GUESS WHO'S BACK

[bullamongstags]

You gonna stop those bloody boat jokes now?

[WHY DIDN'T YOU TO GO WINTERFELL AND SEE AR--]

It's been a long time. Things weren't how they were. But ... dunno what's gonna happen next, do I? Let's just swing the hammer and then see what happens

Comments

What a boat it?

[hextraterrestrial]

[A gray and green carrier pigeon flutters down to the fortification wall. With utmost haste, the wax sealed message is delivered to the castles Lord. After visual inspection of the seal and insignia, the Lord unrolled the scroll and began to read thusly:]

"It has taken some time to assess the vastness of the lands. Even more time was needed to sort the myth from fact. The last third of time was completely devoted to suspension of disbelief; that is to say, to come into a firm foundation of faith that the lore and legends of the land were not simply children's fairy tails. Our verification of the legends was only achievable by personal experience on the field (As Lanister scribes, ((among others)) are notoriously known for exaggerating the truth of matters). The farthest borders are now known and are being mapped. The battlefields have been defined and sanctified. The war-priests proclaim that the very land cries out in thirst for the blood of our sworn enemies. At the time of receiving this, the celestial Gods should be nearing alignment in conjunction with the moons eclipse. The time is nigh for action."

[lurkerwolf]

Long time, no seen for sure. I don't know if it's good or bad how this things seems to drag you right back into it.

[bullamongstags]

Better than sittin' around makin' weapons for the Lannisters.

[lurkerwolf]

Perhaps so. But then again, things may quickly go really bad just as you come back.

[bullamongstags]

[...]

You're a cheery bugger.

[lurkerwolf]

It's called experience. But sure you may be luckier while my show is ending this season. And knowing how messed up things gets... my hopes aren't high.

[bullamongstags]

Yeah because my show ain't the one that kills off everyone's favourites

[JUST A LOOK. He knows his chances. He's not hopeful]

[lurkerwolf]

Maybe you'd have been better of rowing. [Have a wolfy grin, although he's painfully aware that his chances are thin, with how many times he has been close to death.]

[bullamongstags]

Next one who says that gets a hammer to the face.

[roughedge]

Got tired of rowing did ya?

[bullamongstags]

[...]

Where's the damn hammer?

[roughedge]

Can't take a joke ey?

[bullamongstags]

Heard it too many times.

[roughedge]

Classic jokes never gets old.

[bullamongstags]

Unless you're the one hearin' 'em.

[roughedge]

That's half the fun though.

[bullamongstags]

No. It's not.

[unkeptsecret]

So...

Welcome to House Baratheon nephew. It's cosy if not a slight bit bloody.

[bullamongstags]

Who're you?

[unkeptsecret]

Dead men do not have titles nor names. But if you must know, I'm Renly of the House Baratheon, First of His Name, King of the Andals and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, and Protector of the Realm.

You're Robert's bastard are you not?

[bullamongstags]

[...That's a long title]

Oh. Right.

One of 'em. So I've been told.

[unkeptsecret]

[Most of it is just claimed...]

The last remaining one I've been told. It does warm my heart to not see the House go extinct. [And that Stannis didn't get to sacrifice yet another family member.]

[bullamongstags]

Not like I'm legit.

[unkeptsecret]

And I'm supposedly the result of incest. Didn't stop me from claiming the crown from underneath my brother. Alas when there's no legit heir left, bastards must step up to the occasion. You still have Baratheon blood in you, that you were result of an affair does not matter. It's quite backwards how we treat your kin. In other places you might have a seat on the royal court even as a bastard. What matters is that you've the support of the people and the bannermen.

[bullamongstags]

[...]

Don't have either of those.