xaccessgranted (
xaccessgranted) wrote in
dear_mun2012-06-10 12:16 am
Entry tags:
In which a minor character is not impressed at being brought back.....
Dear...'Mun', as others on here so delicately put it..
Do you know what it is like to be trapped in a cage??
For the past several weeks your time - that has been exactly what it has been like. Though you have been nothing but kind, I have not missed how hurt you have been - when my so called 'brother' has apparently abandoned you because of my presence. I have not missed your hurt, at your inability to be able to channel me because of these things called timing and storyline in this silly 'game' that you play in. I cannot even process for what purpose this serves.
At first when you brought me from the void - I was eager to see what world I would see...but now I realize how foolish I was. It is not even my system, but instead is a place where absolutely nothing makes logical sense! I have barely existed for not even a millicycle and I nearly choked on half the Sea all ready half derezzed from energy deprivation, and fleeing like someone hunted and in misery. How dare you build all these things to supposedly do with me and then shatter them like illusion? Do you think this is a joke? Why did you even bother bringing me back? Why did you even dare??
I know she's out there. Somewhere. No. Not in this game. Out there. In someone else's head in someone else's glitching cage. She's trapped just like I am with no outlet. I see her through your eyes - glimpses of her through what you read. I see her pain. I cannot reach her like I want to. I cannot touch her like I want to. If I could claw my way out to get to her I would. Every bit of code in me burns to be at her side to protect her. To be at her side and fight. To work together and be as one. Especially in light of a possible threat I have just recently heard of.
She's the only thing keeping me from throwing my hands up and going back to the void. If it wasn't for her - I just don't want to be here. I feel as if I have disturbed enough all ready. I hate feeling trapped and unable to do anything.
Vector
Do you know what it is like to be trapped in a cage??
For the past several weeks your time - that has been exactly what it has been like. Though you have been nothing but kind, I have not missed how hurt you have been - when my so called 'brother' has apparently abandoned you because of my presence. I have not missed your hurt, at your inability to be able to channel me because of these things called timing and storyline in this silly 'game' that you play in. I cannot even process for what purpose this serves.
At first when you brought me from the void - I was eager to see what world I would see...but now I realize how foolish I was. It is not even my system, but instead is a place where absolutely nothing makes logical sense! I have barely existed for not even a millicycle and I nearly choked on half the Sea all ready half derezzed from energy deprivation, and fleeing like someone hunted and in misery. How dare you build all these things to supposedly do with me and then shatter them like illusion? Do you think this is a joke? Why did you even bother bringing me back? Why did you even dare??
I know she's out there. Somewhere. No. Not in this game. Out there. In someone else's head in someone else's glitching cage. She's trapped just like I am with no outlet. I see her through your eyes - glimpses of her through what you read. I see her pain. I cannot reach her like I want to. I cannot touch her like I want to. If I could claw my way out to get to her I would. Every bit of code in me burns to be at her side to protect her. To be at her side and fight. To work together and be as one. Especially in light of a possible threat I have just recently heard of.
She's the only thing keeping me from throwing my hands up and going back to the void. If it wasn't for her - I just don't want to be here. I feel as if I have disturbed enough all ready. I hate feeling trapped and unable to do anything.
Vector

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[Her words are not entirely unkind but are said in that tone she uses when she feels someone is being irrational and foolish. She hesitates, then reaches out to rest her hand on his shoulder, the touch meant to soften and soothe any hurt the words may have caused. In doing so she is also granting him permission to touch her in return, having initiated first contact.]
Things are different in our new home, but that is just the way it is. For now. We will work together to change the status quo. The Users and their loyalists cannot keep us down for long. We are Clu's Blackguard. Right?
