[Canon is Empowered]

[sistahspookums]

T-this is not what I signed up for when I sold my soul!

Comments

[notbloodylikely]

...Seriously? Sold it? Seriously?

[sistahspookums]

Well...yeah...

[notbloodylikely]

...So. Uhm. Is it, like, rude to ask what for? 'cos that sounds pretty personal but at the same time... Seriously.

[sistahspookums]

I-I just wanted those s-stupid blond bitches at school to leave me alone! And he said I'd be hotter then all of them...

[notbloodylikely]

...Run that by me again, babe?

[sistahspookums]

The girls in my school are the WORST! Horrible stuck up blond bitches who just...they never let me alone!

I guess they all got their looks from this demon...so he promised I could be even hotter. And like...eat all I want and never gain weight and never get another zit or wrinkle or...or anything!

[notbloodylikely]

Wow. That is....

Actually seriously tempting. I mean, I'm all natural tall, dark and handsome but still. I. Uh. [Normally he's not one to share this so easily, but being thrown off balance by the whole experience-] I traded mine too, so I guess I can't judge but... Your soul for being sexy? Like. Your whole soul?

[sistahspookums]

Well it's not like he offered to bargain for it...

[notbloodylikely]

Uhm.

Don't take this the wrong way, but it ain't kicked in yet, has it? I mean, you're pretty cute right now, but not demonically hot.

[sistahspookums]

Gee thanks. Jerk.

No, I picked up the pen and felt like...tingly. And then I'm here. So far as I know I've still got a soul.

[notbloodylikely]

Hey, you can't get mad at me for that! You're the one who wants, like, magic plastic surgery. I think you're pretty bangable as you are.

[sistahspookums]

B-bangable!?

[Shudder]

It's not plastic surgery it's magic.

[Like that makes it better]

[notbloodylikely]

Yup! I'd hit it, is what I'm saying.

[He seriously considers this to be being nice. He even gives her a thumbs up.

Because he's a dumbass.]

[sistahspookums]

[Well now her face is glowing red and she turns away]

P-perv!

[notbloodylikely]

Yeah, you can call it that if you want. But, I call it honesty.

[He chuckles. His speaking voice is deep, but his laughter is very deep.]

[sistahspookums]

Better to be an honest skeeze then.

[Nope sorry Feda, she's flattered but you're not her type]

[notbloodylikely]

[Good, because whose taste is 'borderline sex pest' anyway?]

Pretty much. Mother always said when I met a girl I liked to be honest with my feelings and dad always said there's no such thing as an unattractive girl, just unappreciated ones. Combine the two and... Me!

[sistahspookums]

Well they were wrong and so are you.

Life only works if you hide what makes you different. Standing out makes you a target.

And there are unattractive AND unappreciated girls. Thanks for rubbing it in.

[notbloodylikely]

Fuck that. I stand out all the time and life has worked out just fine.

[Of course, he stands out in very different ways.]

[sistahspookums]

Well you're lucky. That's not how it works in my world.

[notbloodylikely]

It's how it works everywhere. It's all about attitude, honey. You can wake up like 'oh, fuck me' or like 'oh fuck everyone.' I choose the...

Uh, latter and former, which one is the second one again?

[sistahspookums]

It doesn't matter if I chose the latter. It won't change how the world treats me.

If anything it'll just make it worse.

[notbloodylikely]

Eh. Maybe. I guess I can't really relate. I kinda like being a weirdo.

[sistahspookums]

Well lucky you. You're one of the weirdest people I know.

[notbloodylikely]

You don't know the half of it.

Feda Gandamak, professionally tall, dark and handsome. [He genuinely does a crazy old school type of bow, with a fist thumping on his chest and lowering right down. So when he's up straight, he can't see shit because of that stupid hair.]

Also, weird and loving it.