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voice test
NO NO NO, MUNDANE, NO.
I WAS FINE SULKING IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD. YOU SHOULD LEAVE ME THERE.
IT'S INCREDIBLY DISORIENTING TO BE SUDDENLY PLUCKED FROM THE JAWS OF NEAR-NONEXISTENCE AND THRUST INTO THE LIMELIGHT WITH ICONS AND MY OWN SPACE AND SHIT TO DEAL WITH FLYING AT ME FROM ALL DIRECTIONS.
WHAT'S YOUR WORD FOR IT? INHUMANE? IT'S THAT, BUT WORSE, BECAUSE IT INVOLVES TROLLS, AND AS WE ALL KNOW WE ARE A SUPERIOR SPECIES SO NOT ONLY IS IT CRUEL BUT IT IS DEGRADING TO BOOT.
I'M NOT A TOY. SOMEONE FIND A LABEL GUN AND LABEL MY HEAD SO THIS PAN-DAMAGED WIGGLER KNOWS NOT TO FUCK AROUND. "KARKAT VANTAS. MADE IN AN ECTO-LAB. NOT A TOY."
ACTUALLY, ADD "CHOKING HAZARD", AS WELL, BECAUSE THERE IS A RISING DANGER OF ME CHOKING MY MUNDANE TO DEATH.
AND DON'T THINK I HAVEN'T NOTICED YOU TRYING TO MAKE EVERYTHING ON MY JOURNAL VERY SLIGHTLY PINK, EITHER. IT'S NOT FUNNY AND IT LOOKS HORRIBLE. STOP.
I WAS FINE SULKING IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD. YOU SHOULD LEAVE ME THERE.
IT'S INCREDIBLY DISORIENTING TO BE SUDDENLY PLUCKED FROM THE JAWS OF NEAR-NONEXISTENCE AND THRUST INTO THE LIMELIGHT WITH ICONS AND MY OWN SPACE AND SHIT TO DEAL WITH FLYING AT ME FROM ALL DIRECTIONS.
WHAT'S YOUR WORD FOR IT? INHUMANE? IT'S THAT, BUT WORSE, BECAUSE IT INVOLVES TROLLS, AND AS WE ALL KNOW WE ARE A SUPERIOR SPECIES SO NOT ONLY IS IT CRUEL BUT IT IS DEGRADING TO BOOT.
I'M NOT A TOY. SOMEONE FIND A LABEL GUN AND LABEL MY HEAD SO THIS PAN-DAMAGED WIGGLER KNOWS NOT TO FUCK AROUND. "KARKAT VANTAS. MADE IN AN ECTO-LAB. NOT A TOY."
ACTUALLY, ADD "CHOKING HAZARD", AS WELL, BECAUSE THERE IS A RISING DANGER OF ME CHOKING MY MUNDANE TO DEATH.
AND DON'T THINK I HAVEN'T NOTICED YOU TRYING TO MAKE EVERYTHING ON MY JOURNAL VERY SLIGHTLY PINK, EITHER. IT'S NOT FUNNY AND IT LOOKS HORRIBLE. STOP.
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though you knoww not doin anythin is just as bad as doin anythin
in fact you knoww wwhat kar it might be more a case of doomed if you do doomed if you dont
this place just sorta fuckin sucks an by means a bein made a journal for an evverythin alone is wwhat makes you screwwed no matter wwhat your mun decides to do
1/2
BUT, DUE TO MY TRADEMARK BRAND OF SHITTY LUCK, HERE I AM.
AAAND HERE YOU ARE.
HERE WE BOTH ARE.
2/2
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if i actually had some means a kickin myself right outta this wwhole bullshit inferior human non flarpin rp journal thing id a done it already
its been nothin but months a shit an i vvery wwell dont appreciate any of it
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MIND-BOGGLING AS IT IS, THE YOU IN HERE WITH ME FEELS THE EXACT SAME WAY. AND SO DO I.
ISN'T THIS LOVELY.
WE SHOULD START A CLUB.
"MY LIFE IS A DISASTER OF PUPPETRY CLUB". WE'LL HAVE OUR OWN SHIRTS. THE MEETUPS INVOLVE STANDING AROUND LOOKING DISILLUSIONED IN THE GENERAL DIRECTION OF OUR MUNDANES.
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you nevver knoww maybe kan might be wwillin to make some shirts though you knoww for obvvious reasons youll havve to try askin her considerin wwe aint on the best a terms an all
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TO BE HONEST, THOUGH, I THINK MAYBE SHE'S JUST TIRED OF EVERYONE'S SHIT.
