newbabylon, I guess.....?

[the_earths_salt]

Mundane,

You pick truly irrational times to revisit your fondness for me. We are both aware of this. Although you have my gratitude for allowing me this time with Zexion--and to take a more logical route with the Keybearer--, and I am willing to exist in the world you have offered me to, I must request a measure of caution.

You anticipate the burden of your studies to be a strenuous one. Do not overextend yourself. If you wish to manipulate me, then do so, and do so consistently and well--your inattention will not be well-received, by your friends or myself. Do not attempt to do so simply because you wish to be able to emulate me in your own affairs, or to increase my presence in your life.

Know this: I will not leave you. I will not resist your decisions. But nor will I condone shoddy work on any project you pursue, either. Make your decisions, and execute them. Use me as you please, and I will do my utmost to help you however I can--but do not neglect me, and do not neglect yourself or your education. You stand to gain too much at this point to sabotage yourself with weakness of purpose or heart.

Yours,
Lexaeus

Comments

I'm sorry for intruding

[real_moon]

Lexaeus...yes, he talked about a Lexaeus. Are you one of those Heartlesses who are Zexion's comrades? my name is Yin. And i1d like you to take away my heart. You can do it, can't you?

[OOC:I'd like to ask for help in taking away my AU!Yin's heart (she's actually not here but on LJ, but whatever.) It would take just a few posts and I was very thankful for it...:)think it over, thanks in advance!]

[the_earths_salt]

Nobody. We are Nobodies, Zexion and I--how do you know him?

[While he can't feel the shock, Lexaeus is certainly putting on a good show of demonstrating it, incredulously staring at Yin as though she's suddenly sprouted an extra head. What in the world is he supposed to say to that?]

I..... could do so, yes..... But why on earth would you want to lose your heart?

((OOC: No problem either way! Dear_Mun is made for random insertions. ♥ I assume you mean this thread? Expect a bit of delay after this; I'm headed to work, but I'll be back this evening.))

I'm sorry, I can be online only in these time period :(

[real_moon]

Zexion saved my life. He didn't hit back when I slapped him...well, he did not kiss me back when I kissed him but he didn't tell me not to do it again. He's the man I love, but I can't be with him anymore. And...I don't need this heart filled with sorrow and hatred anymore. You were a...real comrade of Zexion. I'd like to give this heart to you. Literally.

No worries :( I'm pulling an all-nighter tonight

[the_earths_salt]

.....I see.....

[Not striking back and biding his time? He can see that. But..... kissing? He's rather sure that's outside of the usual range of activities he knows Zexion to do. And asking to lose your heart for the sake of love, of all things..... That's even worse than a lovers' suicide. That completely defeats the purpose of it all..... doesn't it? It isn't as if Zexion can love her back, or even really feel anything for that kind of sacrifice. She'll have to struggle through the rest of her life, equally empty, because of a hasty decision borne of grief.

.....But he's certainly not this girl's keeper, either. And if Zexion is willing to put up with her--be with her? Had they figured out some way to make it genuine?--then there must be something special about her. He slowly nods.]

.....If you truly wish to lose your heart for good, then, I will accept it. But this is not something that can be undone, once you choose to move forward with it. Are you certain?

Re: No worries :( I'm pulling an all-nighter tonight

[real_moon]

I am.

But...do you have to touch me to do it? Just because in that case you'll get back your heart and feelings. Don't worry, it won't keep forever. You'll be a Hear...a Nobody again after it.

Re: No worries :( I'm pulling an all-nighter tonight

[the_earths_salt]

.....I--yes. Yes, in a manner of speaking, I will have to..... How exactly does that happen?

[The idea is mind boggling, at once terrible and awe-inspiring. Someone who could restore a heart with a mere touch? It sounds impossible, the cruelest torment to be able to catch only a mere glimpse of what you desire in brief snatches..... But he thinks he might understand why even Zexion would be tempted by such a girl.]

Re: No worries :( I'm pulling an all-nighter tonight

[real_moon]

I don't know. It just happens. It's not something I want to do or I can control. I'd prefer not to hear you crying...

[Yin stays in silence for a moment]

He cried. Why would I want something what makes me cry?

[the_earths_salt]

[Zexion cried? That's nearly incomprehensible. He can understand the why in theory, but envisioning him of all people doing so..... He shakes his head grimly.]

You won't hear me cry, Yin--I have more self-control than that, whatever your touch may do to me. But a way to restore a heart permanently is what we've been seeking for years, so this..... ability of yours.....

.....Perhaps your Heartless may shed some light on it, with any luck. If you have any last words or requests, now is the time for them.

Man, I didn't think this would be so hard...XD

[real_moon]

Don't speak like you were about killing me. You save my life. Would you...remember me? Could you keep in mind that there was someone who loved him? Someone who loved Zexion...too much.

