most tremulous voice testing.

[consultingsociopath]

Mundane,

What, exactly, are you waiting for? If you're going to attempt to play me without making an absolute fool of yourself, you need to watch the second season. You can't possibly expect to play anyone adequately with less information than everyone around you, much less me.

No, 'waiting to watch the episodes with John's mun' is not a valid excuse. I'm always ten steps ahead of him; you need to be ten steps ahead of her, as well.





...Well, if we can't even agree on that, I can already conclude that you're going to fail at this spectacularly. Oh, by all means, do try to prove me wrong. Nobody else has succeeded at it, but I'm quite sure you can be the first.

Shut up.

Mycroft doesn't count. And if you like him so much, maybe you should go and play him instead of bothering me. I do have more important things I can be doing.

Comments

[1_truth]

Muns never listen to what we have to say. It's an annoying but true fact.

[consultingsociopath]

They'll listen when they have enough proof, surely.

[1_truth]

I wouldn't hold out too much hope. They're usually pretty stubborn get their way no matter what.

[consultingsociopath]

I can hardly be expected to hang about here all day. I have things things do.





And I'll get bored.

[1_truth]

As do I.

As for boredom though, you could try reading? For you specifically- I'd recommend anything by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle- I'm sure you'd find it fascinating.

[consultingsociopath]

Who?

Is it fiction? I don't read a lot of fiction; it's dull.

[1_truth]

Ah, it is. But it's about a consulting detective. The best there is.

[consultingsociopath]

[Prepare yourself for the gentle sound of Sherlock's brain snapping. It's faint, but audible if you listen closely enough.]

I don't know who you think you're talking about, but there's only one consulting detective in the world, because I invented the position. And I have someone authorised chronicling my work already-- if some talentless hack has been sullying the position with a fictional character, I shall be greatly displeased.

[wealldosillythings]

Do you need any help with those important things?

[consultingsociopath]

I might, if I were allowed to address them.

[All those lovely bodies just waiting in the morgue, all those fascinating experiments which could be carried out... And he's here, instead. Stalled. Waiting for someone else's schedule. Insufferable.]

You have a word with her; maybe she'll listen to reason if it isn't coming from me.

[1_truth]

It isn't quite like you think, check the original copywright date.

As I said, you'd find it fascinating.

[consultingsociopath]

[He does not like the way you are looking at him, young man. It's almost like the way he looks at other people. And he isn't getting any reception to check that up on his phone. He hates everything right now.]

[1_truth]

[Well... at least now he knows how Watson feels?]

Ah, no reception? Unfortunately I don't have my copy with me.

[consultingsociopath]

[He may ask, but he does not actually want to know what it's like in other people's tiny brains.]

I wouldn't expect you did.

[1_truth]

I guess I could tell you, about why you'd find it fascinating.

But you probably wouldn't believe me-it's better to have evidence.

[consultingsociopath]

Try it, and let's see what happens.

[He's quite good at telling when people are lying, but obviously he's not going to tell you that.]

[1_truth]

[Except that... Conan would pretty much expect that]

The original publishing date of the book in question was 1887. The title of that book is Sherlock Holmes: A Study in Scarlet.

[consultingsociopath]

[Of course, given his knowledge. He ponders that for a second, because he might just have read John's blog and concocted an elaborate leg-pulling scheme, and yet... No. But that-- No. And he isn't-- No. That little snap you just heard? That was indeed his brain snapping, and shame on you-- he needs that for work.]

[1_truth]

[Conan is more than sure he'll bounce back. If it's possible to bounce back from SHRINKING. It's possible for Sherlock to get over the peculiar parallels.]

Actually, it just so happens that I'm named after the author of the series. Lucky for me he happens to be my favorite.

[consultingsociopath]

[Sherlock can get over just about anything, except perhaps for Mycroft being cleverer than him, or ever being right. That doesn't mean he wants to, though.]

There is likely to be a high degree of causality there.

[1_truth]

Ah, my dad is also a big fan.

[Or it could be that his name isn't really Conan at all and it's just an alias he chose spur of the moment when pressed for a name]

So it's not really surprising that I'd be a fan, too.

[consultingsociopath]

That is what I said.

[Technically, Sherlock hasn't asked for his name; it isn't relevant, and he doesn't care. Because he's a huge dick, obviously.]

[1_truth]

[Conan does not notice as he is usually a massive jerk in his own right and takes joy in ruining other people's fun by revealing their trick. Also, it doesn't bother him one bit if he's not asked for his name as there is a high chance that Sherlock would be able to realize the name 'Edogawa Conan' is an alias.]

[As much of a fan as Shinichi is, he'd rather not take the chance Gin or Vodka could overhear and get everyone associated with him killed.]

Trust me, I'm well aware of what you just said- as well as your annoyance at the idea of someone repeating the exact same thing you just said.

However, I was merely agreeing with you.

[consultingsociopath]

It always happens eventually.

[Though usually later than sooner. And obviously, 'always' is gross hyperbole. Mundane has no familiarity with Conan's canon and is thus on the back foot a little here; apologies.]

[wealldosillythings]

Gosh, you really must be desperate, huh? [She clears her throat a little, nervously] I-I mean, to be, you know, asking someone to listen to me, that is.

Um, Ms. Mundane? A-Are you there, it's me, Molly. Oh that's probably dumb you must have at least a small idea of who I am...I think.
Um...c-could you maybe be a bit nicer to Sherlock? Or at least watch one episode of the second season to appease him? You could always rewatch it with your John-mun friend...

...Sherlock, I'm sorry, I think I'm rubbish at this.