dear_mun | (no subject)

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...

Really? This is what gets you looking at me again, darling? You being offended on my behalf? That's sweet and all, but that isn't exactly going to keep you interested for long. So why don't you just do both of us a favour and go back to playing with the dominatrix that isn't my sister and leave Justine and I alone with Mara.

You know what I mean. Now get going, sweetheart, I'm busy.

Thomas

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Nice to see you too, jerk-off.

Well, I am easy on the eyes. But you can come too, Alice, Justine's been asking after you.

Right. Justine misses me. Remember the last time one of us punched you? I'm stronger than him.

Oh right, I miss getting my spine snapped in half. That's what I meant.

Sassing doesn't work on me, Thomas. You know what I mean. Say the words.

"Yes, I'll buy you those Louboutins?"

Pfft. Once more with feeling, prettyboy, and remember that I know you.

Come on now, darling, you know me well enough to know I don't do feelings.

[At least, not saying them, c'mon Alice.]

[She sighs.] I guess maybe I was hoping for some progress. I missed you too, Thomas.

'Progress' is for people who aren't already perfect.

And 'plastic surgery' is for people whose pretty pretty faces keep getting mysteriously messed up, God Thomas it's like you're trying to piss me off. Like more than usual, is this what happiness does to you?

What can I say? It's genetic.

At least you invited me, yeah? I pinky promise not to hurt you on purpose if you get rid of my headache.

You know me, Alice. Perfect gentleman. I can never say no to a woman in need.

I'd roll my eyes but they hurt too much, which is so the only reason I'd accept right now except for I also want to see Justine.

Once you can roll your eyes properly again, you should definitely take her shopping. Justine could use a lot more new lingerie.

[Yes, he'll even give you his credit card, Alice.]

I am so not dressing your harem, Thomas, not unless I get way more than a Tylenol.

She's not my harem.

Oh honey, you know I didn't mean it like that, don't make puppy eyes at me or I'll cry and you know it.

Maybe.

You're such a jerk. Why can't you just seduce me like a normal sexpire instead of the big act? The things I put up with for Thomas Raith...

You know, the last time I was charming and seductive you started trying to play therapist.

That's 'cause you were charming, seductive, and totally messed in the head. Duh.

You always think I'm messed in the head when I try to be charming and seductive.

Wrong! I always think you're messed in the head, and on top of that, you're charming and seductive.

[This face.]

[Alice winning forever!]

That hurts, Alice.

Too bad so sad.

And you say I'm obnoxious?

I'm way better than you and if I wasn't I wouldn't get anywhere with you.

You're probably right about that.

Keep up with the sweetheart, I'm sure she'll do everything you say.

I know her better than you do, darling. She likes having me right where I am far too much to try anything.

I didn't say she'd move you. Just that she wouldn't necessarily go bending over backward when you get condescending.

Not that it's any of my business. Just observing from over here.

I haven't even gotten to 'condescending' yet. Right now we're still at 'annoyingly smug'.

Your 'annoyingly smug' comes off as 'kind of condescending'. Unless it's losing something in the text.

At least yours is looking at you.

I'd rather she didn't. Her looking always translates into me getting my ass kicked ~~usually by a girl~~.

We're far too pretty not to be looked at. [ Except no, he doesn't really mind being let to his own devices, either. ]

Easy solution: Don't let anyone kick your ass.

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