I WOULDN'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
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maybe one day wwe can actually do somethin wwith it
put it on the backburner for a little wwhile
sounds good dont you reckon
an i dunno she sure dont SEEM like its just a general sorta thing
did she tell you it wwas or somethin is that howw you knoww or
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NO, SHE DIDN'T. SHE HASN'T BEEN TALKING THROUGH THIS STUFF WITH ME. THERE HAVE BEEN UNCHARACTERISTICALY FEW DISCUSSIONS ABOUT EMOTIONS AND FEELINGS LATELY.
WHICH IS WHY I THINK IT'S PROBABLY JUST HER BEING SICK OF EVERYONE'S SHIT.
I MEAN.
AREN'T YOU?
...ALTHOUGH DON'T GET ME WRONG, YOU STILL FUCKED UP. EVERYONE AND THEIR LUSUS IS PISSED ABOUT THAT.
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Fuck it, he'll take that as a compliment.]
wwell yeah i get that ivve gotten the wwhole eridan youre a bastard wwhat the fuck routine from evveryone already wwhatevver it sure gets on the old nervves like drowwnin does for a landdwweller
but youre definitely handlin it the best kar see wwere just havvin a polite bout a banter reminiscent a before murders an race doomins
wwhy exactly evveryone else cant just movve the fuck on about it already is beyond me especially wwhen its been so long since it happened anywway
good to see youre still the reliable one
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THE ONLY REASON I'M CUTTING YOU ANY SLACK ABOUT IT WHATSOEVER IS BECAUSE I FIGURED THAT WAS THE CASE. REITERATING THE SAME OLD SHIT EVERYONE ELSE HAS ALREADY TRIED AND FAILED TO HAMMER INTO YOUR ASS-BACKWARDS THINK-PAN ISN'T GOING TO ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING OTHER THAN GIVING THE BOTH OF US MIGRAINES.
PEOPLE CAN'T JUST "MOVE ON" BECAUSE THAT'S NOT A VERY FUCKING LEGITIMATE THING FOR ANYONE TO DO CONSIDERING WHAT HAPPENED.
YOU DESERVE EVERY VENOMOUSLY-WORDED LECTURE YOU GET, AND IF YOU DON'T REALISE THAT BY NOW, YOU SHOULD.
SO DON'T GET AHEAD OF YOURSELF. I STILL FUCKING HATE YOUR SORRY BEHIND FOR WHAT YOU DID, AND SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE. YOU ARE NOT A VERY POPULAR TROLL RIGHT NOW.
[A pause while he lets that sink in.]
BUT YOU'RE RIGHT, I AM THE LEVEL-HEADED ONE.
AND THAT'S WHY I'LL STILL BEGRUDGINGLY ADMIT THAT YOU'RE MY FRIEND.
WHEN PUSHED.
WITH A RED-HOT FIRE-TENDING IMPLEMENT.
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i wwasnt exactly a popular troll before this shit it wwas literally like all i had wwas just you an kan from the moment the game wwent ahead an onwwards considerin fef pretty much ABANDONED me for that pissblood
plus kan wwas too busy dealin wwith her human redcrush eitherwway so i barely got any chances a speakin wwith her so she may as wwell a not been there at all
then a course stuff happened but you knoww you wwere the only troll in that computer room i didnt shoot an here you are provvin i pretty much wwas right in doin so
if itd been any different troll i doubt id be gettin this kinda leewway from any of em
so this is kinda nice you knoww
change a pace you might say
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YOU MADE THINGS RIDICULOUSLY HARD FOR YOURSELF EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO SHIFT ALL THE BLAME ONTO THE OTHERS.
AND STOP TALKING ABOUT THAT. WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT THE COMPUTER ROOM INCIDENT UNTIL YOU REALISE HOW UTTERLY IN THE WRONG YOU WERE. AND MAYBE UNTIL I STOP FEELING LIKE I'M GOING TO THROW UP WHENEVER THE TOPIC COMES UP IN CONVERSATION.
BUT WHATEVER, YOU ALREADY GOT YOUR PATHETIC SCRAP OF REASSURANCE FROM ME THAT YOU'RE NOT SOCIALLY DOOMED FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY. TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT.
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fuck
so wwhats up wwith you anyhoww do you evven got any plans as such or does your mun evven
or is this just one a those one time things
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WELL, I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW. I HEAR FROM THE OTHER MUSES MOST OF THEIR MENTAL EXERCISE COMES FROM HANGING AROUND DEAR_MUN LIKE DELINQUENTS AROUND AN IMPERIAL PUBLIC TRANSPORT WAITING SHACK.
