Kronk has an epiphany

[squeak_squeaker]

Hey... mun. Mun lady.

I just had a big thought! [Kronk gasped, before smiling brightly.] Yeah, I know! Doesn't happen very often. But it's a great one... I think it's the best thought I ever had! Real important stuff too. Okay, here it comes:

What if I don't speak squirrel, but squirrels SPEAK KRONK?

Yeah. That's...uh. Something else, huh? So much for all those Yzma people who think I'm kinda dumb! [He beamed at whoever was listening, clearly proud of himself.] Would a dumb guy come up with something as great as that? I don't think so. Hah. He'd probably think squirrels can't talk... because he's dumb. But I'm smart!

Smart... Kronk. Yeah.

Comments

[wise_lil_wolf]

I didn't know squirrels used words.

[squeak_squeaker]

That's because you're not smart people smart yet, little buddy!

[Friendly, encouraging smile.] But don't worry, I wasn't smart people smart at your age... smartness is something that needs to grow with time. Like handsomeness.

[celadon_skin]

Hasn't anyone invented universal translators where you're from?

[squeak_squeaker]

I dunno what that is yet, ma'am. Sir. [Kronk also couldn't tell what he was talking to... but he liked that spinach-y green skin color a lot!]

[celadon_skin]

A universal translator is a device that allows creatures of different species to communicate with each other.

[her eyes narrow in mild annoyance] And yeah, it's Ma'am. You got it right the first time, human.

[squeak_squeaker]

Oh... woah. I wish I had one of those! I always wanted to talk to the little butterflies and... and the pet goldfishes. [Kronk smiled slowly and then he looked very relieved for guessing it right!]

You kinda remind me of my boss, ma'am, but green instead of purple.

[celadon_skin]

It's easy enough to get a translator if you're a space-faring specie. But by the looks of things yours hasn't quite reached that level of technology yet.

[she's been mistaken for a male before. Also by a human. She's starting to see a pattern here... however her head tilts slightly in interest] Oh? You work for an alien? [she's not angry, but without eyebrows it's kinda hard to tell]

[squeak_squeaker]

[Kronk was from Ancient Peru and they only had small canoes, not even real ships yet! Space travel was miles away, especially for a not so bright young man like Kronk.]

What's...uhh. What's that, space? [He looked awfully puzzled, before shaking his head.] Yzma's just an old lady, I think. But a funny looking one!

Gee... I sure hope she didn't hear that! She's not going to be happy with me if she did.

[celadon_skin]

[oooh, she's dealing with one of those types. This may prove to be very interesting. At the very least her mun is thoroughly entertained]

Space [she gestures upwards] is that part that's above the sky. Where the stars are.

Do I remind you of your boss because I look funny? [she folds her arms across her chest, staring at him pointedly. She has a theory that this Yzma may well be an alien in disguise]

[wise_lil_wolf]

[Dad said it wasn't polite for humanoid EVOs to growl. Rafe was sorely tempted.]

Hmph.

I am a plenty smart person!

[He can sense this person means well. His emotional spectrum reads pleasant and not malicious.]

[Still.]

I don't mean they don't communicate, I mean... They Squeak and stuff.

[squeak_squeaker]

[Kronk's slightly unfocused eyes followed her gesture and then he spend a good ten minutes trying to find stars... even though it was a clear, sunny afternoon. Yes, one of those types!]

...space. [He almost toppled over too, but managed to catch himself just in time.]

Ohhh...uh. [He fidgetted with his large hands, clumsily and clearly ashamed of ever calling Yzma funny and then implying that this green creature lady looked funny too! What was he thinking?] I didn't mean it like that! Hah. You don't look funny. You look pretty!

[squeak_squeaker]

[Kronk was only trying to inspire him! If he, Kronk, could be a smart Kronk... anyone could, right?] O-oh yeah, you sure are! And better looking than me. Way better looking. And muscularer. [Aww, you where frightening Kronk! He was always kinda scared of angry people... was muscularer a word?]

That just means you got to squeak back. Squeak... squeaker? [Expectant headtilt.]

