voice testing.

[flagg]

Well, c'mon, lil pardner, don't I get a real face? A nice big grin, all the chompers I can call my own — why, what was it that dullard said about me? I look like anybody you meet on the street. Yes, I do! Any face, any face at all! Step right up, don't be shy! Just so's long's there's a smile. You know me. Easy to please, both myself and others.

And I like this little game of ours. What an adorable little stand-off we have here. Maybe you can get in my head, maybe you can! It's been done, I won't lie. I certainly don't even have a piece-a crap tin foil hat at the moment. You got me dead to rights, officer, and confiscated all my toys. So here I'll stay, as you please. Bide a while. Get to know you. How's that? We'll be friends real soon. I know it.

Comments

[wontturntofoam]

How do you speak if you do not have a face?

[norea]

What a terribly laid-back approach you have.

[flagg]

That is for sure one of life's conundrums, my friend. I also used to wonder in what orifice exactly sailors wanted to fuck mermaids.

[flagg]

I know when I'm beat, sister. No doors, no roads, no friends. Nothing but my pretty little self in a dark little cage. What could I possibly do?

Then again, here I am talking to you. Now that must be some kind of blessing, hallelujah amen, say true.

[wontturntofoam]

I--

[Well, it's a little alarming that you went directly there.]

I was not aware that that was a thing which... sailors desired to do. But surely you yourself know how it is that you are capable of speech?

[viraltentacles]

Being optimistic, are you?

[flagg]

Shirley, that's a good one, I've never been a Shirley before! I could be a be-yoo-tiful lady if I put my mind to it, I bet. What d'you think, buddy?

[norea]

Is it, now? I'm afraid I can't do much to remedy your stand-off, but far be it from me to cast a shadow on a man's blessing.

[wontturntofoam]

I don't think even the finest lady could be beautiful if she didn't have a face.

[flagg]

Rose-colored glasses, that's me. And if I do say so myself, that is a handsome outfit you've got there, partner.

[flagg]

Ah, but there's plenty a man who'd walk ten miles on their knees to let your shadow fall on any part of them, isn't there? Can't say as to whether I'm one of them, we only just met, but I can imagine! I can indeed.

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

...I share headspace with someone who is, in a very meta way, kinda scared shitless of you.

[viraltentacles]

...It's not an outfit.

[flagg]

You're a particular gent, and I can't fault you that one. But faces come and go, my dear — many parts of the body do, yes! — and that is the gospel truth. In my experience, I've found there's nothing people find more attractive than a big ol' smile.

[flagg]

Well, now, I find that interesting. Won't you regale me? Pass the time? I do so love a story.

[viraltentacles]

...No. [He's not one for talking to strangers.]

[flagg]

Implying, of course, that you yourself are not. Which is only wise, kiddo, and I can tell you are indeed wise beyond your years. Nothing to be scared of here, may I be stricken down if I tell a lie.

[flagg]

Not much one for words, eh? I knew a man like you, once. That's fine, that's fine. Different strokes. But you did come, sir, you did come to speak to me. I find that curious, is all.

[viraltentacles]

I'm just bored is all.

[norea]

—that might be true, you'd have to ask them. But you strike me as the sort, if you don't mind a stranger saying, who doesn't need to indulge in that kind of thing.

[flagg]

Two prisoners in the clanky, then. Very fine. Won't you even tell me what you're in for? Don't be selfish, friend!

[viraltentacles]

As my mun puts it, "He's am an unstable, sociopathic, eldritch abomination. So why wouldn't I play him?"

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

Me? Afraid? [Snort.] Nah, this head-space room-mate of mine? She says you and she come from the same creator.

[wontturntofoam]

I do agree with you about that, but surely one needs a face, in order to smile? Otherwise there would be naught but the expressionless baring of teeth, which I tell you from experience, is not much like the smile of an attractive human?

[flagg]

If it's a need, it's not much of an indulgence, is it? I can play that part, I can play many parts. I have, yes. I have been a man on my knees many a time. Do you think you could bring me there, darling?