It's somebody's birthday

[scary_music]

Mun-chan! Mun-chan! You remembered Ibuki's birthday! But isn't it a little late for you? Such a night owl!

Ooh, though, isn't it too bad Ibuki can't celebrate her birthday at the Bastion? That's so sad! Where can Ibuki celebrate it? Oh, I know! She can celebrate it here, right? Right! YAHOO~!

Oooh, you have Thanksgiving on Ibuki's birthday? What's that? Ibuki has no clue! Oh, Ibuki knows!

THANKS for GIVING Ibuki a birthday party! No? No, that's not it? Ooh, turkey! So much turkey! We have a holiday like that! On the 25th of December, we have Kentucky Fried Chicken! ... It's not the same? But turkey tastes like chicken, doesn't it? No?

Ibuki hopes she gets lots of her friends at the Bastion for her birthday! That would make Ibuki so happy! Uwah... but they don't do applications today, do they? Oh well! It can be a delayed birthday present then!

[... for general birthday shenanigans assume party hats, balloons, games, cake, whatevers... and especially a karaoke machine.]

Comments

scary reasons! Also, no work phone posts because new carrier has crappy 'net coverage at work...

[scary_music]

Ooh, Gundam-chan is being scary again...

RENAME KEYWORDS IS SO BROKEN i give up

[sthampede]

As the victor, the method of feasting ought to be within my discretion. Moreover, we are celebrating the day of your manifestation upon this mortal plane. Should the first slice not go to you?

*patpatpat*

[scary_music]

Ooh, too late, Gundam-chan! See, see, you already took the first bite! You should have said something earlier! Whoops!

at least they're successful at being stupidly pretentious

[sthampede]

You will not bind me with this dark contract! Gundam Tanaka is beyond such trickery!

[scary_music]

Huh? But, look, look see?

[Ibuki holds up the cake that's already had a piece eaten from it]

See? See? There's no contract involved, it's just what happened! It's too late, it's a thing that happened!

What's wrong with having the first bite if the birthday girl is okay that you did? Ibuki's confused, she doesn't understand!

[sthampede]

The fey may seek to snare unwary mortals by feeding them otherworldly delicacies, but you, woman of the barrows, will not so easily bewitch me.

[He sends the cake a disdainful glance and gestures toward it extravagantly.]

You may have drawn first blood, but the battle was mine the moment it began! I will continue to consume this confection, but only after you have dosed yourself in equal measure.

oh Gundam, you think you got Ibuki but you just dug yourself a deep hole

[scary_music]

In equal measure?

I see, I see... Gundam-chan, you're surprisingly bold! But very well, Ibuki will bow to your demands!

If it's to be in equal measure, then it's Gundam-chan's turn to feed Ibuki!

[And she's handing you the fork, Gundam...]

o shi

[sthampede]

[His turn to what?!]

I...

[His mouth works silently for a moment, shuts, then opens again for a strained laugh.]

You would... dare?!

[He stares at the fork, looking utterly lost for a second or two before the facade falls into place one more.]

Impressive... most impressive, Ibuki Mioda! And yet, how futile! For any hand of mine to offer sustenance to another, they must undertake a series of trials... terrible trials, the likes of which would fracture your mortal mind to hear! The burden is doubled when the seeker is human, and though you poorly suit the category, there remains no other recourse.

[He tries, yet again, to free himself from her, trying to be subtle and failing miserably.]

I am afraid you must tend to your corporeal needs yourself, for I find that I am suddenly needed elsewhere.

[scary_music]

Huh? Huhhh?

You can't just leave, Gundam-chan! It's Ibuki's birthday! You haven't even been here for that long!

[Sorry Gundam but she's holding on even tighter now after what you just said]

[sthampede]

[Had he been at all inclined toward cruelty, he might have shoved her off, ordered his Four Dark Devas to bite her, something, but as things are, he only looks increasingly uncomfortable, one hand lifting and hovering for a moment before attempting to gently pry her off. He's as averse to touching others as always, but this...]

Mioda. I must insist that you cease taking liberties with my person.

[scary_music]

What? Ibuki doesn't understand. Liberties? What liberties? Creative liberties? Ibuki can't make songs about Gundam-chan anymore? Why not?

[... though, she actually starts to release her hold now]

no I don't know what gundam thinks ibuki is anymore

[sthampede]

[He eases away carefully, too, hoping that if he moves slowly enough, she won't immediately start constricting again. Is she part python as well?]

This...

[He falters, then generally indicates the whole her touching him thing. Apparently, he can't quite bring himself to say it aloud.]

I realize that your mortal guise will be imperiled if you do not maintain a steady diet of soul essence, but surely you have noticed that I am immune to all attempts to drain my power. Ll the better for you; had you succeeded, you would have been incinerated.

1/2

[scary_music]

Huh? Huhh?

Gundam-chan, Ibuki has no clue what you're saying! You're saying you want to set Ibuki on fire?

2/2

[scary_music]

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT?! WHAT DID IBUKI DO TO DESERVE HER FLUFFY HAIR BEING SET ON FIRE?!?!?!

[sthampede]

[No, not AGAIN.]

Mioda!

[He hisses the name, wincing. Can she not refrain from making inane remarks all the time?]

Naught, as of yet, but continue to raise your voice in this manner and I may reconsider!

Gundam no baka!

[scary_music]

[Sorry Gundam, when did Ibuki respond well to your threats? Yeah, never]

GUNDAM-CHAAAN! STOP THREATENING THE BIRTHDAY GIRL!! HER HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER OF FEELS ANYMORE!!

Oooh, Ibuki's life has become a bad soap opera now! She needs all the cake!!

[She goes over to the cake, bracing herself against the table and... Well, if Gundam does nothing, she's going to slam her face into the rest of the cake]

haven't heard that one in a while. also, NOPE.

[sthampede]

[It's a far more extreme reaction than he had been expecting, but he's had enough; he takes the opening for what it is, slipping out of her grasp and putting a safe distance between them. So intent is he upon getting away that he doesn't quite realize what she's doing until it's too late, and with dawning horror, he watches as Ibuki faceplants into her cake.]

Mioda!

Haha I swear I don't normally play her so clingy

[scary_music]

[sorry, were you expecting a response this time? Ibuki is just laying half-draped across the table, face in the cake and not moving. It's hard to tell what she's doing]

i'm cool as long as she doesn't start hitting him with a mallet

[sthampede]

[... Is she dead? Had the poison caught up with her after all?!

Gundam shifts uneasily but doesn't move closer, warier now than ever. For all he knows, she could be waiting for him to drop his guard... or genuinely need some form of assistance. Considering her last statement, however...

Eyes narrowing, he takes a step or two to the side, seeking a better angle from which to view her mouth. Is she just eating her way through the cake now?]

curses, foiled

[scary_music]

[her face is completely buried into the cake, there's no seeing what her mouth is doing]

[... spoilers, yes, she is eating cake]

[sthampede]

[... Right, then.]

Very well. When you have risen from the grave once more, I will welcome your wrath with [shit don't say open arms] gusto. Until then, I depart!

[Annnnd trying to make a stealthy retreat now, a few low words to the Four Dark Devas of Destruction instructing them to watch his back. She will not surprise him again.]

[scary_music]

[Don't worry Gundam, you get to leave this time. Ibuki will just eat her comfort food without you]

[sthampede]

[also this is your fault]

[scary_music]

[Yessssssssssssssssshh it's the best thing ever, I'm so happy hahaha]

[... d-do you have a plurk or aim or anything << >> (sadly I leave for work soon but-]

[sthampede]

[MAYBE please ignore the overabundance of black cats]