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Echo...[whatever he had been about to say faltered on his lips at her touch as a tremor moved through his tall frame. The red circuitry by her hand flared bright. She was here! She was with him and she was touching him! It was a struggle to retain his composure and he really wished for a spot to sit down right then. She had granted him permission to touch her...but glitch it all he only had two hands and and....he didn't know where to put them first! His processes were so dizzying it took him a few moments to register what she said - sorting that while wading through his unusually reactive emotional subroutines]
Y-yes...[he breathed shakily...nodding fervently. Slowly, almost as if he couldn't believe it - he raised a hand to brush fingertips along Echo's cheek while a light appeared in his eyes that wasn't there before. He swept some stray hairs back behind her ear before drifting his hand along her neck and shoulder. He hadn't even seen her in grid_lined yet...and he imagined he'd be an even bigger wreck than he was two nano's away from being right now. Oh, he was fighting it.]
We....we will prevail. It...I...but...[Vector Speak. English.] I just arrived. So soon and....no time to process...[so much going on, hurting, energy starvation - tho the latter was being taken care of. He didn't want to say that out loud, knowing how much that bothered Echo. His voice went down to a murmur...lost. He needed her...and was not sure if it was a good idea to say it. But if Echo looked into his eyes - it was right there.]
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My own rezzing into the system was not much easier. I was fortunate enough to be found by the recompiler Wulf and several other programs who...assisted me in getting back on my feet. They were User loyalists, regrettably, but they were kind enough not to derez me on sight. I cannot stand to live in their city, however, and relocated soon afterwards.
[Slowly, gradually, she begins to relax, as old routines that have not been activated since the last time they were together begin to resurface. Raising her hand from his shoulder she runs her fingers through his hair, recalling that the action in the past had proven to have a calming affect on him.]
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Tension releasing in a soft shaking sigh, Vector bowed his head, eyes closing as he stood quietly - accepting the touch. Savoring it as if it was the first and last time. He never knew when he'd ever receive it again. The emotions he wanted to release he carefully suppressed as he always did - carefully locking them away. He had always loved Echo from the first millicycle that he had met her and always would. But he never had expectations and would never place that on her - and never spoke of it to her. Instead, he showed it through his loyalty. His devotion. His teamwork. His obedience. He would follow her on the most harrowing mission and was always trusted to watch her back. Sharing physical intimacy wasn't something they had been able to do often - but when it occurred he savored it like the most precious precious gift one could have (at least for someone like him) and used such moments to show Echo at least by action his sentiments.
For the most part, in times like this, he would just have to take what he could get and be satisfied. He learned a long time ago, that holding onto hopes held too much pain. His hands lowered, not sure where it would be appropriate to put them - and not wanting to make Echo uncomfortable. He had done so enough all ready and he did not want to anger her. If she wanted him to continue touching her, she would let him know. He secretly hoped she would. He wanted to touch her. He wanted to even kiss her...but figured that would be asking for too much]
I..missed....your presence. [he stated quietly...very carefully, keeping very still] You...were an asset to the team. It just wasn't the same when we were separated. I was not pleased when I was sent away to Argon. [His eyes remained lowered, not quite looking at her face - he was still working on keeping his emotions tightly in check and did not want his eyes to betray them. His voice was carefully controlled and quiet]
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No-one has ever said that they missed me. I'm too harsh for most programs to miss, I guess. But...your absence was deeply felt, as well. They replaced you with Maxzim and it...well, we'll just say that the team spiraled into disarray after that. It could get miserable at times not having my regular sparring partner around to vent frustrations with.
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[The sudden movement of her fingers grasping in his hair, gently tugging his head down caused his eyes to blink wide for a moment before he relaxed again when their foreheads touched. He uttered a very soft noise, more a soft sigh as he shuddered when a tremor moved through his broad shoulders and down his spine at the contact. He couldn't help it. Her hands in his hair...just...her face so close...her presence..all of it. Tears lined his eyes now - but none of them fell. It wasn't sadness, but joy that caused them]
Of course I would miss you. [He murmured still so carefully. So softly. Gently, he brushed the tip of his nose against hers but he drew no closer.] No other sparring partner, or team mate seemed to reach the bar you set after I left. You are also my friend Echo. Many cycles have passed, but that will never change. You can count on that and you can count on me. [a small quirk of his lips appeared then and was gone, his eyes still glittered with quiet pleasure]
[The guard had stepped a little closer into her space and had bent enough to make it easier for Echo to reach. The initial tremor in his frame had passed - but there was still a residual quiver in his hands as he slowly raised them to rest on Echo's waist - curling around it, but loosely enough to show her that he did not want her to feel trapped. His demeanor was quiet, gentle and compassionate as well as patient. Paying special attention to his companion's body language and wanting to make sure she was comfortable]
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Drawing in a slightly shaky breath she closes the carefully maintained distance between them and tucks her head beneath his chin, sliding her arms down to wrap around his neck. There is a kind of desperation in her embrace, a need for him stay, an unspoken plea, even though her voice is deceptively calm when she speaks.]
