dear_mun | On the mun applying his derpy reboot double at vatheon.

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On the mun applying his derpy reboot double at vatheon.

Trapped in a city under the sea... what better fate for one so thoroughly captivated by the deep blue?

Not that I am not the same way. In fact... I must confess that some part of me, evidently a petty one, is jealous that he will be allowed to witness something so beautiful, while I will not. Then again, I recognize that he needs time with earthlings even more than I do. They will teach him what he will never learn from this... Zartas individual's books.

The great Zartas' teachings are all that any Evronian needs, you blasphemous scientist.

... Ah, here we go again. I say that the true blasphemy is thinking that Evron could ever produce true poets.

- Branch Chief Gorthan

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There's always a silver lining - maybe by being in such a beautiful place, he can become more appreciative of it like you!

Ah, so I see you're plagued by one, too, then.

[although his is less of a derpy reboot double and more of an abomination unto logic itself. also intelligence. he's a major insult to intelligence. he doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence as intelligence, lest he offend the concept.]

Yes, I am. And I do not know what to think, quite honestly. The physical similarity is certainly striking, and our genomes cannot be that far apart, and yet... as soon as he opens his mouth, I realize he and I could not be more different. It appears he was not even born into the same caste as I was. It is rather fascinating.

Also, in terms of hierarchy, I am his inferior. That... is something I do not feel entirely comfortable about, to be completely honest.

Mine was reinstated to the military and given a promotion, despite the fact that every time he opens his mouth, pure, unadulterated stupidity falls out.

Let's just say I understand your situation rather well.

I do indeed hope that it will be so, Minnie. He is a man who has not had enough poetry in his life, in spite of what he is so fond of claiming.

I know that his heart is capable of feeling emotions, much like mine is. He only needs to learn to embrace them.

That's the right spirit! I'm sure he can change his ways. I believe in him... he's still you, one way or another. I wish I could be of further help, but all of my 'counterparts' are just... less mature versions of myself.

You have doubles, too? What are they like?

He was given a promotion after... the same thing you did?

[If he had eyebrows, he'd be quirking one right now.]

That could take a while to explain... All the different comics, all the different cartoons, there could be dozens of me, according to my mundane.

[Contemplates...]

Well, one of my mudane's favorites is where I'm a princess of France. I'm much, much younger, and I believe she's a bit more obsessed with romance than her actual royal duties. I don't have any magic, but this time I actually am royal blood, and that time it's Mickey who is the commoner... my bodyguard, in fact.

He was granted full exoneration from his crimes, and a promotion to Lieutenant Colonel upon his reinstatement to the military based on the grounds that he was "wrongfully imprisoned, and subjected to human experimentation as a result of said imprisonment." The story goes that he made some sort of escape from his confines and alerted the military to cruelty that was happening in one of the laboratories adjacent to Central Prison.

All lies, of course; you can thank my current traveling partner for perpetuating them. Apparently he's rather fond of the idiot.

So that is what Archer's deal is. I see.

Such an elaborate lie, all for a fool's sake... And you have nobody willing to go those lengths for you, even if you are a much more valuable asset?

Oh, I have a different arrangement entirely, and even if there were those willing to do such a thing, I can't say that I would want them to. I have far more freedom to do as I like this way, you see.

It's just the principle of the thing.

Right. Your loyalties.

[He sighs.]

My double has taken the place of the Evronian Emperor, though he retains the title of Imperial Councillor. ... Let us just say that power has gone to his head in some rather unfortunate ways. He believes he is fulfilling a prophecy of sorts. Much like Macbeth, when one thinks about it... not to mention that there are rumors that he personally did away with the Emperor.

How curious that you should have so many other selves. Perhaps I should deem myself fortunate to only have one.

Do you personally get along with yours?

Oh yes. We all have so many things in common, after all. [teeheehee.]

But I really can't imagine being anyone but me, and despite what hopes we have for your counterpart, I like 'this' you much better.

... I am flattered, Minnie. Truly flattered.

[... Even too flattered. Dear Evron, he hopes he's not going to crush on you next. Because that would be really weird. And inappropriate.]

[And hilarious. I mean yes, weird.]

Let's see, what else, what else.... There's a white-furred version of me who tries to keep a world of monsters in line... Another princess whose entire kingdom was turned to stone... Another princess who hides with a theater troupe... I wonder why I'm royalty so much. It's almost dull.

[NOT FOR HIM ;; *sobs*]

I see that perhaps my assumption that you were born royalty wasn't so wrong, after all.

Well, if you want to know the truth...

[glances around.]

... The games don't exactly say whether I am or not. My mundane deemed this 'headcanon' because she thought it would be more romantic, and I certainly like it! But she's been wrong about this kind of thing before.

I see. It is unfortunate that that particular point is not as clear as it perhaps should be. But that interpretation of things is truly romantic, indeed.

... And all of your other selves are together with alternates of your husband...?

Of course! For every Minnie, there's a Mickey! It's like destiny says we belong together. But for some reason, there are only two of us married to him, myself included.

[...oh, well. That actually sounds legitimately awesome, hang on; well done, derpy!]

...if you're expecting disapproval, I'm afraid you're looking in the wrong place entirely.

Oh, but I am far from being done.

At one point he was about to conquer Earth so thoroughly, all he had left to do was order his subordinate Zoster to press a switch on some form of remote control, and then all of Planet Earth would have been his to do as he pleased.

... But his gaze happened to fall on the beauty of Earth's blue oceans. And a moment later he was hysterically yelling at Zoster not to press the switch and order full retreat instead.

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On the mun applying his derpy reboot double at vatheon.

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herp derp forgot christmas carol

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