1/2

[celadon_skin]

Pretty...? [well, that was a first]

2/2

[celadon_skin]

[she sharply looks away, the band of skin on either side of her face may have taken a slightly darker tinge of green]

N-not exactly what I was going for, human.

[her Mun is convinced Myaxx is "slightly tsundere." Just slightly.]

[squeak_squeaker]

[Kronk was a.... what was the opposite of tsundere? He liked hugging everyone and baking them cupcakes! Especially strangers, who he considered friends he just didn't get to befriend yet.]

I think you're pretty! And I like the green, that reminds me of spinach puffs. Those are my favorite thing to bake... even more favorite than birthday cake! [He just smiled brightly, seemingly not worried by her unusual appearance. Kronk was used to Yzma, after all.]

[celadon_skin]

[Myaxx-mun thinks it's yandere, but from what she's seen of both the movie and the animated series, Kronk is more dere than yan.]

E-everyone in my specie is green. Just varying shades of it. [she seems uncomfortable about that particular adjective and gratefully jumps at the segue] Tell me about these spinach puffs and birthday cake. They're food items, correct?

[squeak_squeaker]

[Kronk was like a big mountain of dere! The source of all dere, perhaps.] Are you...uhh. Are you the spinach puff princess, ma'am? [He'd always dreamed of there being a spinach puff princess! But people only laughed at him when he told 'em... sniff. But maybe this was it!]

Spinach puffs are spinach and- Yeah, it's a delicious food item! Spinach and cheese in a yummy puff pastry. And birthday cake's this big, three layered cake with strawberries and chocolate and loads of sprinkles, but you only get to have some on your birthday!

[Kronk was a little out of breath, now. Phew!]

[celadon_skin]

[Undeniably the source of all dere. The timeline even fits!]

I'm not royalty, if that's what you mean. Nor is my specie called "spinach puff." But it sounds very interesting. Are they difficult to make? [she's considering the possibility of learning either way. Her boss put her on kitchen duty without asking her. As usual. Might as well get something out of it]

And this birthday-only cake, is that a human law? What happens if you have some and it's not the day you were spawned?

[squeak_squeaker]

[It was a great responsibility for one Kronk!]

Ohh... [Kronk's broad shoulders sagged a little in defeat, not because she wasn't royalty but because she wasn't made out of spinach puffs! If only.]

No, they're real easy to make! Everyone can do it, even the littlest Junior Chipmunks. [Just thinking about his little friends brought a smile back on Kronk's face. And he was really very eager to teach this nice lady how to make spinach puffs] I bet I could teach you, but you'll need some comfy oven mitts so you don't hurt yourself.

[He scratched his chin in thought.] I dunno about that. I know you can't look away from Emperor Kuzco on Kuzco day but I dunno if there's any laws about birthday cakes!

[celadon_skin]

[Myaxx would quirk a brow at the slight sag of Kronk's shoulders but. No eyebrows]

I don't think I have oven mitts but I have protective work gloves that should do the trick. [Myaxx is also a lot tougher than she looks.]

Are you physically unable to look away or do you mean you're obligated not to look away? [humans have such weird laws]

[squeak_squeaker]

[Kronk would probably really miss his eyebrows, if he didn't have any!]

You can always borrow my oven mitts! But they're big. [He fidgetted with the bottom of his tunic, trying to make sense of that difficult Kuzco day question.] Oh, uhh. You're not allowed to look away!

From his head. [Emperor Kuzco was a funny little guy, wasn't he?]

[kingofkeepers]

Those would be some pretty, uh... talented squirrels.

[wise_lil_wolf]

[Head tilt.]

I wouldn't go that far, sir.

Oh.

Well, I guess you are right.

[squeak_squeaker]

Oh yeah, they're good at squeak-

[Wait... what where those stripes on his face? Why where they there? Could Kronk POKE?]

[squeak_squeaker]

Yeah... you're right! [Oh well. Kronk tried! He knew that good self-esteem was very important in young people.]

What's your favorite food, buddy?