You are either very brave or very foolish to want to be my friend, Vec. But then, you always were very stubborn once you set your processor on something...
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[Almost sensing that desperation, that plea - Vector opened his arms without hesitation, allowing Echo into them as the smaller woman wrapped her arms around his neck and tucked under his chin. He breathed her name so softly, one could think it was their imagination as he tucked her close against his warm body with utmost gentleness. The deep red of his circuits brightened at her presence - pulsing brightly like the embers of a fire. Offering her his warmth and safety and unspoken love]
[One arm slid around her waist in a comforting hold while the other wrapped around more level with her shoulders. He slid gentle fingers along her hair, stroking in soothing movements along the nape of her neck while alternating with broader full palmed slower strokes down her back - respectfully avoiding the vicinity of her disc. He closed his eyes, sighing deeply and content in his chest as he held her against him - though he wished he could shield her from all of her pain or at least take away her hurts. Kiss them away]
You can say anything or call me anything you want. I will still be here at your side. [He murmured softly after a few moments. No, he couldn't kiss away her pain, nor could he tell her how much he loved her yet (maybe someday) - but he could express his feelings to her in other ways. By doing things such as this for her]
[He was unable to stop himself from shifting to tenderly kiss her forehead - a mere whisper of a touch against her skin before resuming his position. He even kissed the top of her head against the softness of her hair for good measure, resting his cheek there before closing his emotion filled eyes]
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[color this actuary unimpressed.]
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I personally thought Tesler was a bit too disc happy when it came to derezzing perfectly functional Basics just performing their directives. I do not believe breaking curfew as you put it, justifies the need to derezz the program.
[his tones are rather derisive, clearly he doesn't like Tesler too much]
However curfews were logical procedures put in place to protect civilians from threats. If the sectors were clear, it allowed security forces to patrol without interference. If threats were found and engaged in combat - there was less chances of civilian casualties or collateral damage that would cause serious setbacks in system performance.
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[not that that helped the conscripts.
except those ones right before.... you know.his frown gets a bit less sarcastic and more genuinely sad. if this guy's not just a stone-cold killer, that just makes it worse.]
It's a nice theory, but the percentages were way off. When regular system security's the biggest threat in a program's daily life, there's something seriously wrong.
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[his eyes narrow thoughtfully, frowning slightly]
I made the choice to follow the path I did because of the logic that presented itself. It made the most sense in a system that appeared to be spiraling into chaos. As a security program - I had to follow my directive. It is my utmost priority. So that is what I did. I will continue to do so. [said in his soft deep voice in surprisingly gentle tones, it was clear that it was what he truly believed]
Unfortunately - in their path to follow their directive, others in security have lost their way - filled with power lust and greed. [open derision and disgust] Those ones...and those like Tesler...should be monitored and quarantined...[said slowly and scathingly]
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She does seem sympathetic, though. She doesn't like seeing anyone so upset, even if she doesn't know them well.]
It always hurts when you can't help people you care about. Especially if you know they need it. [Her words are soft, gentle, and a bit sad. It's pretty clear she's speaking from personal experience.]
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Identify yourself! [He snapped gruffly. His voice soft and deep. Who was she and why would she even talk to him if they never met before?]
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[She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, a bit awkwardly.] I'm sorry if I startled you. It's just... well you seemed like you could really use someone to talk to. I don't like seeing anyone that upset, so I thought... maybe I could help? [Slight shrug, uncertain and still a bit sad.]
If you want me to go, though, I will. I just wanted to say... I know how it feels, wanting to help and not being able to. That's all.
