[someone's angry about last fate/zero episode]

[godsholder]

That man! How could he do something like that to him? I don't care what personality was he wearing as shell at the time. Angra is still Angra! He suffered enough! [Protective of her Servant, isn't she? How could you choke him and break his heart, Emiya Kiritsugu? You said you would accept him, you lying cheat.]

I know that wish result was awful, mundane. [A sigh. Karen and she know him better than anyone.] There were other ways to reject it without harming my Avenger.

[Not to mention her wish was granted without world destroying consequences. What now?]

Comments

[puppy_lancer]

The Grail really likes fucking with people.

[Like how he had been summoned with a body and mind ten years younger than he should be.]

You were his Master, right? Is this all part of his sick sense of humor? Sticking people in weird clothes and shaving years off their age.

[He scratches his head when he hears her mention "Kotomine".]

Koto-who? Are we talking about the same priest here?

[godsholder]

I suppose that inconveniences many.

[Deep sigh. Angra does have a weird sense of humor she's incompatible with. Like the certificate he handed her over in the beginning to exempt her from murder.]

You're not wrong. He has a sense of humor. Sometimes he never takes anything seriously.

[Blinks, confused]

Kotomine Kirei is the name of the overseer sent by the Church for the fifth Heaven's Feel.

[puppy_lancer]

No, no, no, wait. His name is Sancraid Phahn. He's got white hair and looks like a snake. I don't think Koto-whosits even went to Fuyuki, much less became an Overseer.

[Stupid alternate universes.]

[godsholder]

I never heard about that guy. Kotomine doesn't look like an albino snake.

[puppy_lancer]

What does he look like then? A drunken salaryman?

[godsholder]

He's one of the elite Executors of the Holy Church. He doesn't look like that.

[puppy_lancer]

Okay...uh...does he look like one of those old wrinkly prune priests with that little skull cap haircut?

[He can make silly guesses like these all day.]

[godsholder]

I see... Why don't you ask your mundane for a picture? That would be easy than take wild guesses about his appearance.

[puppy_lancer]

Fine, fine.

[A couple seconds later.]

...Are you sure he didn't pop out of one of your pulp fiction novels? Because he's way taller than a Japanese guy has any right to be and creeps me out in a way diffferent than than that other priest.

[godsholder]

[Frown. Pulp fiction? What is he implying she reads?]

Why is his height so intimidating? How tall are you, Lancer?

[puppy_lancer]

[Unfortunately for Lancer, almost every sort of novel is pulp fiction for him.]

As tall as my older self.

...What, are you implying I'm put off by the fact that he's one or two centimeters taller than me?

[godsholder]

Eight centimeters.

[A reminder he's 193cm]

[puppy_lancer]

So? Still doesn't intimidate me. It's more like...his hair. And his eyes. And his eyebrows. And his creepy smile that says "hi, hide all your women and children because I'm gonna molest them".

[godsholder]

He's not that kind of priest.

[puppy_lancer]

He...just has that sort of style. I'm sorry that you had to work with him for so long. Must've been hard on the eyes.

[godsholder]

Not at all. If he hadn't betrayed me like that, I would have never complained about him.

[puppy_lancer]

[He scratches his head.]

Maybe I just have a dislike for priests. I mean, they smell horrible. Sancraid...he was always smelling so strongly of incense that it would clog my nose. And then he got his hands on the grail muck and started stinking like something else entirely.

[A pause.]

Does your Avenger stink?

[godsholder]

[Ah...what?]

I don't... I don't go sniffing people to answer you.

[puppy_lancer]

No I mean, that stench, it was like it bypassed your nostrils to go straight to your brain. Like...like...like nothing in this world could surpass it. And it sends shivers right down my spine and not the good kind. I guess if evil had a scent, that would be it. Not kidding: I could probably smell it from a good distance away.

[At least he hadn't been around it so long that it would get stuck in his nostrils.]

Maybe it's a Servant thing...

[godsholder]

Nothing like that. [She blinks a little. Kotomine's coat smelled to wine sometimes, but she never thought about it when they met in missions and were in the run for their lives.] I hope I don't 'stink' to evil because of my choice of acquaintances.

[puppy_lancer]

Hold on.

[And then he takes several deep whiffs of the air around them.]

Nope. You don't stink. In fact, you smell rather...nice.

[godsholder]

Ah...

[He's actually sniffing? Her reply is pragmatic.]

It must be my shampoo.

[Or the soap. Modern people shower, Lancer.]

[puppy_lancer]

[It was a habit he had managed to pick up during his years filling in for Culann's dog. He had slowly grown out of it, to the point that it was no longer a habit for his thirty year old self. But at twenty years old, he still felt inclined to do it now and then.]

Are you sure it's not a natural fragrance? It would match your pretty face.

[Back to flirting again.]

[godsholder]

[Was it absolutely necessary to say that, Lancer? She looks embarrassed.]

I'm sure. Sweat doesn't smell as good.

[puppy_lancer]

Oh, I don't know. Some peoples' sweat smells better than others. I'm okay with burying my face in a girl's sweaty hair, but when the other guys at Emain Macha start sweating, I just wanna throw them in a river.

[He's just gonna see how far he can push this.]