as good of an idea as this voice test is!!

[faeth]

Alright, let’s you and me get down to business! And if you could please save all of your questions until after I finish with these instructions, it'd be appreciated muchly. (Remember, mate! Set your phone to vibrate! And don’t forget to pick up a flier and some more refreshments on the way out.)

So as I was saying, in Dodgeball: The Musical, we'll have chairs scattered all over the gymnasium floor, okay? Like musical chairs, except not only will you be responsible for sitting down when the music stops, you’ll also be responsible for trying to take the other members out while the music's still playing. W-with the ball, of course...

That's where things get interesting, you see, there's strategy involved. You also have the choice to use the game ball to knock over a chair instead of another player. Once that happens, that chair is like hot lava. You can't touch it! But watch out—if you knock a chair over with your body, it’s an instant out! Hit the benches, son, you're going home! Besides that, it's Battle Royale, every man for himself!

...B-but to be honest, DB:TM is still in its planning stages, so I can’t really say anything about the collateral damage risk... I-I figured that we'd cross that bridge once we get there...

For now, let’s teach you the best way to throw a dodge ball—! I'm kinda proud of my technique, if I do say so, myself. It’s all in the wrists, you see, and there’s a little bit of hip movement, but it’s nothing you shouldn’t be able to handle. Although it looks rather special, all there is to it is this small (but vital!) heel rotation at one-hundred-forty degrees that you have to pull off, and then it’s really just—

. . .

… w-why are you ducking your head like that?

Comments

[repelling]

[ ...

Just having a moment of relief that the aim isn't to take the other members out with the chairs. ]

[faeth]

[ well of course not!! because then that'd be dodgechair!! ]

Ah, hey, hey, Ishida-kun! What a lucky happenstance, I was actually hoping for another witness.

[repelling]

[ Let that term never be given life through spoken word.

Witness is... an ominous word. ]

To... Dodgeball: The Musical?

[faeth]

No, to my throwing arm, of course... I-I still feel a little guilty over that one time that we've promised to conveniently blot out should it be mentioned in everyday conversation, and I thought I could make it up to you by showing you my progress.

1/2- EW SEMI ICON REDUNDANCY (re: my first tag)

[repelling]

[ Yes, of course, her throwing arm.

Her throwing arm.

He isn't afraid! How ridiculous. The pause has nothing to do with "that one time" and everything to do with something he hasn't thought of yet. ]

[the_whitequeen]

Dodge ... ball?

[faeth]

Mmm! It's perhaps one of the fiercest contact sports out there. A little like football, or pro wrestling, or politics.

[the_whitequeen]

[ Politics? ]

That sounds interesting ... though I have to admit that I never played a lot of sports as a child ...

[faeth]

[ it's the fiercest contact sport out there ]

Eh-heh, is that so? Well, that's not so bad, either... To be honest, I remember spending a lot of my childhood chasing dragons.

[whitemoon]

Is... is that a real game, here?

[faeth]

... Well, not yet. I'm having a little trouble getting it through the school board. Apparently we'll need permission slips and parental signatures for some inexplicable reason that they've yet to really disclose to me...

[whitemoon]

Well, it does sound a bit dangerous. Can you imagine how many clumsy oafs will trip over the chairs and fall flat on their face? You have to at least consider some precautions.

[faeth]

W-we could always try padded flooring? I'd suggest we play it somewhere with soft carpeting, but the last time I tried playing it in a living room...

[t34l_just1c3]

DODG3B4LL? WH4TS TH4T?

[faeth]

A game of dodging balls...? [ ...lol ] It's a battle of wits, skill, and sheer force of will and maybe a touch of desperate prayer at times when things get really rough...

... Or, as my gym instructor likes to call it, "I-Know-You-Don't-Mean-To-But-Aim-Above-The-Belt-Inoue!!"

[t34l_just1c3]

OH WOW
TH4T SOUNDS H3LL4 FUN!
HURL1NG B4LLS 4T P3OPL3 S33MS TO B3 4 GR34T W4Y TO R3L13V3 SOM3 STR3SS!

[faeth]

I mean, usually you'd squeeze them (like stress balls!) but you know... If you apply the same amount of force, I guess it doesn't matter which direction the ball actually goes in the end...?

[ ... except that probably completely ruins the whole purpose of a stress ball, in eliminating agitation before it hurts someone else. ]

/hides face with ridic tags

[rukia]

[ Always something new to learn but hey this is kind of reminiscent of childhood. Rukia winds up, pitches, and...yeah that dogeball?

Musically crashing through the far window...

The guy who she was aiming for looks like he feels very lucky the window was not his head, however... ]

It seems I need to work on my aim.

[ Understatement...

...wait was that guy Ishida?

...welp. ]

edits forever can't stop me

[repelling]

[ HE WOULD LOOK MORE RELIEVED

(EVEN THOUGH HE HADN'T EVEN BEEN PLAYING KUCHIKI-SAN)

IF, WHEN HE STEPPED BACK TO FACILITATE DODGING, HE HAD NOT TRIPPED INTO A CHAIR

AND ALSO IF

THERE WASN'T GLASS CURRENTLY

IN HIS FACE ]

kufufufufufu

[rukia]

[ Rukia has another ball already from god only knows where. She's got it under her arm in fact as she trots over to inspect the damage she caused. UNFAZED as...she wasn't the recipient...that probably helps...she reaches out to dust some glass off of his shoulder...matter of factly. ]

Well that was close.

[ 8D CHEER UP ISHIDA. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN YOUR FACE... ]

8)

[repelling]

[ Jerking back from her touch, he protests. ]

Close? I wasn't playing!

[ He isn't sorely tempted to snatch her ball and throw it at her, no of course not, that would be ungentlemanly.

Brushing off his own shoulder, thank you. ]

EVERYBODY VOICETEST

[speedkills]

[Pretty much just this rn]

PARTY VOICETEST IS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT that doesn't even work

[faeth]

[ . . . ]

Oh! Hello, Kurosaki-kun, how are you?

[speedkills]

Um, fine, I think. Did you just say "collateral damage," Inoue?

[faeth]

... Yes...? Well... maybe that's not the right word for it, actually...