needs more mjolnir

[liftme]

[Oh, look. It's just a hammer, right? Just a big, metal, shiny, beautiful hammer.

But he's all alone! He doesn't like being alone.

His mun picked him up. Thor picks him up.

Wait, mun. How did you manage to pick him up?]

Comments

[bestassistant]

[ You are the strangest looking paperweight he has ever seen in the work room. Not to mention in the wrong spot and kinda dirty.

Have a good natured idiot robot slowly trying to bump Mjolnir to the edge of the workbench. ]

[liftme]

[Hold on, weighing the worth of the robot and if he should oblige. . .|

You, robosir, are unworthy to lift him, but scoot him along? Okay! He can do this! Let's scoot around, metal guy!]

[bestassistant]

[ Pff. He is super worthy okay. First of all. He has an arm. Secondly he only does good things. Third, he's probably too dumb to be a bad guy anyway. But whatever. Nudging works. To the edge of the desk where the papers are where the paperweight belongs.

Yes. Good. Tony wull be so happy. 8) ]

[imswinginghere]

[Along came a spider...]

You're... a really big hammer.

[Peter tentatively reaches out and... pokes the handle of Mjolnir with a fingertip.

Brave, he is not. Stupid, he is not. Yet.]

[liftme]

[No frightening Mjolnir away, Mister Spider-Man!

Yes, he is a very big (and handsome, Thor takes good care of him) hammer. Poking is not cool, though, so he doesn't budge. He'll weigh your worthiness if you touch him properly, Pete!]

[imswinginghere]

[Peter squats in closer, squinting at Mjolnir. The only thing he can imagine using this big of a hammer for is hitting a group of equally-sized nails. There's a leather--or what he assumes is leather--hand strap on the end. He touches that, first. The leather is almost warm. Hot, even.

The outer ring of the block of the hammer has swirly designs on it that reminds him of the Celtic rocks broken apart in the Met.

Wasn't there a Norse god who used a hammer? Soar? Moar? Hoar? No, definitely not Hoar...

He continues to look at the handle. After about two minutes of intense scrutinizing, he--with very, very light fingers--wraps his hand around the handle. Not moving, for now.]

[sixthanimorph]

[Well, now. What do we have here?]

Man, what is it with people throwing away cool junk in this construction site?

[Whatever, you'll probably make him good money on eBay.

So he'll just be trying to pick you up now. One-handed, even.]

[liftme]

[Ew!

This fellow tastes yucky. Manipulative, maybe even greedy. Young, definitely, but almost murderous. Not quite Loki yucky, but pretty yucky in the scheme of things.

Sorry, gross boy, he is not going anywhere with you. There's no budging or anything, just a hammer in the same position as it was before it was touched.]

[sixthanimorph]

[... Okay, that didn't quite go as planned. Let's see if he can do it two-handed.]

[And two-handed isn't working out so well. Geez, what is this thing made out of, anyway?]

[Still, David's not one for giving up, so after one and two handed didn't work, he's going to try lifting you from the hammer end. Maybe he's not the most upright sort of guys, but he has to get points for persistence. Right?]

[fuhgottaboutit]

[Oh, man, a hammer! And it feels like it's just begging to be picked up. It's like the urge Osaka gets when she sees a fire alarm, or stands at the top of a tall building, but without all the consequences.

Gonna try and pick up that hammer! Spoiler she probably couldn't even lift it if it was made of plywood]

[liftme]

[A young girl! With very, very big eyes. Hello, young lady!

Oh no, definitely not worthy. Not even strong enough to pick him up if she was worthy. Not yucky, not gross, but not worthy. Please don't turn on the fourth wall fire alarm, little girl, Mjolnir doesn't like making grand escapes if he doesn't have to.

Not that catching on fire would bother him, but Thor put these leather straps on him, do not want them burned!]

[fuhgottaboutit]

Hnnngh... [After about three seconds she stops to catch her breath.] Wow, you're heavy.

....

[TRYING AGAIN. MAYBE IF SHE JUST PULLS HARDER.]

1/2

[olympic_lion]

[Mjolnir? And just what do you think you're doing here, you're supposed to be hanging around with some well-shampooed Asgardian!

2/2

[olympic_lion]

Hmm...

Maybe Hercules should try bringing it over to him. After last time with that Thorse creature, he probably wouldn't like to deal with getting his hammer back from whatever 'worthies' might try staking a claim on it.]

HMM...

[liftme]

[Oooh, it smells Greek in here. Very Greek, very hairy, and also very manly. Manly in the sweaty way, since Thor is very sweaty most of the time and is the height of manly. There is no one as manly a man as Thor.

What are you HMMing at, Hairy Manly Greek Man? Are you going to try and lift him? Let him weigh your worth, batter up!]

[bloodbrothers]

[ Oh fuck you. 8( ]

[liftme]

[What is that yucky smell?

Oh no. It's Loki. Yucky grody icky Loki. Please don't touch him, Mister Mischief. If Mjolnir had a tummy, you would make it flip and turn and hurt. Mjolnir doesn't like hurting, even if Thor gets out of control sometimes :(

Please don't gross him up!]

[bloodbrothers]

[ Don't even lie, you know he smells way better than Thor the God of sweat and mead. Such a rude little creature you are Mjolnir.

Plus he's lifted you before, way back when.

He's not even trying right now, just glaring a bit. ]

[youareboned]

[That... is a very interesting hammer.

As is the insignia on it. Not any company he knows of, or any artisan symbol in the last few centuries. Actually, it reminds him a lot of what he's been digging into with Hydra research.

Which might be why he's just circling the hammer, rubbing at his chin and looking it over with extremely appraising eyes.]

[liftme]

[Hello, new mortal man!

Hmm...this one smells like metal, oil (some he hasn't come across that much, but he figures it's what's got his hair in place so well), and intelligence. Sometimes intelligence is bad, though, when put in the wrong hands.

Mjolnir is totally cool with being appraised. Rembrandt, Van Gogh, Picasso...they are all bottom tier when it comes to Mjolnir here. He recognizes that look—curious but not in the way that he'd want to sell him or rub beer-stained hands all over him—which is why he moves to fall flat on his head, that tempting handle sticking straight up. Do you like what you see, Howard? He can turn for you, too!]

[youareboned]

Well I'll be...

[He's muttering that bit under his breath as he falls to a crouch next to this interesting, turning hammer. And that tempting, leather wrapped handle. The strap just sitting there, still and practically calling out to him.

He's always been a bit... curious. And not well-known for taking the slow path, keeping his head down and his neck out of trouble.

Finally, Howard reaches out, skimming fingers along the symbols Mjolnir's boasting on its sides, flicking against the strap at the end.]

What are you, bud?

[forsooth]

[Whoa. Whoa. Hold on, this is.. This is Mjolnir. Same insignia, same aura, same... everything. She doesn't dare try to lift it- but.. But..]

What are you doing all the way out here.. [She really has to wonder. Where's your weilder, yo?]

[liftme]

[Mjolnir doesn't know where Thor is, little lady with fabulous Thor-like hair. Do you know where Thor is? He'd like to see Thor again. Maybe. He's worthy now, he's sure they'll be buddies all over again, especially after he broke that cage thing.

He doesn't know why he's out here! Why are you out here, hmm?]

[odinsonthor]

[Stands there a little confused rubbing his head]

I am curious as to why you have found yourself in such a place Mjolnir.

[He holds out a hand and grips the handle]

[outofthechair]

[Of all the things he thought he would come across on a simple walk, it wasn't a hammer. Spock has never seen anything like it before. This is him, crouching down to take a better look, tricorder in hand.]


Fascinating.