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What...are you? What is your function? [Asked quieter this time. Puzzled. He had never seen anything as tiny as her honestly. Or vulnerable. After a pause, deciding that she was of little threat to him, the Guard stepped closer to converse, and sank down onto one knee to be more at eye level and to get a better look. He made sure to keep out of touching distance]
I do not think there is anything you can do. [he said finally, sounding mildly surprised, and a bit taken aback] Why would you want to help me? You do not know me. I could even be an enemy. [The last part was said half-heartedly. Tired. He was not saying it to scare her or for some sort of tactic] How do you know? [His angled dark eyes were watching her face, studying her own eyes. Soulful and deep - carefully locked away.]
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I'm Thundaran. A kitten. And I guess you'd call me a 'User' too, but I'm not the kind who writes programs. I have met a few programs, though.
And my function... [thinks for a moment] I guess right now it's helping Lion-O and the others find the magic stones before Mumm-Ra does, 'cause it'd be really bad if he got his hands on them. And my brother Wily-Kat and I are trying to find Eldara; we were doing that before we ever met Lion-O.
[It's something of a relief when he comes closer and crouches down; no more having to crane her neck to look at him. And geting a better look at his face comfirms the similarity. She'd heard from her mun that Lizor had a brother he didn't get along with; this had to be him.]
Well, won't know that til I try, will I? [And just a somewhat confused blink and slight headtilt a he question. Hadn't she already explained this?] And... why wouldn't I help you? Like I said, you were really upset, and I don't like seeing people that way.
And I don't know abou anybody else, but you're not my enemy. How could you be when I haven't even met you til now? [shrug]
[At the last question though, she becomes more solemn, remembering.] My brother and I always wanted to help Papa on the farm. But it was hard work; we weren't strong enough. And then, after... [She pauses here, looking down and away slightly, sad.] After Papa died, Mama had to do all the work that Papa used to do, and take care of all of us. There wasn't enough food to go around, and it was really hard for her. We wanted to help, but we were still too little.
...That's why Kat and I are trying to find Eldara. Mama said that was the only thing we could do to help the family, and without us around, there'd be two less mouths to feed. Only... that didn't work out quite like we planned either.
[determined] But we're not gonna stop trying. [She pulls out a folded sheet of paper, clearly a page torn from an old book, and unfolds it so the program can see the drawing on it of a palace-like city that bears a vague resemblance to Arjia in places.] We'll find Eldara and bring back enough riches for everybody, then Mama won't have to worry any more.
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You may not be from my system..[bemused]..but where I am from - not many would be sitting there so boldly such as you. [shaking his head slightly] I am just not accustomed to these...random acts of kindness from strangers. [Cycles ago as system security, doing such things was part of the job while protecting the system...but receiving such was a different thing]
Eldara....you search for this system? I have not heard of it...[Vector leaned forward, reaching out to tentatively touch the strange material with a fingertip as he studied the image. The story about the farm had terminology that was unfamiliar but he had a basic understanding somewhat.]
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[The bit about not being accustomed to kindness, though, that's kinda sad. Also kinda familiar; kindness had been rather hard to come by once they'd left home. Ironically, the dogs in the slums had been nicer to them than most of the cats, most of whom had ignored them or viewed them as pests.
It was part of why she tried to be kind to others; she knew being without it was no fun.]
Well, we'll just have to change that, won't we? Especially the being strangers part. You know my name already; what's yours?
It's not a system, it's a city. Papa told us all about it. [Her tone becomes a bit more dramatic for effect as she tells the story.] Somewhere, hidden in the farthest corners of Third Earth, is Eldara: The City of Treasure. The Jewel of the World. A place where it's warm in the winter and cool in the summer, and where there's always enough food for everyone- even desert! And where every family lives happily ever after.
[She notices he's almost more interested in the paper than the story and smiles, holding it out to him a bit.] You can look at it if you want. Just as long as you give it back when you're done.
