dear_mun | Countdown to Netflix Binge

Oh, is that really so bad? It'd be about time, if you ask me. Bit drab and boring, isn't it?

Besides, you're a tough old girl, aren't you? Don't think you can handle it?

It's not your type of you that worries me, actually. Your player seems to have the whole "psychotic shitstain" aspect of you down.

It's the ones who're gonna go all woobie and try to make you seem sympathetic that concern me more. Popular Pasty British Actor Syndrome. [Squints, pauses] Hm. You are looking a little peaky there, Zeb. At least, compared to what I'm used to.

Well, can't fault them for good taste, I suppose. Sometimes even monsters sleep with the lights on.

Besides, I'm not all that bad, am I? We've had fun together, you and I. Well, one of us had fun.

[ He smiles unapologetically and adjusts his lapel. ]

Do you like it? Thought this might be a less garish approach. Bit more respectable, I feel. Puts me up a few letter grades on the villain scale if people aren't laughing at you.

You're still a pathetic little man who can't stand other people having free will, and uses his super-powered BO to control them.

Which, in case you haven't noticed, I'm 100% immune to now. Wonder if your jaw is as glass-y as the purple you.

Oh... Oh you are, aren't you? That is lovely. I knew I picked a good one when I settled for you. I wonder if your friends've got your immunity. You have got so many these days. Little miss popularity, aren't you? And that brat of yours? How's her psychic training going?

[ He spreads his hands, the universal sign of being unarmed. ]

But, you've got me cornered, I'm afraid. Bogeyman can't scare the once great and lustrous Jewel.

But that's another medium.

I think my creator's got a thing for me. Gets me in all the A-list books. And now an adaptation.

Can't say I was expecting that news. But it'll be fun seeing another me beat the crap out of another you, eventually. Murdock's stayed pretty close to the source material, guessing mine won't veer too far, either.

And I did eventually get to see what extensive bruising looks like on a natural purple skintone.

And I look forward to seeing what new games we can get away with on video. I do so fondly remember our time together, and it's time everyone else got to enjoy it right along with me. Might even break out the lotion for that one, or invite some company over.

[ He snorts at her and rolls his eyes. ]

Please, don't act like it was some bloody conquest. I let my guard down and you took advantage. Not like you're a tactical genius or anything of that sort. You're not even close.

[And yep, wow, you have the creepy down, A+, that can't be an easy muse to have]

And yet, you couldn't keep me under your control. So what does that say about you? Especially since your revenge attempts fell flat, too. Couldn't even get your old favourite pet to heel.

Think that gets to other-you? All those months, everything he did, and I'm not broken.

((ooc: Could be easier, but he's got a way of getting in your head. ))

You were for quite some time, as I understand it. Got yourself a little problem as I've heard it. Can't have been good for the baby.

[ He sneers over at her. This isn't as much fun for him anymore. Luckily, his mun doesn't care. ]

My mistake was letting you off your lead. You were perfectly complacent until I trusted you to do something simple, and you fucked even that up. Setting a sterling example, aren't we? Jessica Jones, seasoned drunk and professional fuckup.

You should be thanking me, you know. Without me, no one would even know you exist. It was me who put your face in watercolour on those covers, you know. If not for me, you'd still think you were making a difference in that ridiculous costume of yours when you weren't even a blip on SHIELD's radar.

I think it was gauche and mixed media, technically.

And it was still your fuckup. What kind of villain doesn't know the current Avengers roster? Or, you know, that Daredevil had never even been on the team?

Sending a brainwashed pet to attack the most powerful superhuman team on Earth 'cause you threw a tantrum. What a way to lose your prize showpiece.

The roster changes so often, who the hell can actually keep up? You've heard they let that ugly maniac with the swords and talks to himself in? Seems they're willing to put just about anyone in anymore. Well, except you, of course. Wouldn't be long until that idiot in the red pajamas would crash that party. Or at least you could've found out someone who knew him. What the hell good were you, then?

[ Yeah, he might still be bitter. What're you going to do about it? ]

No, I haven't got to justify myself to you. Especially not to you. Who the hell do you think you are trying to lord yourself over me? Barely worth the ink you're printed with. Haven't even gotten a name for yourself, and you'd fade back into obscurity if it weren't for your husband, anyway. He's about the only good thing about you.

Edited 2015-11-16 23:09 (UTC)

[What's she going to do about it? Savor that steeped bitterness like a lovely cup of tea. The thing about spending all that time with him, she knows what he likes... and how to get under his skin.]

At that point, I was only as good as your instructions. If you hadn't done your, as the kids call it these days "entitled manbaby" meltdown you might still have me.

Entitled Manbaby. I like that. Have you considered it over Purple Man?

[ What he wants to do is give her a good slap, but his memory's not so bad, even across dimensions, as to forget what a mistake that would be. ]

About as long as you must've considered 'Putrid Sow' as your new moniker.

The name might not be my choice any longer, but I do rather enjoy the hushed tones that come after it's said. See, the difference is that people actually respect me when they hear my name.

[Oh, she'd very much like to see him try]
You know respect is one of those things that is totally invalid if the people giving it don't have the choice to not give it, right? I mean, I know you're stunted in that "empathy" area of development and all, that groking concepts like that is maybe a little beyond you.

Let's face it, without your smell-me powers, you wouldn't be one of those narcissistic sociopaths with cushy CEO jobs and mind-boggling presidential campaigns, you'd be the kid who wet his bed and set fires and got sent to juvie when neighborhood pets started disappearing. No friends, no job due to creeping out potential employers... You'd have fallen lower than I ever did.

Oh, but the fact is that I very much am comfortable. Not sure how much stock I put into fate, exactly, but I won't pretend that I'm not grateful that this happened to me.

It brought me to you, after all.

[ Ignoring her disparaging ideas of what he might have become, he only smiles at her. ]

Some people are destined for greatness, and others are meant to live as... well let's say you were more attractive as a footstool. At least I kept my shoes clean.

Oh... but look at us! We're circling one another like dogs, snarling and frothing at one another without actually ever saying anything. Eh? You could break my neck anytime you liked... turn my skeleton to dust.

Yet here I stand. Strange, isn't it? I do wonder why that is.

I may be fine changing diapers, but there are some kinds of filth I won't touch.

But I can put on some gloves if you want.

Oh, Jessica. Trying to hide behind that nasty little tongue of yours. No one's impressed. You're not invulnerable, that much I know about you. You're just very good at deflection and making excuses.

When was the last time you ever really had to actually deal with anything you couldn't just bury?

So you're saying you want me to hit you? Because that's what I'm getting here.

[ A smile. ]

See what I mean?

And trying to convince the world you're actually coping, oh that is lovely. For someone who used to be a Private Investigator, you're awfully bad at lying.

Or maybe I just know you too well to be fooled.

[She picks him up by his collar. About a foot off the floor]

Yes. Smart idea. Aggravate the woman you can't control who can throw you off a roof.

[ He'd been running his mouth, so he couldn't be too surprised when she picks him up. He does manage to keep his smile, looking rather amused. ]

Technically, you could.. buuut... I don't think that's going to happen. It's not just you and me here, after all. We've got people playing along, and maybe a small audience who want to see what happens, and say you chuck me off a roof, well, that's boring for everyone.

[Stupid rules. She tosses him to the floor.]

[ Okay, that hurt, but he can easily say he's had worse. She may have jostled something, however. Hard to tell. ]

There's a good girl. See? I don't even need to control you to get you to do things for me.

Countdown to Netflix Binge

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and first episode down

this show's gonna be a ride.

really loving Ritter

perfect casting. She's a wonder.

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