thousand ship launching face in the house!

[wasneverasked]

No. I do not want to participate in any of those "MeeMees". I am the Queen of Sparta. A Spartan Queen does no participate in such foolishness, and I--wait. I am sounding like Clytemnestra. How boring.

Never mind my words! By all means, let us go and enjoy ourselves. However, I refuse to take part in any erotic activities. By order of the Queen, and I am absolutely certain that Menelaus will agree with my decree.

Sincerely,
Helen, Queen of Sparta

Comments

[god_not_goth]

Both royal and godly decrees mean very little here I'm afraid.

[wasneverasked]

You are certain, Lord Hades?

[god_not_goth]

Yes, while neither of my brothers have been seen, there are other gods who would attest to the same.

Each of us brought into these memes.

Then again I think I can appreciate my brothers not being here. If either, although Zeus especially, were to arrive it would likely come to a fight.

[wasneverasked]

What of your wife, Lord Hades?

[god_not_goth]

She has shown herself in two forms but both are alien to me as well as her demeanor.

It would certainly brighten this situation if she were by my side.

[cassie_of_troy]

Poor, lamb. Still railing against the world.

[wasneverasked]

Cassandra. [The sister of the dude who kidnapped her.] How nice to see you, again.

[cassie_of_troy]

No. It really isn't. I'm not at all pleasant.

[wasneverasked]

Well, that is the fault of the gods for making toys of us.

[cassie_of_troy]

Indeed it is. Although I take solace in the fact that I now have gods completely dependent on me.

[wasneverasked]

Ha! Serves the glorified bastards right.

[cassie_of_troy]

And now I remember why I liked you, lamb.

You have a mind.

You always were far too good for my idiot brother.

[wasneverasked]

You are forever a lion, Cassandra. Do not ever change.

If not for but wrongfully taken. Aphrodite lay in same blame for taking me from my Sparta.

[cassie_of_troy]

She was never a particularly smart goddess. All the more reason to fear her. To shun her.

[wasneverasked]

To spite her. Because of her, I was unable to see my beautiful Hermione take her first steps, say her first words, or sing her first song.

[cassie_of_troy]

I know, Helen. And that was the greatest, forgotten, pity of it all.

[wasneverasked]

Nay. The forgotten pity be that your warnings went ignored.

[cassie_of_troy]

Nothing new or original. It's the same where I am now.

Almost the same. Some things have changed.

[wasneverasked]

Hopefully your enemies stay buried when they fall.

[cassie_of_troy]

You would be surprised.

[trojanhorse]

Menelaus still gets a say in the first place?

[wasneverasked]

As my dearest friend and husband, he shall always have so.

[trojanhorse]

Well, I'm certain you're right about him agreeing with you. Though I think this is the first time I've heard you talk about him like that.

[wasneverasked]

I believe that stems from my having only let Cassandra be at my side within Troy's walls.

[cherchezlafemme]

Oh, darling, you don't need his approval. Do as you please, and he'll still follow. He always does. That is the best thing about it, he's so terribly predictable.

[wasneverasked]

[Helen frowns.]

What say do you have to think that Helen of Sparta would treat her Menelaus so terribly?

[She reaches a hand to her neck, where a shard of shell hangs on a string. Her courting gift from Menelaus when they first met.]

He deserves all the more for having raised our little ones while I was held captive in Troy.

[cherchezlafemme]

Held captive? That seems to be all a matter of perspective, doesn't it?

And how exactly was poor, hurt Menelaus raising children when he was off shore for ten years?

[wasneverasked]

[Helen narrows her eyes and furrows her brow.]

Who are you?

[cherchezlafemme]

Helen of Troy. ["Perspective" indeed.]

[wasneverasked]

[Helen's eyes widen.]

I was not aware of another daughter in Troy's house.

[cherchezlafemme]

[Oddly, she's used to things like this already.] Oh, old King Priam had plenty. But I'm not one of his.

[wasneverasked]

Oh.




Are you a grandchild? You look a little old.

[cherchezlafemme]

Hardly. There is another explanation. Think about it for a moment, it'll come to you. As improbable as it may seem.

[wasneverasked]

You are a prostitute?

[cherchezlafemme]

I have been called many things for choosing to leave with Paris. That isn't one of my favorites.

[wasneverasked]

You poor dear. Did Paris steal you, too?

[cherchezlafemme]

That all depends on what you're saying he stole. Did he steal from my husband? Obviously. But stealing me? Well. I don't look at it as leaving Sparta, so much as gaining freedom.

Or I did, once upon a time.

[wasneverasked]

[Helen frowns.]

...I am you in another life, are I not.

[cherchezlafemme]

So it would seem. Between you and I, I don't recall half that devotion to Menelaus. Not until it was useful, in any case.

[wasneverasked]

[Helen looks to her necklace.]

I have always been devoted to Menelaus. He has been nothing but sweet and honorable to me. I remember when we first met, and I came rushing from the fields with arms full of posies and ran right into him. [She folds her arms against her chest.] I had such a smarting lump on my forehead, but he only laughed, helped me up, and returned the posies to my arms.