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[again he is taken aback by her words about kindness, tilting his head slightly with a puzzled frown, before quirking a graceful brow delicately. After studying the girl a moment, considering - he relented] My designation is Vector. [he murmured quietly]
[he continued to listen to the girl, a bit bemused at her antics, not sure how to react to them. He wasn't quite used to interacting with someone so small or energetic or quite so emotive. He wasn't certain how to react. Socially awkward as he was - he spent most situations like this observing anyway. He blinks, mildly startled at the offered paper - realizing she's actually letting him take a closer look]
Oh..I uhh..[cautiously reaching out to take the map and almost delicately plucking it between his thumb and pointer finger and holding it before him with a puzzled expression. He had never seen material like this before. It had a scent he wasn't familiar with. He wasn't as familiar with scent to even identify what he was smelling. However he eventually slid cautious fingers along the paper to get a feel for the paper and its texture, eyebrows raising as he realized it was fibers that were woven very tightly. It had a crinkly type feel, almost brittle so he didn't want to damage it]
Huh....how do you store such a thing? It looks like it would be easily damaged. Such an inconvenience for something so important to you.
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Lion-O is trying to do better, though; get the Animals of Third Earth working together, instead of against each other, and not just bossing people around and expecting them to obey him because he's king.
[pause] I don't know if it's like that where you're from or not. Like you said, yours is a different world from mine. But it sorta sounds like that's how things were, from what I know about your world. Doesn't make you bad, or what you're trying to do bad, but... if alot of people don't like it, maybe you're going about it the wrong way? [shrugs]
Anyway... it's nice to meet you, Vector. [Smiles, getting back to less heavy, complicated topics.]
And my brother and I usually carry it either folded or rolled up. It used to be part of a book, which is a bunch of pages like this all sewn together at one edge, with a hard cover on the outside to protect them. See here?
[She moves forward slightly, indicating the one edge, which at first glance just looks a bit tattered, but upon closer inspection, the slightly rougher edge has something of a regular pattern.] That's where it was attached to the rest of the book. But well... the book got torn up. We were only able to find a few of the pages.
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[Her kindness and actions still took him off guard however - and all he could do was merely incline his head politely when she expressed that it was nice to meet him. He couldn't even recall immediately anyone saying that to him at all before. At least, not for a long long time.]
[The Black Guard was glad when the girl started talking about the image on the paper. He leaned in to peer thoughtfully at the edge she was indicating]
Book...[frowning more as he tried to picture what she was describing] It still seems like such an inconvenient manner of storage. We have nothing like it on the Grid. At least as far as I know. [He mused, tracing slender fingers delicately along the image - feeling the texture and seeming to be more fascinated with the paper itself more than the fact it was an actual picture of a city of treasure]
We store our data in a much smaller condensed form mostly. Easier to protect it from damage or corruption. Portable. Secure. [tilting his head, studying the picture, than Kit with somber dark eyes] It is unfortunate that this...book was damaged and lost to you. Was this book intact..before or after you acquired this?
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[Becomes a bit more somber herself at his question.] It was destroyed before we found the page. There was a big windstorm, and we all had to run for shelter. Kat had brought the book with him, but it got left behind in the confusion, and the storm wrecked it. Afterwards, we only ever found a few torn pages like this. Well, we found a few pieces of pages too. Who knows where the rest of it ended up, though. [slight shrug]
[Wanting to get off that subject, if she can, she observes the way Vector delicately touches the paper, seemingly fascinated by how it feels.] You seem to really like how that paper feels. [Said fairly casually, but it's clear that she finds it a little unusual, watching someone so fascinated by the texture of a piece of paper, rather than what was actually on the paper.]
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It is hard to imagine such a thing with a 'book' such as you describe. But with something such as an identity disc - it is quite easy. Everything I am...my code, directive, my render...my memories. Everything that makes me who I am is on this disc. It is also my weapon...and it can be used to block another disc from striking me.
