Giving the mun a pep talk....

[un_beau_coquin]

 [Spy quirks a brow and lights a cigarette. His lips twitch before he takes a deep drag.]

Whatever it is zhat you are doing.... I zhink it would be a good idea for you to stop. You 'ave already received a little gift, a celebration-- do not use me as a device to continue your procrastination. Écoute bien, d'accord? 

No matter 'ow much you enjoy little zhings like zhese, your schedule never allows zhem to work out 'ow you would like. Donc, do not even try. Let zhis be your last moment of indulgence before you return to your work, alright?

Comments

[not_onyourside]

Do such talks to your Mundane help?

[un_beau_coquin]

Zhey 'ave... Varying results. Sometimes zhis charm of mine works against me.

[not_onyourside]

Well honestly, how can anyone resist?

[un_beau_coquin]

Some like to play games, but who doesn't like a challenge every now and zhen?

[not_onyourside]

I am sure you are up to eet.

So, what ees zhis grand scheme your mundane has een store for you zhat you seem to zhink zhey will not follow zhrough on?

[un_beau_coquin]

Did I mention some grand scheme or are you putting words in my mouzh? Because I 'ave much better ideas about what you could put in zhere. [A wry grin.]

She is merely taking a trip down memory lane by dragging me back out 'ere. Zhat is all.

[not_onyourside]

Oh you do know what to say to make a man blush.

Alas, I had hoped you would be around for a while. Eets razzer tiring being zhe only Spy around.

[And he'd rather be tired for other, more fun reasons.]

[un_beau_coquin]

It is a talent, what can I say.

Playing wizh zhe ozzers can be boring, oui? Mais, it is possible I could make an exception if you 'ave a flexible schedule.

[not_onyourside]

Oh you will find me very flexible.

[Leer]

Well I was going to say our numbers were dwindling, but eet seems we have new recruits for zhe teams. Still, zhere are far fewer of us zhan zhere once were.

also excuse me since i am not caught up on all the comics ;-;

[un_beau_coquin]

You're all talk, chéri. I'm afraid you'll 'ave to forgive me for not trusting zhe word of a Spy.

New recruits? Fresh meat is always fun. In any case, we 'ave never quite been zhe type to find power in numbers...

All is well, I still adore you. I meant here in Dear Mun, there's a bunch of new players randomly

[not_onyourside]

Are you going to make me prove eet? Zhat seems so beneazz you.

[Or beneath him. Or whatever.]

Non, but still. Eets more entertaining when zhere's more people.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Good. Go back ta whatever hole you crawled outta.

[He's thrilled to see you. Honest.]

[un_beau_coquin]

I'm afraid crawling is not quite my style. Zhough I'm sure you're well acquainted wizh someone who enjoys being on zheir knees, oui?

[bring_the_beatdown]

I uh...

Wait, what?

[Give him a minute while his tiny brain processes that. And then he's pulling out his bat all threateningly.]

Hey! What tha hell is that supposed ta mean?!

[un_beau_coquin]

[Quirks a brow at the bat.] Whatever you would like it to mean, my dear boy.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Why are you such a freakin' creepazoid?

[un_beau_coquin]

I am a 'andful of zhings, but I don't zhink "creepazoid" is somezhing zhat applies. Or even a word zhat exists in zhe english language.

I'm sorry Scout hates you. I love you. <3

[bring_the_beatdown]

Who speaks English here man? I do, not you. Go back ta eating snails.

It's a beautiful budding father-son relationship <3

[un_beau_coquin]

My 'andle on zhe english language, as well as several ozzer unnameable zhings, is somezhing you clearly underestimate.

I much prefer les chattes to les escargots, in any case.

Teach him how to get ladies, dad.

[bring_the_beatdown]

You are so gross.

[NOT WHAT HE WANTS TO THINK ABOUT SPY.]

I don't know what tha hell you just said, but I don't wanna. So don't tell me.

the pointers would be bordering an oedipus complex

[un_beau_coquin]

I am fantastique. Again, your vocabulary fails you. 'Ow unfortunate.

Does it look like I'm in zhe mood to give you a French lesson? You zhink too much of me.

It would be so bad that it would be beautiful

[bring_the_beatdown]

Dude, you're so far from fantastic it lapped itself with the grossness.

Doncha got shadows to hide in or somethin? Something that's not bothering tha rest of us?

[hypocritical_oath]

Oh don't be such a spoilsport my French friend! How can science progress when there is no sense of adventure, no hint of imagination, no bodies to split open and examine under scalpel and bonesaw? Why, you almost make it sound wrong to participate in recreational activities. Work will never end, so you might as well enjoy what you can!

[un_beau_coquin]

So enzhusiastic, Docteur. Mais, zhis sort of fun involves ozzers, and as zhe team player zhat I am, I am simply keeping everyone's well being in mind.

Of course if I'm tampering with dead bodies like you seem inclined to do there would be no problem, but... I zhink I shall leave zhat to you.

[notintehkitchen]

Work means you aren't allowed to have fun?

[How sad. What kind of job was that?]

[un_beau_coquin]

Not zhis kind of work. Paper work, long essays, et cetera...

Chérie, not everyone can 'ave zhe pleasure of such a unique line of work as ours.

[notintehkitchen]

If she burned all her papers, it'd solve all her problems. Just think, they wouldn't exist anymore and she could do whatever she pleased! I think it's a good idea.

[un_beau_coquin]

Consequences, my dear, consequences. If life were only so easy it would not be much fun, would it?

[notintehkitchen]

But the consequences are what give you the rush?

[un_beau_coquin]

I zhought it was zhe fire zhat provided zhe rush.

[notintehkitchen]

For me, yes. But for others, it seems like they want to see if they get in trouble or not.

[un_beau_coquin]

Ah, zhe "rebel" type, oui? I am afraid not even my mundane falls into zhat category. Such a bore.

Tell me somezhing interesting to 'elp compensate, would you?

[notintehkitchen]

How does she live? Doing office lady type work is boring. I wouldn't want to be told to go get someone some coffee and how they can't have it too hot because it'll burn their throat. They're big babies.

Interesting? I do not know if a life of a Pyro would be of much amusement to that of a Spy.

[hasstandards]

You know this sort of thing doesn't work, right?

[un_beau_coquin]

What sort of zhing? An encouraging little speech?

[hasstandards]

Trying to talk your mundane out of bad ideas.

[un_beau_coquin]

Fortunately for me, I am not zhe only one attempting to guide 'er in zhe right direction.

'Ave you any first-'and experience in zhis field?

[hasstandards]

Yeah. It didn't go well.