SO I GUESS I'LL PROBABLY BE ROPED INTO DOING THAT FOR A WHILE. REST ASSURED; I WON'T ENJOY IT.
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you could be put into an actual game an thats nothin but heartbreak an strife
real heavy sort of emotional toils an strained relationships you can barely keep track of
not to mention havvin the wworst twwo roommates to havve evver been hatched
okay maybe that last parts a bit more personal but trust me it all applies one wway or another
enjoy just bein an occasional d_m post wwhile you can
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ONE OF THE OTHER MUSES IS IN A GAME AND HE SEEMS TO BE HAVING A PERFECTLY JOLLY TIME OF IT.
I HEAR HE'S ABOUT OUR AGE, TOO.
WHAT I'M SAYING IS I'M SURE IT CAN'T BE THAT BAD. BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I GET WHAT YOU MEAN. RATHER HERE THAN THERE.
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must be nice bein wwithin shoutin distance of someone you actually like
so good for him wwhatevver
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even a2 a troll youre 2tiill the 2ame
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USING BASIC LOGIC I CAN ONLY ASSUME YOU ARE SUBTLY REFERRING TO THE FACT THAT THERE IS AN INEXPLICABLY HUMAN ME. I BET HE'S A RIOT.
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a2 far a2 my mun tell2 me every troll ha2 a human counterpart in my uniiver2e
though 2ome thiing2 are diifferent though
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DARE I ASK WHAT OTHER "DATA" YOU'VE GATHERED ABOUT UNIVERSAL DIFFERENCES, OR WOULD THAT WRONGLY BE GIVING THE IMPRESSION THAT I GIVE A SHIT?
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but for diifference2 ii gue22 you dont need to giive a 2hiit for me to tell you one
my name ii2 lux captor not 2ollux
ii have a twiin brother named 2ol who account2 for the other half of the name of the troll you know
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SO WHAT ABOUT ME, AM I PREDICTABLE TOO? IF YOU DON'T SAY DASHINGLY ATTRACTIVE WITH THE BEST LEADERSHIP SKILLS EVER I WILL ASSUME YOU ARE LYING.
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except for the fact the Karkat from my uniiver2e ii2 albiino
whiich iif you diidnt know ii2 a rare phy2iical difference between human2 that ii2 often o2traciized by a22hole2
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I REALLY LIKE HOW THE UNIVERSE SEEMS TO TAKE GREAT PLEASURE OUT OF FUCKING ME OVER EVERY CHANCE IT GETS.
REALLY APPRECIATE THAT.
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then again youre the only one who can handle that guy when he 2top2 takiing hii2 mediicatiion
then agaiin eriidan de2erved to get beaten
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STILL, I HOPE I BROKE THAT SHIT UP. IF YOUR GAMZEE IS ANYTHING LIKE THE GAMZEE I KNOW, I WOULDN'T WISH HIM ON ANYONE.
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whiich iis pretty amaziing when eriidan pushed tavro2 down a 2et of 2taiir2
though apparently you calmed gamzee down by throwiing a piie at hiim
at lea2t that2 what john told me
my gue22 ii2 iit had hiis mediicatiion iin iit
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( ...... goes to check journal. )
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OH COME ON
[Glares pointedly at fourth wall. He is so not happy at his mun right now.]
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I THINK MY MUNDANE IS GETTING A KICK OUT OF LAUGHING AT ME.
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I'M STICKING WITH DRAB AND DREARY.
PROVIDED SHE'LL TAKE HER HEAD OUT OF HER WASTE CHUTE LONG ENOUGH TO COMPLY.
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I 8et your mundane would loooooooove for you to 8e quiet for once right?
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UNFORTUNATELY THEY HAVE FALLEN ON MY EARS ONLY, AND I CAN STATE WITH ALL CERTAINTY THAT YOU ARE AN IMMENSE TOOL.
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First Its Being Said I Would Deny A Reasonable Clothing Creation Request
This Is Entirely Untrue
I Have Nothing Better To Do At Most Times After All
Second
This Idea That I Have Red Feelings For The Seer Of Light
I Dont Know Where This Confusion Comes From
But Its Slander To Both Parties
Third
My Perceived Reluctance To Discuss Emotions With You
I Would Be Perfectly Willing If You Were Not Conciliationally Involved With Another Troll
Particularly
The One Youve Chosen
But As It Is You Are So Platonic Discussions No Longer Seem Available To Me
Finally You Seem To Believe Your Powerlessness Is Complete And Your Mundane Cannot Be Influenced In Any Way At All
But This Is Very Untrue And You Just Need A Little Practice
Thats All