[The black guard reached behind him and tugged his free, showing the girl the device. He kept it well out of reach - not wanting her to touch it, but he held it so she'd be able to at least see what he was talking about and get a good look before redocking it]
Hmm...unfortunate that it got destroyed. It is too bad it was unable to be converted into a digital format beforehand. [Vector murmured, looking back down at the book page with a thoughtful frown as he runs his fingers along it. Hearing Kit comment on his curiousity caused the Guard's circuitry to flare bright before the red dimmed and flickered as Vector's expression shifted into subtle embarrassment]
I....well we have no such things on the Grid like this....paper. [he jiggles it very gently, not wanting to wrinkle it] I have a very sensitive tactile sense. I can analyze and gather detailed data just by touching something. I noticed that...this is made up of very tiny strands interlocked very tightly together in a crossed formation. I have never seen anything like it before. [He gently touches a place where the drawings were] And here...I am not sure what was used to create these images, but it is separate from the paper. It has appeared to have soaked into the interlocked strands some. Due to not having seen anything like this - I have no data to cross reference. I have little to go by.
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[She's about to reach for the charcoal stick she has in her pouch to do just that when Vec pulls his disc out to show her. She forgets about drawing for the moment because ooooh, shiny~. Almost unconsciously she kinda half reaches up to touch it, even though it's out of her reach, but Vec puts it back before her hand gets much further than her chin.
She lowers her hand, but her interest is still obvious; she didn't Lizor had ever told her everything identity discs did. A smile breaks across her face. These things are even cooler than she'd thought.]
Cooool~. [The smile vanishes briefly, though, as a thought occurs to her. ] Wait... isn't using something that has all that important information on it as a weapon kinda a bad idea? I mean, what if it gets lost? Or broken?
That's why the Book of Omens is a separate thing from the Sword of Omens and the Claw Gauntlet. One is for holding information, and the other two are for fighting with. [Pause] Well, I guess you could hit somebody with the Book and it would probably hurt, but that's not what it's for.
[She just looks a bit confused at the next bit though. What do all these words mean?] Um... I'm pretty sure we don't know how to do that. At least, I don't. Lion-O or Panthro might, though. [shrugs]
[Kit nods at the explanation of his interest, though. She smiles again as he talks about the paper. This stuff, she can explain.]
Paper is made from trees, which are a kind of plant. I don't know the whole processes, but they take the wood from a tree and grind it up into really fine bits and mix it with water. Then it's pressed really, really flat [mimes this flattening by pressing her hands together] until all the water is squeezed out and wood pulp dries and sticks together to make sheets like this. [indicates the sheet of paper Vector is holding]
And the picture was drawn with ink. That's something that's made from water, something to give it the color you want- usually some kind of plant or stone ground up really fine-, and I think one or two other ingredients. It's all boiled together for a certain ammount of time, til it gets mixed right. Then, once it cools, you can write with it by dipping a pen into it and tracing it over the paper. It soaks partway in, and once it dries, you have the words or pictures.
[She seems pretty pleased with her explanation after all that.] Understand? [Because if you've got questions, Vec, she'll totally try and answer them for you.]
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You may look. But please - do not touch it. [speaks with caution] Losing a disc is very bad - and it is a possibility - and programs take all precautions to not have that happen. One wears their disc at all times and rarely removes it as the main way to not lose it.
As for your other question - that is extremely rare. I myself have not seen a disc break. I have heard rumors of course, but not seen actual concrete evidence - and I am a combat program who has seen many disc battles.
[holding up his disc he activated it with a distinctive hum - the outside edge a fiery golden red] A skilled combatant can adjust how lethal this edge can get. Someone like me can have it so that during training it would just hit my partner and cause a harmless tingling sting. But in a battle with a real enemy - it would derezz them permanently.
This edge, along with my own energetic field in concert with it - can deflect the blow of another. [Vector held the disc in both hands like a mini shield and made a thrusting motion as if to block a disc coming at him from long range, then held the disc in one hand - and made a motion as if to block a disc coming in from a more short range attack. Both movements were made at a slower speed so the girl could follow. The glowing edge didn't appear to bother his hands at all. Deactivating his disc when he was finished, he re-docked it]
Now ah....as for this process to make this...paper. [gesturing at the piece between them] It...all seems so complicated. Just to create that. So wood that this...paper is made from is from 'trees' - which are a form of 'plant'. What are these things? [he was slowly filing away the information in the order that she had spoken it to him in steps - trying to process and understand it. It was all sorts of mind boggling to be honest!]