Kaidan Alenko (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
virmires_ashes) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
dear_mun2012-04-10 10:45 pm
virmires_ashes) wrote in dear_mun2012-04-10 10:45 pm
Entry tags:
AU Kaidan | Spoilers for ME3 possible?
You know, I've only been alive consciously for a couple months now... still can't believe it's been three years since I died on Virmire.
People say a lot can happen in a year. Well I missed three.
And they weren't wrong. People I thought I knew changed. The people I shouldn't be trusting are the ones trying to save the damn universe from the reapers now and-- even though I know I have to stop Shepard, for Earth, for everyone, still doesn't make it hurt any less.
(ooc: As the subject says this is an AU'd Kaidan, something I'm trying out. A brief run down of his AU is on his profile. Apologies for the lack of icons, still making more ;-;)
People say a lot can happen in a year. Well I missed three.
And they weren't wrong. People I thought I knew changed. The people I shouldn't be trusting are the ones trying to save the damn universe from the reapers now and-- even though I know I have to stop Shepard, for Earth, for everyone, still doesn't make it hurt any less.
(ooc: As the subject says this is an AU'd Kaidan, something I'm trying out. A brief run down of his AU is on his profile. Apologies for the lack of icons, still making more ;-;)
no subject
"He"? ...Cerberus.
no subject
The Illusive Man, yeah.
[For as much as he knew he should be doing... something to stop Shepard, he found it more awkward than not being on opposite sides of things now. Even if this wasn't his Shepard, they were still in essence the person he'd known, the person he'd been friends with, served with to fight for the lives of countless beings. The person he had died for to make sure that they succeeded in stopping Saren.
He wanted to be mad, but part of him couldn't do it.]
You know, I wanted to believe it was all a lie, that he wasn't right. But I've seen it, Shepard. He's shown me what you've done to sabotage them. They've changed, why can't you see that?
no subject
Son of a bitch.
[This hurts more than anything else. She remembers what happened on Horizon. Every last word, every last hurt tone of voice, all of it. And to see him becomes this is... it's beyond words.]
[She looks away. She doesn't make eye contact. But the anger boils over in her voice when she speaks.]
"Sabotage"? Is that what they called me shutting down Sanctuary? Stopping Udina's coup? Saving you from Dr. Core crushing your skull? Sabotage?
I'm just getting warmed up.
no subject
Dr. Eva Core?
[This gets a confused look.]
I'm supposed to be helping her get information from the Mars Archives before you can stop us. So you don't destroy the only way we can actually defeat the reapers.
[He's not gone through any of the other things, but he's heard bits concerning them.]
Sanctuary was doing fine last I knew and Cerberus has done an amazing thing there. Helping all those people. And coup? What coup? Udina has been working from inside the Council to try and make them see sense about what you're doing, Shepard. He's trying to save lives.
All the while it seems you're just trying to end them. Where's the Shepard I knew, the Shepard I fought along side?
no subject
[This isn't him. It's the Reaper tech talking. It's the Illusive Man taking one of the few good things in her life and ruining it. Shepard swallows hard before choking down her rage. Blind fury won't help here.]
I'm still here. Where's Alenko? Because you're not him. He'd sooner- [The word "die" won't come out.] He'd... end himself rather than become some indoctrinated puppet.
ahdkfj sorry I can't type today, but yes, heart breaking ;-;
[Not true. It wasn't! Or so he wanted to say. But Shepard's words seem to get through to him a little, if only for that moment before Shepard is speaking again.]
I died once for to protect people. On Virmire. [He died for you Shepard. For everyone that you could save. Thinking now that you were working to practically ensure everyone dies it was worse than dying again.]
And you're right, I would do it again if it would keep people safe. But that's not what's going on here. You're the one who's become the puppet, you're letting them control you and you just don't see it.
Legit sobbing going on here because Alenko's my favorite. ;_;
You know me. Everything I ever did, I did to try and make things better than when I found them. [Even giving Toombs the closure he needed.] I know who I am. Do you? Because the Kaidan I know would never work for Cerberus.
So what did the Illusive Man do to you?
We can sit in team Kaidan together /offers tissues
I knew you, Shepard. But after almost three years of being dead, it seems that changed a lot of things. [And he can't look at her now, male or female Shepard, it still hurt regardless.]
I'm working with them because they're the best shot everyone has against the reapers. That used to be you, but now we can't rely on that anymore, and that's something I never though I'd see.
[A hand rubs at one of his shoulders and he'll glance at Shepard, just a little.]
The same he did for you. Gave me a second chance.
Best team, indeed. /accepts tissues
[She still doesn't look at Kaidan. But the fire in her voice has died out at the very least. It's... hard to scream at him. Even if he's indoctrinated, he's still the man she loves. No amount of change can erase that.]
...I never thought you'd be the kind to lose faith in me. We've been through a lot together. I don't care if you're not the same man I went through everything with. You're still Kaidan Alenko.
And I know that even Cerberus can't erase that completely.
I must sleep but more feels later 8'D
[Cerberus isn't letting him see it.]