Voicetesting/Canon is "The Martian"

[aspacepirate]

So, you decided on this...because of the AC at work?

...Really.

The air conditioning unit?

(Ooookay.

There have been worse reasons for doing things? Maybe. He has to question where this would fall on the list.

Probably near the bottom.

Like one off from the very bottom.)

Mind me asking what you've been drinking and where can I get some? Because I think I could seriously get on some of that shit. But, first things first...

You're weird.


(ooc: also posted on Dear_Player)

Comments

[toboldly_go]

Air conditioning? Isn't that an old fashioned way for someone to keep cool? Your mundane is interesting to say the least.

[aspacepirate]

(Wait, is that...?

Oh, he knew he had binge watched on too much ancient TV show episodes.

But Captain Kirk?

Holy shit, this was weird.

And not happening. Totally not actually happening.)

Air conditioning? Old fashioned?

It's been around a while, but it's still used. (A slight raise of an eyebrow.) Besides, she claimed that it sounded like a wind tunnel, made her say she must be working for NASA. (And a "heh" sounds.)

[toboldly_go]

[Yep, it's Captain Kirk. Better believe it.]

Well, it's considered a little old fashioned for us, since it's not used much in the twenty third century. We have other ways of keeping ourselves cool. [Better ask Scotty about that one.]

NASA? [When was this guy from?] Might I ask what year do you think this is?

[aspacepirate]

(Pardon Mark for not asking for an autograph, but...well, he was a nerd in high school but not much of a Trekkie.

Also, who the hell in his world would even think that autograph was real?

...

Besides, a five year old.)

Twenty third century? (Alright Shatner. Mark will suspend his disbelief for the time being.) No, it's still the twenty first century.

Yeah, NASA. It's not like the FBI or CIA's been sending manned missions to Mars...well, if there were ever Martian terrorists, maybe, but yeah...NASA.

[toboldly_go]

[It sounds like this guy is lost. It can't be the twenty first century, as Kirk had only beamed down onto this planet moments ago. Was this perhaps a time warp of some kind he had entered? Or had the guy entered one and ended up in Kirk's time?]

I think you might be slightly confused. It is the twenty third century, as I just beamed down off my ship to this planet, wherever this is. You're saying you think this is the twenty first century? Is that where you're from?

[aspacepirate]

(Lost? Well, that wouldn't be an entirely wrong assumption to make. But it will all boil down why he thinks Mark is lost. Who knows what kind of weird "timey-wimey" stuff could have happened.

And now Mark is just going to say "Dammit it, mun...you and your British scifi references. They're...they're rubbing on to me. You nerd. Neerrrd!" in his head over and over.)

Slightly confused. I'm going to disagree with you on this. Like really disagree with you. I am lost. I'm stuck on Mars. But it's still the twenty first century. Trust me I'm a -

(Okay, normally this was where someone would say something like "I'm a -" but he's a botanist who plays with machines or rather an engineer that plays with plants (more accurate for what he was doing, much more). Ah, Bill Murray just went with generic "scientist" - alright. Good enough.)

Scientist.

[toboldly_go]

Your a scientist from the twenty first century? Well, it seems one of us is in the wrong time. [He studied the man and frowned. He seemed sane enough and looked like he was telling the truth. Jim didn't know what to make of it.]

Just to prove that I'm from where I say I'm from, I have my ship orbiting around the planet as we speak. [He flipped open his communicator and signalled the ship.]

Kirk to Enterprise.

Scotty here, sir. Is there a problem?

No, not at all. How far away is the Enterprise from the planet's surface?

[There was silence before an answer came.]

Around three thousand kilometres, sir.

Thanks, Scotty. That will be all.

[Kirk shut the lid of his device and no doubt left Scotty wondering why he had to ask that.]

Do you see? That was my chief of engineering telling me how close my ship is to this planet.

1/3rd of the way through the book and can't put it down

[hforhologram]

Air conditioning?

Who the smeg uses air conditioning in space??? Stick your head out any window, you're disposition will be downright frigid.

[In space, no one can hear you freeze to death. Or listen to the hologram whine about freezing to death.]

It's so good. I'm considering re-reading it already.

[aspacepirate]

In this case, it's not someone in space who is using it. This is someone sitting around on Earth and pushing papers that made the wisecrack.

Then turned it into her justification for bothering me.

(Basically, this is not him.

(He'd rather be on Earth in the summer temps, having a beer, and far away from any sort of disco as humanly possible.)

This is the weird girl (a.k.a. his mun) who is using it.

Whenever he gets out of this mess he's in - he's never using any sort of AC again.)

Yeah, frigid is the nice way of putting it. It's really more like end up entirely frozen and at least two kinds of dead.

can't wait for the movie

[hforhologram]

[Rimmer nods, agreeing with that assessment.]

Could be worse. You could be instantly fried by a radiation leak that takes out the whole crew....and end up a hologram 3 million years later having to deal with the last crew member who has the brains of a goldfish and manners of a baboon.

[Namely: him.]

I will be surprised if it's not good, to be honest.

[aspacepirate]

Yeah, even with a hole in my side and nearly blowing myself up...at least there wasn't a radiation leak. (Yet. He keeps half expecting that one to happen and then he is aware he'll probably have some sort of super cancer.

Well, if it didn't kill him immediately.)

I definitely got lucky with having a crew with no goldfish brained baboons.

(Seriously. They were a good (though kind of stubborn and in some ways weird, but no complaints. None. Not a one.) bunch of people.)

So, mind me asking something? That person...that was you, wasn't it?

[hforhologram]

What gave it away? The fact that I'm deader than disco on a Wednesday night? That I'm a hologram composed entirely of light?

[Sarcasm. Have some, there's plenty where it came from.]

What crew are you with anyway?

[aspacepirate]

Not the first one. It's more the fact you're composed of light. Come on, I have to make sure I'm not imagining things.

(It hasn't happened yet. Which is more than fine with him. He just needs to be sure it's not going to start happening and so far this "headspace" place or whatever it's called? It's really damn weird.

Like maybe he's still in college and surrounded by the pot growing hippies he had to take lectures with?

Or maybe he's actually still dying? Weird in any case. Just plan screwed up.

First Captain Kirk shows up, now a hologram with the ability to be sarcastic.

Maybe he is cracking up.

This does not bode well for the King of Mars.)

I was part of the Ares 3 mission. Am.

wow typo, I blame the fact I'm drinking mtn dew late night

[hforhologram]

[Rimmer does look solid enough, but if Mark has a mind to, he could stick his hand right through his pixels.]

Ares 3? Not the Space Corp, is it?

[Mars, you smeghead]

Ohh, Mars, that's old news. That planet was farmed and sucked dry of minerals ages ago. The Jupiter Mining Corporation is where it's at now.

[Rimmer scowls.]

Or it was. Three million years ago. Who knows what it is now, some kind of fancy resort or vacation planet....or dead like me.