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re: Writing App for ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
lostrealm
If you're going to take this long to write the thing, you might as well not app at all. I really doubt anyone gives a flying fuck that you want to be like some sort of Sherlock shithead and look at every last detail before you start typing.
Seriously, Mun. It's like you and that mental girl Lucy are the same person, all obsessive and creepy and shit.
Seriously, Mun. It's like you and that mental girl Lucy are the same person, all obsessive and creepy and shit.
YEEEEEEEEEES /insert sea-witch Ursula laugh here
CAPESBUTS.]True. Like how Kelly seems like a total chav, but she's actually a good friend. We'll see about the "good traits", though. I might end up raining on a goody's parade if there's too many of them.
[But Pete, cussing is fun! Go on, give it a go. It's so deliciously freeing.]
spiders > octopi tbh
A goody? What's a goody?
[Peter has issues with that word, okay. He has issues with lots of things, but "goody two-shoes" is a big insult in his book. Forgive him :c]
They both have 8 legs and are therefore equally creepy in my book. BUNNIES, HOWEVER...
[Alisha rolls her eyes. Yeah. Being brainwashed by Jessica was not... exactly the best thing that ever happened to her. Good thing she can't remember being her personal zombie.
Sorry, Peter... she doesn't mean to insult you, it's just that she's had some nasty experiences of her own.]
put two together and you get eight more in a week. CREEPY BREEDING FIENDS
and crying, probablyand his life-long love being busy all the time. Peter doesn't have time to get down, unfortunately.]I didn't realize being a goody two-shoes meant you did everything for Jesus. [This is a revelation.] I'd like to think you could be a goody just because...you're good. Part of who you are.
Yes, but it's an adorable multitude of legs
[Which... yanno. Most cops and probation workers fall under that latter category.]
are you calling spider-man ugly
...or if they hid that his uncle's killer wasn't who he killed.
...or if the chief's daughter interrupted the date he was going to propose to Mary Jane and mucked things up.
Or or or...]
Then maybe you shouldn't call her a goody so much as a...what you just said.
[NO CURSING FROM PETER!!]
no. he has a bunnyface. therefore he is good.
It's not like it matters whether I call her a goody or not. She can't care... wot, with being all dead and the like.
[That might have been said a little too casually. Aaaand she still might be missing the point.
TRY IT, YOU MIGHT LIKE IT.]
i hope that's the only bunny-like thing he has
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to, uh, speak ill of the dead. Unless they're like, I dunno, uh...Hitler. Or Stalin. Or...Vlad the Impaler, Mao...Nero...with his fiddle, I think you could say crap about Nero.
yeaaah, I can't think of anything else bunny-like. Unless his hair is super soft. Is it?
Trust me, if you knew her, you'd speak shit about her too. [Trufax.]
maybe. it's possible. it seems poofy, at least.
Well, maybe you just shouldn't [if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all] talk about her. I mean, she's dead, right? It's not like she can, uh...be not dead. Around you.
would it be sexual harassment if i said i wanted to touch it?
...Alright, alright, you have a good point. Guess it's not exactly good karma or whatever it's called to be smacktalking her... even if she was a total bitch and probably deserves it.
i don't know will his GOOD HEART OF GOODNESS counteract your sex powers?
Yeah, and it weighs you down in the end. You know what they say, that hating someone doesn't do anything to them and does everything to you. Makes you hurt and get angry when there's...really not much you can do about it.
...there's only one way to find out. FOR SCIENCE!
...You're really good at that whole "positive wisdom" thing. Are you a public speaker or something? [Believe it or not, she's actually impressed.]
AS LONG AS YOU PROMISE NOT TO DO ANYTHING WITH HIM IF IT DOES he is so pure [deadcat]
Not in my day job, exactly. I've given some before, though. [Yanno, as Spider-Man. Mostly thumbs up while being upside down and kisses and girlfriend issues, but hey! He's a man of the people, he knows what to do and when to do it.
Unless there's. Aliens. That take over his suit. It's complicated okay okay.] I'm really just a college student, I think.
[that
is
bullshit]
no worries. i'll just pet him and love him and feed him apple pie and take him for walks
You should write a book or something. That stuff's pretty fucking deep.
[Welp, she wasn't expecting he was just a student.] Really? All you do is go to university, and you're able to spout out shit like Confucius? Shit, sign me up to study abroad.
[Not that her old grades are good enough to let her, but hey; here she thought that American universities didn't teach anything. Stereotypes and all.]
THE ULTIMATE WEAKNESS FOR ANY TRUE AMERICAN HERO!
IIIII...Confucius? No, he was...Eastern. I mean, he had some good thoughts, sure, but there was— [PETER STOP. Take a breath. No1curr] It's all my Uncle Ben, probably. He raised me, couldn't ask for a better guy. Really. I've just had a lot of good people [and good people that went bad 8888(] in my life. You know, learn what you can and make sure you take the good parts and...use them. Find the okay in everything, even if it seems like it's mostly crap.
That's how I killed Cap. And by killed, I mean "made him enjoy a delcious dessert."
[Geeze, Peter. Stop being so humble. It's getting increasingly difficult to be a bitch around you. >:|]
And who knows, maybe one day I'll actually take your advice, yeah?
[But today is not that day. The stars are not aligned properly. Stars. Can't do it.]
BUT WHY THO
[Stars. Peter knows stars! He used to lay in a web in central park with his lady and...oh no sads.
BUT SUDDENLY he remembers this is "meta" and why is he trying to hide it? It doesn't matter.]
I don't—I don't usually talk like this without a mask on. [This is a bit odd, still. But.] I'm...Spider-Man.
I DO WHAT I WAAAAAAANT
...Yeah, you should really just stick with the motivational shit, mate. Comedy really isn't your thing.
[Sorry, Peter, but... you're a movie character where she's from. In fact, Curtis used one of your lines to break up with his ex.]
IT'S ALWAYS THE ENGLISH!!! WE BROKE AWAY OVER 200 YEARS AGO STAAAWP
Is this where you tell me I'm a movie character or comics or something?
NO THIS IS PATRICK
[Alisha can't help but jump; the shock and disbelief is blatantly apparent in her features.]
And yeah, it was supposed to be. Shit...
STEWART? DON'T TRY TO HIDE YOUR NOT-SO-SECRET PLANS!
I get that. A lot. [A flick of the wrist and that hardcore awesome line of never-ending spider webbing (where does it all come from?? NO ONE KNOWS) flops to the ground. It'll decay and stuff, it's not everlasting.] Didn't really, you know, tell people? But here it's...different.
Fine. Not only don't you get to go into the Avengers, no X-Men or Enterprise for you either. >:|
[She needs a moment.
Okay, moment's up.]
So you're seriously the real deal?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THIS IS NOT FAIR
[He pauses for a moment, thinking it over, puzzling out all the options and variables leading up to it.]
You can touch them, if you want. See them, here? [Just the tiniest of slits in his arms, unnoticeable completely unless pointed out, which he doesn't mind doing.] That's where it comes out of.
you have brought this upon yourself.
Trust me, it's something neither of us wants.
[Nooo touchy. Because touchy means her power gets to be shared. And this time, show and tell is NOT a good idea.]
by having a bunnyface???
For insulting all that is Patrick. And Stewart.
/colbertfreakoutgif
>:3
so cruel
<3