voicetesting!

[hadonejob]

Um. Yes. Hello there.

I'd hate to be a bother, really I would, but well, I've just happened to notice that you've been staring at a few of these, uh, "games" lately.

If I can make a request, I'd like to steer clear of the dangerous and disastrous ones. If it's — If it's all the same to you. Not exactly a fan of pandemonium. Especially when it's, ah, directed at me. Really not a big fan, in that case. And I can even make recommendations, since you're having trouble choosing.

Indecision's just a bloody pain. Probably a side effect of the brain damage. Quite common, I hear, among humans. A shame, but it's to be expected when they're composed of smelly flesh and organs. Why do they have so many, anyway? And useless, most of them, what with their need to eat and sleep. And bathe.

Ah, um. Not saying you're useless, of course. Or. Smelly.

I've known many fine humans. Brilliant ones. And not at all smelly. As it happens, uh, some of my best friends are humans.

Er, technically, I've only met one. And she did, in fact, have brain damage.

But. Well.

Comments

[energycreep]

[The caution was quite understandable, seeing as this little thing was so... tiny. Probably defenseless. How nice.] Maybe you'll get lucky and have a human who lacks the guts to do anything other than stare at them. Like mine.

Trust me, they're quite useless. And smelly. And probably brain damaged.

[hadonejob]

[ Are you a robotic vampire.

Should he be scared. ]

Ah, yes. Well, nice to see someone understands what I mean.

Trust — trust — you. Yes, absolutely. Fine idea. Never heard of a better one. I'll just trust you... over here, if you don't mind. From a, uh, safe distance.

But one that's still full of trust.

[energycreep]

[Oh yeah.

Probably.

The obvious nervousness makes him stretch his mouth into a bigger smile. Nice chompers. All long and sharp and stuff. Sort of like drill bits.]

Why so distant? It's perfectly safe over here. I promise.

[hadonejob]

[ My, what big teeth you have. ]

Perfectly safe. Right. Of course, of course. [ A vehement (nervous) nod. ]

But the air's so fresh here. [ The sound of a deep inhale. ] Just delightful.

I'm — I'm sure you can appreciate where I'm coming from. Never can be too careful. Respiratory maintenance and all.

[energycreep]

[All the better to eat you with, my dear.]

Machines don't breathe. [Okay, so NOS can give off the impression of breathing if he wants to. He does possess something like a throat, which he will now use to produce a low, soft laugh.]

You're a terrible liar.

[g00d_d0ggie]

[Here, have a nine-foot-tall combat droid all up in your nonexistent grill.]

Bweeoop?

[hadonejob]

Hey! Woah — woah — there. Do you — do you have any idea how rude it is to just sneak up someone like that?

Personal boundaries, mate. You should learn about them.

[g00d_d0ggie]

[Sneak up on you? Preposterous. D0G is a lot of things, but stealthy is not one of them. He prods the little talky ball with one massive finger.]

[restlesswings]

Humans also forget things! It's amazing how they can craft things that never forget, then forget where they keep their things! [Yes, that was the motorcycle talking. His rider stands beside him, speaking now:]

Sorry for the smell, it comes with needing to drink and keep cool.

Kino is a particularly smelly human! [Kino rewards the teasing with a kick.]

[hadonejob]

[ His eye narrows before he fidgets. ]

Uh, right. Hey — hello there, ah, particularly smelly human.

Er, sorry. That's not — that's not your name, is it? It was just, just a joke! Some good ol'-fashioned humor. Learned that one from Jerry. Haha. Ha.

[ Awkward pause. ]

Gotta love humans. They're great, just... great.

[bewareyourheart]

Just where have you been hangin' out, little guy?

[hadonejob]

Little guy?

[ Oh no you didn't.

(Sorry, Anakin.) ]

I'll have you know that I'm not diminutive. At all. Not in the least. Just the right width and height, for a nanobot of my size, thank you very much.

[bewareyourheart]

Hey, hey -- no need to get touchy. You're just smaller than most standard-model droids.

Speaking of which: did your maker not give you legs, or did you just lose 'em?