[The pain at her chest as she says out his name makes her dizzy.]

It's possible that I'll be able to give back hearts after you take away mine. If you think so I can stay beside you.

XD Any reason why? It's kind of adorable.<3

[the_earths_salt]

Even if this saves your life, it is still a death--you end your human life here. From this point forth, you will be nothing and belong nowhere--save perhaps by our sides, as one of our own. Regardless, I will remember you, and I will consider myself fortunate if you choose to stay with us.

[Lexaeus watches her levelly--it's an occasion that calls for being solemn, he thinks, someone choosing to throw away their own heart and existence. But her resolve is clear, and her will is firm--it's up to her now to have the inner strength to survive the transformation with her mind and body intact.

Fiery ethereal darkness blazes around his hand as he steps towards her, and Lexaeus pauses an arm's length away, ground rumbling and air shimmering with the energy suddenly radiating off him. He drives his hand into her chest, through it like a ghost--the touch itself likely won't hurt, but when he wraps his hand around her heart? When he sends torrents of darkness ripping through her to consume it, and weaken the ties to her body and soul until he can rip it straight out of her?

It's violence of the most intimate sort, rushed to ensure that her powers won't interfere with the process mid-act. It would probably be even worse to hang stuck on the balance than to lose her heart entirely, after all, and he's never been cruel without cause.]

Her voice is too loud...:( But...

[real_moon]

[And Yin understands what it means losing her heart.

Zexion won't be nothing but a fading memory for her. He won't count anymore. He'll be more far of her as he is now. Yin didn't think it could be possible...til this moment. Her memories of him won't count anymore. Memories will be useless. And one day she'll wake up and won't remember Zexion's name.]

Stop...it. Plea...

[She can't cry or beg for her heart, but she finally realises this not what she wanted.

And while Yin faces one of the biggest faults of her life, feelings silently return back to Lexaeus, filling him up like rain fills up a well in the desert.]

[OOC. Could you spare her? I'll be here in the next two hours, if you have time...I'd like to see what will happen :P And if I try to godmod or force Lexaeus to do anything, yell at me, OK? P.S: Lexaeus is very in character :) ]

[the_earths_salt]

[Memories will be worthless, save as reminders of what she's lost--what she's sacrificed, willingly, knowingly. She can escape her pain by running away from it, and running to a far greater pain in turn--the tormenting anguish of eternal emptiness. She'll give away her heart in the name of love--and in the process, make that love meaningless, simply because it will not only cease to be, but cease to matter to her at all.

That pain and loss will be carried within her, always--and she won't have to grieve to see Zexion's tears, because they will mean nothing anymore--he will mean nothing anymore. To remember his name, his embrace, his love--all of it will just be colorless memories, only so much an act that she can choose to pretend at and hold on to for as long as she rationally wills the charade to continue. If she chooses to let it continue--perhaps she may give it up as meaningless and futile. Perhaps her heart won't even be strong enough to let her keep a human shape and her full intellect at all. Managing to do so, after all, is rare to the point of miraculous.

He's allowing her to do it. He's letting her throw everything away--because she wants to. Because it's her decision. Because he's told her what it means, and she's accepting the consequences of her actions.

But no, wait--she's understood now, it seems. Finally, perhaps too late, she realizes what a fool she's being. And Lexaeus remembers with stark clarity the loss of his own heart, the rush of darkness engulfing him, the overpowering fear and horror that had kept him even from screaming. The memory and its attendant emotions flood back to him with such force it nearly makes him sick; and he swallows back the bile rising in his throat, opening his hand and staggering back to tear himself free of her.

The darkness surrounding him flickers and fades, and his hands are empty as he stares at her--abruptly stopped in the middle like this, he's not sure what will happen now. Her heart and its connection to her have surely been weakened, filled with darkness as she's been--it's possible that the process will roll on without his intervention. She may succumb to the darkness and allow the rest of her heart to be consumed. But if she has the strength to resist..... Well, maybe there's hope for her yet. Perhaps she'll always be changed, or perhaps she'll recover, but there's a chance that she'll remain whole.]

.....Are..... A-are you alright.....?

((OOC: Thank you~ =3 I'll be sure to tell you if anything crosses the line, and be sure to do the same for me. This is looking really interesting.))

[real_moon]

Y...yes.

[Yin lies as she hears Lexaeus' voice from far away. She almost fell into...something worse then hell. It's not that she1d knew what hell is like. But she doesn't want to make Lexaeus worry...No, he can't worry because he doesn't have a heart but maybe he feels ill...]

And you? I didn't hurt you too much, did I?

[She doesn't really know what to say, so she says what she thinks]

Thank you...thank you for...everything you did here.

[And she doesn't cry because crying is the most pointless thing in the world.]