homeless and looking

[sex_pistol]

Fuck me with a chainsaw, this place is boring with a capital B.

You better find someone for me to do before I lose my fuckin' mind over here.

Comments

[ready2go]

With a chainsaw? Really how desperate can you get?

[sex_pistol]

If I had balls they would be blue as fuck. How is that for desperate?

[ready2go]

Why don't you just join a sex game instead of bitchin'?

[sex_pistol]

Mun is actually looking a one of those.

And sista you have no fucking idea how much I am praying it happens.

[ready2go]

Well that's great! I don't want you at my game, especially not now.

[sex_pistol]

What do you mean you don't fucking want me?

[surrounded_by_idiots]

Is that an invitation?

[She's a sadist like that]

[sex_pistol]

Eh?

[Well...if you were a dude she would say yes.]

From you? No thanks sister, I'm desperate but I don't swing that way. Unless a dick is involved.

[surrounded_by_idiots]

I didn't mean from me I meant from anyone, though now I have my answer.

I imagine you would get along superbly with Upchuck.

[sex_pistol]

Upchuck? The fuck kind of fucked up name is that?

[surrounded_by_idiots]

Well, his real name is Chuck Rutheimmer but everyone just calls him "Upchuck" because he makes you want to throw up.

[sex_pistol]

Ah fuck. Guess I shouldn't even ask if he's hot or not.

[devil_within]

[Have a disgusted looking guy staring you down.]

Just when I thought this place couldn't get more disgusting...

[sex_pistol]

The fuck?

You ain't winning any beauty contests here fuckface.

[devil_within]

Physical appearance is the last thing on my priority list. If nothing else, your mere existence justifies my quest to burn society to the ground so that it can start anew.

[sex_pistol]

Oh so you are one of those losers?

Whasamatter? Making a new world cause you're tired of girls putting a bag over your head to get through fucking you?

[devil_within]

[Epic eye roll.]

Not that it's any of your business, but I am a father. I'm doing it because people like you pass as 'acceptable' in society.

[street_wise_bruiser]

I'm pretty sure they're not designed for recreational use. Not unless you're trying to end up as a tragic, cautionary tale regarding chainsaws.

[sex_pistol]

Well aren't you the smart one.

And cute too.

[street_wise_bruiser]

Admittedly, I tend to prefer brawn over brains.

[He scratches his chin a bit, mulling the word over.]

...Cute, huh? Ain't been called that in a while. Unless you count the other inmates, and the last one that said that ended up in the trauma ward. Never heard it again, after that. I guess I lost my boyish charm.

[sex_pistol]

Oh, prison huh?

Must be tough, but I'd pay you a conjugal visit to make it easier.

[street_wise_bruiser]

That tends to happen when you go around wailing on hoodlums indiscriminately. Back in the day, it was called "cleaning up the city". Then apparently the times changed, and it was just plain old "assault".

Afraid a prison ain't really much of a place for a lady.

[totallydudular]

It's only as boring as you make it, right? No need for chainsaws, lady.

[He's just going to assume he heard something else...]

[sex_pistol]

I'm just sitting here in some fucked up headspace, the fuck else am I suppose to do?

[totallydudular]

Are you by yourself? There's gotta be somethin' fun to do in there. Unless it's like, totally empty. Or like an office or somethin'. Y'know...?