(most likely homeless forever because what) Potential fateverse spoilers in comments, ahoy!

[allpurposekitchenknives]

Don't worry, Mun dearie, there's an easy way to solve your problems!

What are you talking about, you ask? Oh, I think you know exactly what I'm talking about. You just don't want to consider it.

Well, in the end, it's up to you!

Comments

[eighteen_winters]

Your the Grail...?

[allpurposekitchenknives]

"Hello" to you too, Illya dear.

[eighteen_winters]

...What kind of horrid magic is this?

[allpurposekitchenknives]

You'd have to ask your grandmother and her friends for the details, since I wasn't born quite yet.

They might be hanging around, since this place doesn't have much in the way of timeline coherency!

[celloknight]

........................

[allpurposekitchenknives]

[celloknight]

.....................................Gross...

B-but cute......

[allpurposekitchenknives]

"Gross"? That's a little mean!

But I'll forgive you for the compliment.

[chaos_that_crawls]

Your mun will seek it out in time. She may not choose to do so, but the temptation always lurks in the deepest shadows. Listen to the whispers.

[allpurposekitchenknives]

Or maybe they'll just crash and burn, first. We'll see!

[chaos_that_crawls]

Don't tell me that isn't also a desired result.

[thekingisnotalone]

I was aware that the Grail was not a drinking vessel, however this was not the form I had expected it to take.

[allpurposekitchenknives]

That makes me wonder what you were expecting, Rider dear.

[thekingisnotalone]

Something less animate, perhaps.

[metallic_corruption]

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH. SUCH CORRUPTION... ALL THE EVILS OF HUMANITY ARE PRESENT HERE IN THIS VESSEL. I SHALL CONSUME YOU AND INCREASE MY POWER A HUNDERED FOLD!

[allpurposekitchenknives]

[And the mun does not even have any idea who you are, oops.]

Do you really think it will go that well?

[puppy_lancer]

Hey Grail! I got a wish for ya!

[Lancer doesn't particularly care that this "Grail" is more soiled than Medb's underpants, nor does he care that both of them will still be homeless after this. He just knows that he finally has a wish.]

[allpurposekitchenknives]

Oh, really? Then I suppose I can hear you out, Lancer dear.

[Though he can't guarantee he'll be able to help you, given the place they're in. Hehehe.]

[puppy_lancer]

My Master. Misaya Reiroukan. Save her--cure her of her curse.

[He pauses.]

Or, at least, make a cure possible in whatever universe she goes to.

[thefineprint]

Humans aren't usually willing to take the most efficient route when it comes to getting what they want. They're quite strange like that.

[SHRUG. hey fellow wish-granter hey]

[allpurposekitchenknives]

['Sup.]

I wouldn't call them "strange" so much as "silly", but... I guess they would be, from your point of view.

[thefineprint]

"Silly"? That's one word for it, I suppose, but its meaning is somewhat harder for me to grasp.

[More emotional concepts... He's never going to understand them.]

[fujigglephysics]

...I wish to stop my suffering.

[allpurposekitchenknives]

Oh, do you now? I can't really grant wishes normally here, but I guess I can help you out a little. Your problem isn't very hard to solve at all, hehe.

[Here! Have a kitchen knife stuck into the ground next to your feet.]

Just use this, and cut out the silly heart that's making you feel so bad in the first place.

[fujigglephysics]

[Looks at the knife.

Then to the grail.

Back to the knife, and then to it again.

.....UHHHH....................]

...erm, no thanks. I'd rather keep on living. A-and that's really not what I meant...