Really Shaky Voice Testing; planning to app to Soulgemmed

[eatdavesbabies]

Alright. So I think there's something you're not getting.

Wishes aren't something Striders make. We pull off miracles our own damn selves. We have fucking shelves dedicated to them. We want riches we don't get on our hands and knees and pray, we go to the back room and break that shit out of the little tupperware containers we have them in.

....Dave's fine. He's a big boy now.

Dude can take care of himself.

Comments

[ironicoolly]

[Flatly, because let's just try our damndest to ignore everything else here:] The wish isn't what it's cracked up to be, anyway.

[eatdavesbabies]

Ain't nothing for free, little man.

[Seriously. What'd you expect Dave? You made a wish you regret then that's on you bro.]

You get any mileage out of the one you made?

[ironicoolly]

Nah.

["It was a dumb wish, anyway," he doesn't say, because the last thing he needs is Bro asking him what he wished for.]

I figure I'm basically doing this whole magi shtick for free.

[eatdavesbabies]

Damn bro, chances are you're just letting dollars fly by you. Could be making bank with some fucking sick magic tricks, instead of just hoofing it for free.

[Are you okay there? How have you been? You been able to take care of yourself? What are you doing? Fuck you're older than when he last saw you. He misses you.]

Sounds like this place is some shit. You having trouble bro, or are you a big boy who's taking care of business?

[Goddammit. He meant for there to be a little concern here but. Fuck it. He's not going to change what he said. Dave gets it and knows what he means. He raised him to.]

[ironicoolly]

[That sure is a loaded question if he's ever heard one. Of course the answer is the latter. "Yeah, I'm having trouble" basically isn't an option that's even on the table.

His reply is automatic, almost to the point of being robotic.] Holding down the fort just fine over here. Hell, I figure it's practically my fort now. I mean it's been, what, four years now since you've been around?

[Wow, that came out a little more bitter than he anticipated it being.]

You can go ahead and tell your player he ain't gotta worry and all that shit.

[eatdavesbabies]

[Bro listens. And gives a little nod. That's it. That's his little man. That's the champion he raised from Pampers to pizza. You shouldn't need anything from a single other goddamn person. Good Dave. Good for you.

Four years.

He's been gone four years. That's how much time he has to catch up on. Jesus, Dave is seventeen at this point then. Like fuck does the dude know for sure how to even take care of himself at that age? Are you shaving? Do you know the kind of swagger you ought to have? ...Holy shit has he had 'the talk'? Does he need to give you the talk Dave? He wasn't fucking ready for that when you were thirteen how the hell is he going to tell you that awkward shit at seventeen?]

Worrying isn't part of the equation.

Where you're at, that's the place that's about to worry. We're about to open the fucking Strider gates tenfold on that bitch.

[That bitterness in Dave's voice just rolled off his back. That's normal. It's a normal part of growing up, Bro is sure.]

[ironicoolly]

[Oh. That "we" sticks out to Dave like a goddamn sore thumb, and he really... doesn't want to try to process what that means for him. How he feels about that.

So what if Bro's dangling the possibility that he might be coming in front of you? Don't think about it. Don't feel a thing about it. As usual, he's probably just testing you; trying to get a gauge on how you'll react. Whether or not you'll be able to keep your cool.]

Thought you said you didn't do wishes, Bro.