still homeless

[cockroach]

Oh, don't even bother pretending you don't miss me. Who wouldn't? It has been weeks, hasn't it?

Comments

[sassy_spy]

...I'm pretty sure Colonel doesn't...

[the_necromancer]

Now Anise you shouldn't get him fussy. Snot will get everywhere.

[sassy_spy]

Aww, Colonel. You took the fun out of it!

[cockroach]

S-Shut up! Of course he wouldn't admit such a thing to you!

[sassy_spy]

How would you know? You don't know what we do behind your back~♪

[cockroach]

Oh, but I do. I do have eyes in places you're not even aware of.

1/2

[sassy_spy]

?!

[sassy_spy]

PERVERT! I knew it was you!

[cockroach]

[ wait what. ]

...What are you talking about?

[sassy_spy]

It's more than obvious since you brought it up!

Leave it to the guilty dog to bark first.

[cockroach]

Oh come now, Anise. I was talking about a different pair of eyes.

[sassy_spy]

Look Dist.

Look with your special eyes

But preferably not through my bedroom window at night.

[cockroach]

...why would I even bother with that when I have better, more important things to do?

[sassy_spy]

I don't know Dist, why don't you tell me.

jade is a dick, this is news

[uncutejade]

It's been years and I still don't miss you.

gasp

[cockroach]

How dare you lie to my face, Jade!

[uncutejade]

Ah, I see. It's opposite day.

Indeed, how dare I lie in your illustrious presence. It must be because I am overcome with feelings of inferiority.

[cockroach]

As you should. I am, after all, in every way your superior.

[uncutejade]

Yes. It's why you've always followed me around, never giving me a moment's peace. To help me feel better about myself.

[ Maybe he can grow up to be just like you! ]

[glasses_gleam]

Dist, of course I've missed you, terribly~

[cockroach]

Well of course you do, Jade. It's good of you to come and openly admit it.

[glasses_gleam]

Of course I've missed my servant, do get me some coffee would you? I've been waiting over a week now.

You might also attend to the dishes in the manor.

And don't forget to clean your doghouse, I think His Majesty's Rappigs have moved in in your absence~

[cockroach]

...oh that's so funny, Jade. How childish of you.

[glasses_gleam]

I think the phrase is, "If the shoe fits."

And I'd much rather you a servant than my shadow. I worry about a film getting tracked on everything from your drool in that case~

[cockroach]

You think you're so clever, don't you?

[glasses_gleam]

Not at all, I'm in complete and total awe at your genius.

Only such a rare wit can have every plan blow up in their face spectacularly, and oftentimes literally~

1/2

[cockroach]

Well. I've always thought you were jealous of my abi--

[cockroach]

JADE!!!

[glasses_gleam]

No need to shout Dist, I might be senile, but I am quite sure I know my own name~

...Actually my memory might be going. I've forgotten my errands.

[fononfailure]

[ Note to self: the easiest way to locate Jade(s) is to dangle Dist where they'll be sure to smell him. ]

Maybe your mun thought you were finally out of season.

[glasses_gleam]

[But only because they sense weakness and know to strike~]

[fononfailure]

[ SOB. Like a pack of scary fonic-powered piranhas! ]

[cockroach]

What do you mean out of season?

[fononfailure]

I could've sworn I spotted your face in the garden a few days ago...