's too busy nearly flailing. Girlfriend? SHE WOULD NEVER... AND OUT OF HER LEAGUE?!

Her lips purse. Srsly, Haymitch. Breathing fire right now if she could.]

In what world would that be, Haymitch? HM?

[hungover]

[The last time that he saw her he was fairly sure she was going to be thrown into prison by the Capitol. He's definitely not just overcompensating for the fact he might've been concerned about her.]

Oh, you wouldn't know about it. Capitol citizens look right past it.

[obliviousescort]

[..... Yes, well.... She's from just before that, so she can't imagine why he'd be acting this way. It's like he's trying extra hard to push her buttons...

But she just makes a face at his comment.]

Right... We look past it because it's in your head, isn't it?

[hungover]

[He sloshes his drink as he motions toward her with a smirk.]

You're so good to me.

[hijackedbread]

The one where Katniss is setting the world on fire.

[hungover]

If we want to get technical, that was the Capitol.

[...at first, at least.]

[hijackedbread]

Because of what she did.