dear_mun | (no subject)

See? That's exactly what I'm talking about, bro. Women are distracting. You're not getting any work done, and for what? Clear your mind and don't even go down that road.

Trust me, I know what happens. You know what happens if you do? BAM, they steal your man-onnaise for their experiments and soon we'll be obsolete. Did you know that top feminist scientists are already working on phasing men out of existence?! Scary shit, man. I'm serious, there's some kind of way now that they can extract bone marrow from a woman and like... Chem-fem-reverse-bio-engineer it to get a viable Y chromosome. You know what this means, don't you?

Women can get each other pregnant now.

That was the last line of defense we had as men, but now that's come crumbling down too! These truly are the final days, brother. The feminists are rallying their forces and getting ready to strike. So stay on guard and keep away from bitches.

Also, what the hell do you mean "homeless"? I have at least four homes, thank you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Huh? No! I mean, unless you're into that kind of thing but those men aren't allowed to call their selves men!

Fapping, dude. Flogging the bishop, beatin' the meat, slapping the pickle, choking the chicken, taming the one-eyed monster, the five-finger discount.

...I'm not sure about that last one. You're not gonna make me say it, are you?

You don't have to say it if you don't want to, but what sort of thing are these non-men into?

[ What is this conversation turning into? ]

Huh? I just meant feminism isn't sexy. Even if it's two feminists. Together.

Just plain lesbians are cool, though, if that's what you were worried about. When you think about it, lesbians are kind of like our allies. Or maybe hybrids.

Why would I be worried about that?

Sometimes it's nice to have allies but doing it on your own stops people getting in the way of you being you.

I see what you're saying... We can count on the lesbians, but we shouldn't rely on them because it'll make us weak!

[ Not quite what she meant but whatever. She's more than used to that, really. ]

Don't rely on the lesbians. It'll make you weak. You can rely on Hisao, though, even though he isn't a lesbian.

Well yeah, Hisao is my main man. He's actually going deep undercover, trying to infiltrate them you know. Even if he complains a lot, Hisao is pretty brave.

Hisao is pretending to be a lesbian? I didn't get that impression.

Are you sure he's not slacking off too much?

What? No, I meant the feminists! That wouldn't be a bad plan, except Hisao would make a horrible woman, even a lesbian. Also we don't need to infiltrate our allies. I don't think the lesbians would let men infiltrate them anyway...

Oh... It would be funny if Hisao dressed as a girl.

[ One order of noticeably upset, easy on the noticeable. ]

Maybe we should ask him.