dear_mun | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Darling...dear, dear darling writer of mine.

Where has the time gone? Yes, you and your writing, your story about how Sherlock and I survived, right? Yes, and there's work, yes yes, of course, tons of that. Planning, you're always planning? Maybe that's why you got me instead of Sherlock. Yes, that'd make sense. And those shows you watch, all that telly rots your brain, you can't even THINK when it comes to putting a journal together for me, can you?

Your life is so BORING. Why wouldn't you want to play with me? Come, I can bring you so much entertainment! Well, might not be entertaining for me but, that's where you come in. You find me a Sherlock, darling, and I'll spin your world whichever way you want. Consider this quid pro quo. Give me something to DO and I'll make life fun again.

You've got icons up, yes. And the journal. Hm, yes. But what about my profile? Or maybe even a post or two? I'm the Consulting Criminal, how do you expect people to contact me? Magic? You're absolutely RIDICULOUS! So SLOW and BORING. Just like the rest of the ordinary people. Ugh, you're never going to learn, are you?

Just, shut up and work on that journal of mine. I'd like to be presentable shortly for my clients, lest you wish on ruining my business, which would not be wise on your part.

Fix it before I fix you. And not in a good way.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Good to see you up and about again, sir. If you need a touch of force, you know how to find me.

Edited 2012-03-12 17:06 (UTC)

Mmm, I always know how to find you, Moran.

How has your little vacation here without me been? Relaxing? Rejuvenating? Make you hate me just that much more, yes?

Well. Short of making me want to put a bullet through someone's skull, possibly my own, it's been fantastic. Thanks for asking.

Sounds like it might be quite the distraction then. Maybe we can liven the place up a little. What do you think?

Please and fucking thank you. I've been dying for a little action.

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I thought your final problem was that we were both alive. And I was in your way.

[He tilts his head.]

Clearly you didn't solve it.

You thought wrong, Sherlock. And here, I thought you'd be smart enough to figure that out. Pity.

[curious look]

Are you really that thick that you can't figure out a simple riddle? How BORING of you.

Oh, I think we've already established that I am far from boring.

If that was the case, I wouldn't be sitting here bored out of my mind~

If you were bored out of your mind... you wouldn't be here to begin with.

[But, he's quickly boring Sherlock.]

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Now Jim dear, would you really want to take on a client who can't even figure out a novel way of contacting you without the metaphorical ad in the paper?

Of course not, my darling. But, you have to have backups for the ones who couldn't solve their way out of a paper bag. It's how most of my clients come about, after all, not that you would ever fit into that category ♥

I'm not anyone's darling, Jim, and most certainly not yours. But I'll take the compliment. And wonder what you want.

Whatever would I want from a woman who couldn't even beat the Virgin and the Iceman, hm? Yes, how are things going for you in hiding? Heard so many are after your pretty little head.

You always want something, Jim. Even a woman who couldn't beat Sherlock Holmes knows that.

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I can't imagine you fixing anyone in a 'good way'... [Oops. Molly you were supposed to THINK that, not say it! Don't taunt the criminal!]

Molly! Oh Molly, my dear. How have you been holding up?

Oh, um...f-fine, I suppose? How about...you?

'F-fine?' Oh Molly, has Sherlock been mean to you? What a naughty man, isn't he? I can straighten him out for you, if you'd like. But me? Oh, I'm on the top of the world. Just like I should be.

What, no! [She's quick to exclaim] Sherlock's just Sherlock. He hasn't been mean, you don't need to do...anything. [Really she just doesn't want to see him hurt.]

Oh, well...congratulations, then, I suppose.

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Why wouldn't your writer want to play with you?

Maybe because you're a bloody sociopath.

Psychopath, Johnny boy, is the word you were looking for. I'm not like your darling detective.

But Doctor Watson, I sure did miss you~

Sorry, can't say I feel the same.

And no. You're not like him at all.

Shame, absolute shame. And here, I thought we were so close!

[smile] We're two sides of the same coin, Doctor. We're more alike than you know.

Because you tried to kill me, you mean? I think that's an important difference right there between the two of you.

Stay away from him. Or next time, I'll have the gun on you. And I will shoot.