dear_mun | (no subject)

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canon: marvel comics

(no subject)

Well, if I go somewhere I can probably get some actual-- uhh. Spider. Training...

Which has got to be better than watching YouTube videos of super fights, right? How could it be worse?

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What kind of shit is on youtube?

[DOES HE WANT TO KNOW]

Everything ever caught on a cell phone?

There better not be any of me on--oh, right. Your world's me runs around in that Cobra Commander trenchcoat and jazz. [WELL thank god for small mercies.]

So what's "spider-training"?

Are you really looking for a place to go, kid?

...

You're -- you're not Peter. [ STATING THE OBVIOUS THAT IS HER ]

Training? See, I just assumed the talent lied wholly in genetics.

Uhm. Yeah? Limbo sucks.

I could point you somewhere but you wouldn't be the only spider. And I'm not talking, you running around solo as Spider-Man getting your tuchas handed to you with me surveying as the great father-giving-away-his-daughter thing either.

[ what ]

I- [OH GOD A...WKWARD....] I'm. Not. No.

Genetics are great but I would also like for people to stop kicking me in the head...

No natural reflex of just whipping out an arm and breaking ankles?

You sound so great at the title you took on. Really.

You're wearing a quilt.

[BEAT] I don't know. Training on how to be a better Spider-Man I guess?

[JESS WHY] I... don't even know what that means...

Okay, that's oddly specific.

Wow. I'm working on it. [RUDE]

[ okay she's confused but she can deal with this she guesses oh god oh god ]

Who are you?

[ awk.....er.... more awk.... ]

Oh. Uh.

Well, where I am, Spider-Man's alive. So you know.

[ W/E SPIDER-LAD!! ]

It might be. And hey, it's pretty offensive to take on the identity of a dead man.

Hope that helps.

[not... dealing as well...] I- I can't tell you that!

[STARING AT] Alive?

[BEAT] What?

Yeah. I mean, he's not the one you know -- knew, I guess. [ hhh... ]

But he's still Spider-Man. Just older. I don't know if that'll make a difference for you. [ ggghh this is so freaking awkward ]

[god everyone points that out SOB] I don't- I didn't mean. [huff] Nick Fury said I could.

If the choice were "vibrational protection suit slash quilt" or "take a compressed ten-point-zero-Richter-scale-earthquake to the bones", which would you pick?

[winces visibly]

I've fought him like thirty times, I'm a fucking expert.

Oh. Well. Nick Fury is a moronic prick, so I'm not surprised. [ wh OOPS BACKING UP BACKING UP ]

I meant. I wouldn't listen to him, if I were you.

Reed, shove it. The kid's trying to do good. Encourage it.

Eh, you're doing the best you can. I had absolutely no clue what I was doing the first year either.

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