on a meme that spawned the au/psl from hell (in his mind)

[therealgenius]

Look, honey. Babe. I'm really glad you like me. Just putting that out there. I don't get enough people liking me anymore, so I'll take what I can get. But.

This wasn't part of the agreement, sweetcheeks. We're supposed to be working together. You know, a team? [Like the Avengers, Justin?] I'm really, again, like, you know, thrilled to be working with you. But there's this thing where it stops being teamwork and starts being...uh, the opposite of teamwork. What is that called?

So, you know, the whole letting Loki Assface crash at my place and blow up all the shit in my house when he gets aggravated, making me replace things all the time, you know...okay, I know I have more money than God, but still. How many toasters now? You should really just...you know, enjoy it for what it was. It was kind of funny, I guess. Maybe. To you, I mean, not to me. It wasn't really funny at all, actually. It wasn't what we agreed on.

So you know, ah, uh...the end. No more. No reason for going in that direction again. Just, uh...well, you know, you could always just...stop liking me, I guess.

...I wouldn't mind if you stopped liking me right now, actually. It'd be win/win! I wouldn't have to deal with anymore...humiliation and you wouldn't have to, uh...you can delete these things, right? Deleting would be good. Terminating the contract, as it were. I'd be fine with that.

...okay?

Comments

[disadvantaged]

[ "Loki Assface"? You just get dumber and dumber every time you open your mouth, don't you? ]

I've offered you an opportunity for termination before, Hammer.

You seem rather opposed to the idea, as I recall.

[therealgenius]

[NO YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO STAY ON MEMES HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE WORLD OF DWRP JUST YET NOOO BLOCK BLOCK BLOOOOCK

man this is worse than myspace]

Uh...it was different, though. You know...it was.

It was just different.

[disadvantaged]

[ Only Loki can manage to make something so simple as tilting one's head look so utterly sarcastic. ]

Different.

Requesting details, if you'd indulge them. As you've already proven yourself in abundant possession of such elaborative powers.

stop giving me the fart icons i just had baked beans

[therealgenius]

[Augh, why. Why does this happen? What did he do wrong?

...oh right. Minor villain and all that.]

Mmm...no details that I can think of, so none to detail.

nope also wow fart jokes on d_m too CLASSY

[disadvantaged]

[ Minor, throwaway villain who no one likely even remembers from Tony's movie. At least Loki has legions of fans in his favor. You've just got a tacky pair of glasses and an incredibly grating stutter. ]

Purposely concealing information, are we? [ The flicker of a venomous smile. ] Surely you know better than to even make the effort by now.

Don't you mean...GASSY?

[therealgenius]

[Oh God, shut up. The only reason you have fangirls is because you're played by a cute English guy who was in some movie where he was naked and also because EMO MISUNDERSTOOD and also...Snapewives are now Lokiwives or something JUSTIN IS THE WINNER AGAIN]

Uh...no? There's not much to conceal, I mean...there's just, uh.

...nothing to say.

this is not happening okay just stop

[disadvantaged]

[ Justin Hammer: 1. Loki "Assface" Laufeyson: 4,567,231.

Enjoy that uphill battle of yours, dude. ]

I still fail to see how my visage in any way resembles that of a donkey.

Fun scientific fact: the planet Uranus is a gas giant.

[therealgenius]

[He'll take it.




HAHA OH MAN THAT'S A LOT OF NERVOUS LAUGHTER THAT SOUNDS LIKE IT COULD BE MADE INTO A WORD OR TWO IF IT WASN'T SO NERVOUS


CAN YOU GO AWAY NOW




Seriously now he understands all the Tonys telling him to go away GO AWAY

SHOO


TAKE THE FERRARI IDGAF JUST GTFO OK]

what if like... my ass is as big as a planet

[disadvantaged]

[

















LOKINOPE.avi

Enjoy trickster continuing to hover in your space, looking as charming as ever. Because that's just how he rolls. Infuriatingly, with no regard for your personal comfort level. ]

I need to get some quarters - brb

[therealgenius]

[...]

Did you brush your teeth this week?

RIDE THE LIGHTNING

[disadvantaged]

[ Squinting. ]

And what is the meaning of asking this question, exactly?

You mean your horse son, right?

[therealgenius]

...just.

Your breath is right in my nose, so, you know...make a joke about bad breath, get you back off. Win/win.

of course

[disadvantaged]

[ ...hm.

Subtly taking a whiff of said breath. ]

I detect no stench.

He's so hot right now.

[therealgenius]

That's nice.

I still stand by you backing off.

licks........

[disadvantaged]

You enjoy considerable fortune to remain standing at all.

[irondick]

[ enjoy a text, because that's all your getting from him hammer... ]

[therealgenius]

[YOUUUUU SUCK

gdit

Checking text now]

[irondick]

[ all it says it 'you suck' ]

[therealgenius]

[AHJDKLFHADSKJFDS HE DOESN'T NEED THIS SHIT

HE THROWS IT ON THE GROUND]

[irondick]

[ MORE TEXT SPAM OF 'YOOOU SUCK' ]

[therealgenius]

[Oh wait


vibrate


his phone is on vibrate

suck it, man]

[irondick]

[ not anymore....

mad hax skils... ]

[therealgenius]

[brb - crying in the shower while Loki's killing children]

[irondick]

[ my job is done... ]

[therealgenius]

[yep

dead kids, good day for iron man]