dear_mun | someone's mun found like 60 more icons and they are terrible

[impressive. she has to hand it to stark, he might be an arrogant, egotistical ass that no one likes, but he's fun to work with sometimes.]

If you say so, Mr. -- Ah..

Justin Hammer, CEO Hammer Industries and...former bitch boy for the American government.

Oh. Right. [Wait a second.. wait for it.]

Your security programs were shit.

[Yep, now she remembers him.]

[What IS it with Russians hating on his security? He can't help it some of them are smarter than...it's not his fault!]

E-heh, yeah...I've heard that before, too.

And yet you didn't improve and your mun was able to do this to you?

[Not impressed.]

Do what? Let everyone tell me what a douchebag I am? How is that beneficial to anyone?

The pictures. You can't hack your own brain?

[Duh.]

Oh, hah. [He's offended, though.] Don't you ever compare the two of us, we are nothing alike. Besides, she's got far too much...there's too many unsavory types in here for us to be at all alike.

[Two of them have his face. One is a Stephen King villain. Save him.]

You must fit right in.

[Eye roll.]

I—no, I don't. Actually.

Didn't we already go over the whole "let it go" thing? I liked that thing. It was a good thing. I'd like to do it. As in, right now.

What are you doing here, Hammer?

[have a blunt subject change, then.]

[. . .]

...what do you mean, here? Like...why does someone feel the urge to make one of these things for me or why did I ever exist in the first place?

Usually a mun doesn't put people out here unless they have a plan. So what's your plan?

[His plan? Justin Hammer's plans are...well, he made Hammer Industries from pretty much nothing, so it's not that his plans suck. It's just that his plans in regards to spiteful, bitter, envious, jealous revenge are for the birds.]

Ah...well. If you mean a game or something, I...there's a possibility? But I'm not really concerned either way. Besides her issues of letting people kick me in the face, I'm pretty content to, ah, "go with the flow."

[She seems to recall that he had millions of dollars to help make Hammer Industries. Is she wrong?]

... I wonder if Stark would be interested in seeing you. Though our 'game' is.. I'd rather not see you there.

[Billions, sweetcheeks.]

Is that your so-called masterful way of intriguing me and asking you about said game and how to sell me and the bitch on it?

[justin

so kind]

[Yes, you truly came from 'nothing', Hammer.]

No. It's my honest way of telling you I don't want you within a hundred miles of that place, but my mun does so I'm being told to tell you about it anyway.

[This is sweet. This is nice. She doesn't want to be anywhere near him but can't get away. Oh, this is prime sleazeball territory, and he had said he'd make a problem for one Pepper Potts. But Natasha? She broke his glasses. For some reason no one who didn't wear them would probably understand, that had been the worst insult of the night. Being dragged out in handcuffs while explosives were going off and screaming rang through the air without being able to see was more terrifying than Ivan Vanko's feet. Just blurs of color and nothing that he could focus on—that was the worst part, physically.

Mentally, emotionally...zen. Count to ten. He had a good therapist, he couldn't displease her with this. Seven...six...]

What are you waiting for?

[It might kill him to know that she hadn't even considered that he would hold a grudge against her. Wasn't she forgettable? His comfort had been the last thing on her mind that night. But given that this was Justin Hammer ...

She could probably handle it.]

Stalling for time, mostly.

[Oh, no, here it is, the kick in the pants from her mun telling her to get it over with.]

The game I'm in - I've been brought to a country. Essentially, the only way to get out and save the entire place is to have sex. Lots of sex.

[There was nothing forgettable about having one's sight taken away.

...but...really?]

Are you trying to seduce me, Agent Romanov?

[If Justin Hammer ever got married, they'd release doves and his NRA sponsors would shoot them out of the air fucking birds. Fucking Russians.]

[Surprisingly, she'd agree with him on that one. She'd been tortured that way, once.]

In your dreams, Hammer.

[Can you see why she didn't want to tell you about the place?]

Good. Because, unlike the genius billionaire you know, I am not a wino manslut intent on banging the fuck out of every woman in a ten mile radius on the anniversary of my parents' death. I mean, I love Anthony and all, but that's a bit tasteless for me.

[um. tmi.]

You're assuming I want to hear about any of this.

You're assuming you get off the hook despite propositioning my mun to put me in a game with you that involves lots and lots of sex.

Technically, it's fair play.

2/2

i'm sorry my parents didn't use protection but i can't help that i still breathe 8(

HAHAHAHAA sobbing over here 1/2

2/2

not as much as he sobs every night to ocean waves on his sound machine

being a rich guy must be so hard ;o;

*being a rich douchebag extraordinaire

*rich douchebag failface extraordinaire

*complete and utter loser to the nth degree

*yeeeeeeeeeeeeep not like this sexy lady here

Comparing them is a crime.

Icon completely related.

AND I WAS LIKE BABY BABY BABY NOOOOOO

psh he'd love it. :|

well. maybe. but fuzzy handcuffs or no handcuffs at all.

fuzzy pink handcuffs for him then.

then it's...tolerable

if by tolerable you mean damn hot and a little awkward?

awkward is one of justin's many middle names.

awkward with a capital AWKWARD

god now i want to see how hammer would sign an autograph...

it'd probably take him 20 mins!

FFFHAHA yes, and it would take him hours to get it DOWN to 20 minutes in the first place

HAHAHAH hammer you goof

he's a silly billy who deserves noogies