Voicetesting

[tishtosh]

My dear, dear, sweet, darling, dotty little mun...

Have I mentioned that I am not overly fond of incompetent people taking the helm? I'm sure I have, in fact I can vividly recall regaling my crew with tales of ineptitude that I do not ever wish to live through again this very morning.

Now, I understand that for someone of your rather limited attention span paying attention to what someone else is saying for longer than an average of three seconds might be something of a challenge, but it really is imperative that you keep both ears open now because I don't much care for repeating myself.

You are unfit for command and should step down from your post with all haste before you make a fool of yourself and cause trouble for others.

That is all, now hop to it.

Comments

[ophiocordyceps]

I feel obliged to inform you that it won't be as easy as that.

[ It's a cat-woman. Has science gone too far? ]

My apologies.

[tishtosh]

[ Possibly? For all we know Amelia may well be the result of the world's most fabulous laboratory experiment. ]

If you have further information to divulge on the subject I would urge you to do so immediately.

[ Go on, spill the beans, woman. ]

[ophiocordyceps]

[ Her ears move like a cat's, this is the best thing since she discovered that ophiocordyceps unilaterales is what causes the apocalypse! ]

I am afraid your free will has been compromised. You're like a puppet on a string, within little reason.

[tishtosh]

[ Whatever you do, don't try to pet the ears. And don't call her adorable. ]

That is ludicrous! To what point and purpose? Have you been subjected to such vile treatment as well? Do you know of any way to rid ourselves of these blasted puppet strings?

[ophiocordyceps]

[ Caldwell's idea of "adorable" died when the concept of "empathy" did. A long, long time ago. ]

For entertainment. If there was any way out, do you think I would be here to have this conversation with you right now?

[ Rudely staring at the ears, though. Rude. ]

[madangry_madcrazy]

I take it you don't make friends very easily.

[tishtosh]

I think if you pause to consider your words, you will find that what you are doing is confusing being selective about who is worth the effort with having a hard time making friends.

[madangry_madcrazy]

You can't know who makes a good friend or not if you don't make the effort to get to know them, but that's not my point.

[tishtosh]

Then, if you have a point, I suggest you get to it.

[madangry_madcrazy]

My point is you catch more flies with honey than vinegar. That's the saying at least. In reality flies aren't all that attracted to sweet things. It really should be "You attract more bees or wasps with honey than vinegar", but what can you do.

[allseeingtongue]

YOU M1GHT 4S W3LL SHOUT 1NTO 4 BL4CK HOL3 FOR 4LL TH3 GOOD TH4T 4NNOUNC3M3NT W1LL DO

TH3S3 MUNS DO 4S TH3Y PL34S3

1T 1S 4 D3L1GHTFUL G4M3 OF W1TS >:]

WH3N 1T 1S NOT B31NG 4N 3X3RC1S3 1N FUT1L1TY >:I

[tishtosh]

There are some who might feel the same way about your typing. What did the poor alphabet ever do to you to deserve such treatment?

[allseeingtongue]

FOR SH4M3, M4K1NG FUN OF 4 BL1ND G1RL'S TYP1NG

SUCH H4STY JUDG3M3NT

[tishtosh]

[ Welp, that was unexpected. ]

A hasty assumption, at the very least. I'll admit that I was not counting on the possibility that you might not be able to see what you were writing. But would you prefer if I held you to a lower standard simply because some might think that you are at a disadvantage? Clearly you can write, so I must still wonder why you choose to add numbers where numbers should not be.

[allseeingtongue]

H33 H33

YOU 4R3 4 SM4RT ON3! 1 SHOULD HAV3 3XP3CT3D NO L3SS FROM SOM3ON3 W1TH PURRB34ST 34RS

TH3Y 4R3 K33N HUNTR3SS3S

1T 1S MY QU1RK! >:] W3 TROLLS 4LL CHOOS3 4 UN1QU3 W4Y OF TYP1NG TO 3XPR3SS OUR 1ND1V1DU4L1TY

[beyondthenorms]

[...I feel like I've seen you from somewhere before--but where? Ugh, that'll probably come to mind later.]

Hmmm, not off to a good start are you?

Your mun may not quit on you so soon. Don't underestimate them, that's about the best advice I can give you on short notice.

[tishtosh]

She has the memory of a Lethean fuguefish, with any luck she'll have forgotten me by morning.

[beyondthenorms]

Well, if you're sure... And, don't all fish usually have really short memory spans?

Or perhaps that's not the case, in the world you come from?

[To Mari, this seems kinda interesting to ponder. It's always interesting to learn things about other people and other worlds she's not familiar with at all.]

[tishtosh]

It was a metaphor, if you want to discuss the cognitive abilities of various kinds of fish I would advise you to seek out a biologist.

Which, I might point out to save you some time, I am not.

[beyondthenorms]

Nah, not that interested. I was only wondering. [Nodding in thanks for the FYI.] So, what would your profession be if not in biology?

[rattlestars]

You really think they're gonna listen, Captain? From my experience and what I hear from others, you'd win a medal if you did get them to pay attention to what you actually want.

[Also. Hi. Welcome to the club, Amelia. He's not too thrilled with all this either.]

[tishtosh]

Hawkins! So they got you too. My condolences.

[ Hi Jim, good to see you. Well, not really since it means you are also stuck in this utterly ridiculous situation but it is sort of pleasant to see a familiar face. ]

[rattlestars]

Seems like it. I don't know, it's just....weird. But I mean, you're okay, right?

[Because, yeah it is nice to have a familiar face. Even if this is confusing and strange.]

[tishtosh]

Define "okay". Am I in good physical shape and without injuries? Yes. What I also am is unwillingly separated from my life-partner and four children, which to my mind is very much not okay.

[captainbadass]

[Yeah, the cat lady thing gets a mild brow raise, but not much more than that. He's seen weirder. Even in places not here. Plenty of exasperation to go around, though!]

You'll get the point across a whole lot easier if you use the small words. And not a whole lot of them.

Helps with the attention span, you know?