(no subject)

[shilowallace]

Maybe...maybe it is okay to travel alone. Maybe it's just...time and maybe that's what I was supposed to learn when someone bailed out and left me to fend for myself at the Opera.

Whether he did it for me or not, it shouldn't matter anymore.

I should, just...be brave. And travel alone. I know there's only so many ways to say this and so many times we can, but...let's try to stop being afraid, okay?

Comments

[sharpsuitfluffytail]

Alone is the best way to do anything, kid.

[shilowallace]

I think you...might be right. It's just...well, I've always been alone. But, at the same time, I've never really...been...that alone. It sounds stupid, I know. But it's weird. And it's scary, sometimes. ...Most times.

[sharpsuitfluffytail]

Right, right. Well, baby bird's gotta leave the nest sometime.

[shilowallace]

She does. I do. I know. There's nothing left in this nest for me.

Not sure why I felt the need to tag a repo! character with my homestuck AU but oh well

[bayou_miracles]

Sister I think you need to find what is natural for you. Some people just don't seem to need company but other people, like me, just feel WRONG when they don't have a friend to be around.

[shilowallace]

What's...natural isn't exactly what's right. But almost everyone I know...knew is dead. And I'm not sure where I'm supposed to go now.

[bayou_miracles]

By natural I mean what feels right to you. You know when something ain't natural to you because you get that creeping sensation all over and things just feel wrong to you.

...Your friends are dead? I'm sorry sister I don't know what you can really do other than move onto a new place where you won't be so alone.

[shilowallace]

Oh. Yeah, there's a lot of that unnatural stuff in my life, I guess, when you put it that way.

They weren't...well. Only one of them was my friend. My godmother. And I hardly knew her. But...thanks.

[oh_young_mariner]

I could tell you about going on alone; I've done it so many times.

It's okay to feel all those things you feel. Be patient with yourself and your hesitations. And while you're doing that, start looking around, or keep looking if you're already doing it. You'll find the next place. And then life will have moved on, because you'll be immersed in its next phase.

[shilowallace]

It just feels like I've been trying to be patient for years. I know I can't just...magically make everything the way it's never been, but...how long do I have to wait? I...don't even know where to start.

[oh_young_mariner]

I know what you mean.

There isn't a point where the journey ends, as far as I can tell. We just keep going, and we learn a few things along the way. My mun's been playing me intensively for more than four years, and I have not found the things I was originally seeking, or at least, I have not found them permanently.

My suggestion for where to start: honor yourself and your journey. There's no magic, but there is growth and change.

I have my doubts and fears, too. I guess nobody escapes those. But even in my worst moments, I still know the trip has been worth it.

I don't know if this helps.

[organloaner]

You sound brave to me.

[shilowallace]

That's a start, right? Playing the part?

[organloaner]

And though it feels as though it's tearing you apart,
Don't abandon your broken heart.
The pain will help you grow and bloom,
Your new life will start soon.
Far away from that bedroom.